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83 tags found.
4745 copypastas found.

How it feels to be a CSGO Liquid fan

I wake up from my slumber as the ray of sunlight passes the curtains and falls on my eyes, I sit on my bed for a while scrolling down through social media and then I make my way to the washroom. I sit on the toilet knowing this Liquid roster will never work out and as I defecate and the waste masses exit my body I look down and all I see is the current state of Liquid. As I flush the toilet I see the memories of the Intel Grand Slam run and all the other titles getting flushed and fading away into the pit of abyss. I look in the mirror and the flashbacks of last year's performances hit hard, I grab onto with the sheer force of hope. I hope that we shall rise one day, resurrect as a phoenix from the ashes but now it seems inevitable. The players on the team are way too passive and lord NAF himself cannot do anything. If you want to know how it feels to be a Liquid fan. It hurts everyday, every minute, every second, seeing my favorite team suffer. Seeing my lord NAF struggle in pain. The agony in his face and the sadness that multiplies every time they lose.
March 2022

CSGO

Kermit the Frog and the Twin Towers

It is actual Muppets canon that Kermit the Frog, in some way, had a role in bringing down the Twin Towers in the terror attacks of September 11, 2001. In "It's a Very Muppets Christmas Movie," a film released in late 2002, Kermit is shown a glimpse of what New York City might look like if he had never been born. Among the scenery of this alternate reality NYC, we find none other than the Twin Towers proudly standing in the background. They were, of course, long destroyed in Kermit's normal reality. And yet, in the world without Kermit, the war on terror is missing its powder keg spark. Who would've thought that green piece of fuck could kermit a terror attack on US soil, but there it stands unimpeachable... We have concrete, canon proof of involvement. Why the world hasn't stopped and asked further questions is only further proof of a media cabal keeping this conversation away from the masses. The Twin Towers would still be standing if it weren't for Kermit the Frog. Al Qaeda was the puppet this time, and Kermit the hand within.
April 2022

DEUCE TEST

twitchquotes: DEUCE TEST 💩 IF YOU TOUCH THE DEUCE, DEUCES WILD ⎝ PogChamp
twitch chat
June 2017

Chat Test

LPT: If you’re tall, when speaking to a short person, kneel down or else you’re being ableist

LPT: If you’re tall, when speaking to a short person, kneel down or else you’re being ableist Being short is a disability, and as a tall person, it's your responsibility to make sure short people don't get even more disabled by having to look up to speak to you. Doing this can damage their neck. Standing up while talking to short people also makes them feel threatened and unsafe so kneeling down not only prevents them from damaging their necks but also makes them feel more safe. Not doing this means you don't respect short people, you're mocking their disability, you're looking down on them and that's ableist, so be the bigger man and kneel. Thank you.
August 2021

ACHOO uh oh you just got the Delta variant!

ACHOO‼️🤧🤧What was that⁉️⁉️😏😏Uh-oh 😯 looks like you just got 👀👀 the Delta variant! 🙀😜😜 Don’t you know 🇺🇸⁉️🤢🤕🤒🤤 the world 🌍 HOE Organization 🙈👅 called it the most DOMINANT 👊🏼👊🏼 strain since the start of the 🗓 PANTIE-DEMIC 👄👌👈 No more touching daddy 😩😩 🧓🏼 until you wash 🧽🧽your dirty 🐾nasty 🤢 little 🤞🏼fingers ✋🏻🤚🏻✋🏻🤚🏻for 6️⃣9️⃣ seconds with sHOEp 🧼 and water 💧 👅 otherwise it doesn’t count 🤡🤡🤡 Time to stop 🛑 spreading the germs 🤮🥴🤒and start spreading 😧your legs🤤🦶🏽🦵🏻because everyone 👩‍🦰👨‍🏫🦹🏾‍♂️🧜🏼‍♂️has to keep TWERKING 😈😈from home! 🏡 SEND THIS TO 1️⃣0️⃣ other coronavirus cucks 👉🏾👌🏻otherwise Fuckboy Fauci 🙀🙀 is cumming for you 🍆🍑🍆
August 2021

Emoji Pasta

Coronavirus

COVID

Please quit calling it "Victory Fap"

twitchquotes: Would you guys please quit calling it "Victory Fap"? I find it very offensive, and I'm sure Rania does too, that you think Kripp can only become aroused through dominance in a child's card game. Please grow up chat, thanks
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

You have exceeded your monthly allowance of haHAA

twitchquotes: This is Comcast. You have exceeded your monthly allowance of haHAA and will pay overage fees of $20 per haHAA for the rest of this billing cycle.
twitch chat
July 2017

I wore a mask at Target today

I wore a mask at Target today. Three of my lungs collapsed as I got carbon monoxide poisoning from breathing in my own bacteria. A brave patriot wearing an Affliction shirt, a MAGA hat, and sweet wrap around sunglasses saved me by giving me CPR. I thanked him and asked if he was a doctor and he said "who needs doctors when we have our fellow Americans, the ones who are here legally I mean." I hugged him and threw my mask on the ground. The Star Spangled Banner played on the speaker system as everyone in the store ripped off their masks and threw them on the ground, chanting "down with communism!" God, Jesus, and all the angels looked down upon us from Heaven and clapped.
June 2020

