[Copypasta] I hate gaming laptops

Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Big Chungus v2

🟫🟫🟩🟩🟫🟫🟫🟫🟫🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟫🟫🟫🟩🟫🟫🟫🟫🟫🟫🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟫🟫🟫🟩🟫🟫🟫🟫🟫🟫🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟫🟫🟩🟩🟩🟫🟫🟫🟫🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟫🟫🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 🈯🈯🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸ—»πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸ—»πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸˆ― πŸŸ«πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸŸ§πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸŸ§πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸŸ«πŸŸ«πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸŸ§πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸŸ§πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸŸ«πŸŸ«πŸŸ«πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸŸ§πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸŸ§πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸŸ«πŸŸ«πŸŸ«πŸŸ«πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸŸ©πŸŸ©πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»βšͺπŸ—»βšͺπŸ—»πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― 🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯 πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»β¬œπŸŸ₯βšͺ⬜⬜🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯 πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œπŸŸ₯β¬œπŸ—»πŸ—»πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œπŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œπŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œπŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― 🈯🈯βšͺβšͺπŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβšͺβšͺβšͺβšͺ🈯🈯 🈯🈯βšͺβšͺπŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβšͺβšͺ🈯🈯🈯 πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œπŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œπŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œπŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œπŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œπŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―β¬œβ¬œπŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»πŸ—»β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œπŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ―πŸˆ― 🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯 🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯 🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯 🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯 🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯 🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯 🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯🈯
January 2022

I released white fluid from my penis

Hello reddit, today I was rubbing my penis very fast with my hand then all of a sudden this massive release of white fluid came out of my penis, I searched up on google 'white fluid discharge from penis' and the results said I had a UTI. Could anyone figure out what came out of my penis?
November 2021

NSFW

Transcript of me cleaning my keyboard and reassembling it

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ ..//////PPPP;;;LLMNBIYNJHJNNKGBCVRYCZXXXX6Zew$;/BNM,.Z4110,HUQC////-*-*77778747474747//YU4:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/20214:30 PM 23/06/2021````````````````````12222225668886666666777777777-0000000099999999999999999999================= WEEEEEQQQQQQQRYIIIIIIIUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUIIIYYYYYYYYYT] [POOOOOOOOOOO ///////..,,MNN ///'[''''''''''''''''''...,M.////////////////////////;;/;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;/....,M,LLLLLLLLLLLKKKKKKKKJJJJBVCBBBBBVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVVCCCCCCCCC CCCCCC.....GBHNHZXXXXXXVGGGGGFFFFFFDDDDDDDDDD==[]]]]]]][=========MMMMMMM, KL,/,L;.,,,NMNMCL.,,,,,,,,,LKLK,L. SDADDDDSDWAXDDDDQWASEDXSSSD `1WEZESXE3ASZZZZZ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++-+00000000000000000006311.....12223653 7+OJUSQ q
June 2021

Magnus Carlsen has the most braindead viewership

twitchquotes: It’s funny how arguably the smartest person on this platform also has the most braindead viewership. What the hell even is a copypasta? Grow up.
twitch chat
April 2021
maskenissen

This is Bob Ross communicating from beyond the grave

twitchquotes: CoolStoryBob Hi, this is Bob Ross communicating from beyond the grave. I dedicated my life to painting so that you brats could do something more productive with your lives than sitting on your *** playing your stupid Atari games all day. I don't appreciate you morons abusing my legacy and turning me into some childish meme that you can spam on your little MSM chat thing. Now go paint a mountain or something and don't you dare copypaste this. CoolStoryBob
twitch chat
October 2016
Bob Ross

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing