[Copypasta] I hate gaming laptops

Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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RNGesus who art in Hearthstone

twitchquotes: RNGesus who art in Hearthstone, Random be thy game. Thy random come, Thy turn be done, on Azeroth as it is in Hearthstone. Give us this day our daily quest, and forgive us our misplays, as we forgive those who queue as hunter and lead us not into fatigue but deliver us from zero. For thine is the random, and the mulligan, and the topdeck, always yet never, Ameno.๏ปฟ
twitch chat
May 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

NaM emote

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–“โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–„โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–€โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
October 2018

How it feels to be a CSGO Liquid fan

I wake up from my slumber as the ray of sunlight passes the curtains and falls on my eyes, I sit on my bed for a while scrolling down through social media and then I make my way to the washroom. I sit on the toilet knowing this Liquid roster will never work out and as I defecate and the waste masses exit my body I look down and all I see is the current state of Liquid. As I flush the toilet I see the memories of the Intel Grand Slam run and all the other titles getting flushed and fading away into the pit of abyss. I look in the mirror and the flashbacks of last year's performances hit hard, I grab onto with the sheer force of hope. I hope that we shall rise one day, resurrect as a phoenix from the ashes but now it seems inevitable. The players on the team are way too passive and lord NAF himself cannot do anything. If you want to know how it feels to be a Liquid fan. It hurts everyday, every minute, every second, seeing my favorite team suffer. Seeing my lord NAF struggle in pain. The agony in his face and the sadness that multiplies every time they lose.
March 2022

CSGO

mommy! kripp just read my message!

twitchquotes: haHAA : mommy! kripp just read my message! HotPokket : who's kripp honey? haHAA : A mid-aged man , playing cartoon games to entertain children, BabyRage here's a picture of him. HotPokket Clap KKona Clap way to go son \ haHAA /
twitch chat
September 2017
Kripp

Sesame Street Celebrity Recruitment Department

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparian. Its Becky from the Sesame Street Celebrity Recruitment Department. Although "E-Sports" has indeed become mainstream, we unfortunately have declined your application to be on an episode of Sesame Street. We have already filmed the episode where "K" is the letter of the day. Thank you for your interest.
twitch chat
October 2015
Kripp
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