Coronavirus

COVID

Need a STEM mind for Rick and Morty

twitchquotes: Teenagers and man children according to who? You? What is your standard? I'm a fan of Rick and Morty, and I've been watching since episode one. Most of my friends who are scientists love the show, because it has a sense of humor and plot lines that you need a STEM mind simply to follow, let alone interpret and appreciate. Most of the people who diss the show are standard literature, philosophy, sociology a business majors who would rather watch shit like The Office or How I Met Your Mother and other shit-tier shows. Get off your high horse
twitch chat
September 2017

Rick and Morty

Try being nicer when you say that Calvin

twitchquotes: Try being nicer when you say that Calvin so it comes across as constructive and less toxic that way you won't hurt anyone's feelings and everyone will be happy :)
twitch chat
October 2018
aimbotcalvin

Overwatch

I've always been a DC fan

twitchquotes: (sponsored spam) I've always been a DC fan (I guess you could say Fanboy LOL) but after watching Kripparrian play Marvel Future Fight, I gotta say, I'm HOOKED! Featuring iconic characters like Black Panther and Thanos, I gotta say, I'm pretty damn interested in this game. Thank you Kripparrian!
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

sellout

Reddit and Twitter changed their logos

twitchquotes: My entire life I’ve been a hardcore anti-minority white man who despised anyone who didn’t look like me, but today I saw reddit and twitter changed their logos to the color black, and now I’m sitting here in shock just thinking about my choices in life. Wow.
twitch chat
June 2020

Which one of you got reddit to send me this

Which one of you fucks got reddit to send me this shit "Hi there, A concerned redditor reached out to us about you. When you're in the middle of something painful, it may feel like you don't have a lot of options."
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Dear host EZ 🍷 of digital streams EZ 🍷

twitchquotes: Dear host EZ 🍷 of digital streams EZ 🍷 gentlemen from chat EZ 🍷 ask you to include male music EZ 🍷 with vocals EZ 🍷 of Gachirian era EZ 🍷
twitch chat
March 2020

KappaPride

Timed out for 525 seconds for typing hahaha

twitchquotes: I got timed out for 525 seconds for typing hahaha, In this time I realized that twitch originated from Nazi Germany and thus I grew the most manly pubic hair in my entire life and ate it to sooth my pains. Please no copy seig heil pasta
twitch chat
December 2014
strifecro

So you're going by "c9Sneaky" now nerd?

twitchquotes: So you're going by "c9Sneaky" now nerd? Haha whats up douche bag, it's Tanner from Highschool. Remember me? Me and the guys used to give you a hard time in school. Sorry you were just an easy target lol. I can see not much has changed. Remember Antwan250 the boy you had a crush on? Yeah we're married now. I make over 200k a year and drive a mustang GT. I guess some things never change huh loser? Nice catching up lol. Pathetic
twitch chat
April 2018
Sneaky

Tanner from High School

I AM OCTOSARI

twitchquotes: I AM OCTOSARI Squid4 YOU PLAY ME IN TURN 8 Squid4 I HAVE 8 ATTACK Squid4 I HAVE 8 HEALTH Squid4 I DRAW 8 CARDS Squid4 I HAVE 8 TENTACLES Squid4 MY NAME HAS 8 LETTERS Squid4 AND THERE ARE 8 TENTACLES IN THIS MESSAGE Squid4
twitch chat
August 2019

Hearthstone

Artifact is a timeless classic

twitchquotes: Valve's done it again! Another timeless classic that puts its competition to shame. Make no mistake, Artifact will become king of its genre, and Hearthstone and MTG will become relics of the past. When my wife's boyfriend showed me this game I knew it would be worth my time.
twitch chat
January 2019

Hearthstone

Artifact

NOT ANOTHER CHILDREN'S CARD GAME

twitchquotes: Kripp sighs sitting at the dinner table. “I have to play hearthstone again, FUCK!” Rania consoles him, “It’s okay sweetheart. I love you.” Kripp responds in tears “I have been having fun playing POE but I only got 6k viewers last night, how will we eat if I don’t play that goddamned Hearthstone for these morons!” Rania wraps her arms around Kripp’s neck, “It’s okay baby, it’ll be different, when Artifact comes out!” Kripp lets out a scream, “NOT ANOTHER FUCKING CHILDREN’S CARD GAME!”
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Artifact

I play Mister Yie in League of Heroes

twitchquotes: That's it noobs, come play me in a game of League of Heroes. I main with the hardest warrior - Mister Yie. I will build full wiji first so you know I'll be able to tank no problem. After that, I will build a Infinite Ledge and score so hardcore attack speed. That's right - I will be victorious
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing