[Copypasta] I hate gaming laptops

Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.
December 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Addicted to copy pasta

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. You got me addicted to copy pasta you sick ***. I was 19 and on my way to my dream job when you first gave me a hit of this junk. Now I'm cappucino dongeringos in back-alleys just for another copy pasta. I'm chasing that first high and I'm scared I'll rip in pepperinos soon if I don't find help. Pls no crop a dingo pace the rhino my story.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Kripp's skill and knowledge of Hearthstone is incredible

twitchquotes: Wow Kripp, your skill and knowledge of Hearthstone is truly incredible. Never before in the history of humankind has any person been as good as you are at this game, at this moment, with this deck, against this opponent. You will, you must win the game. There is nothing that can stop you now.
twitch chat
October 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum?

Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum guys? My parents stumbled on this sub the other day and now I'm not even allowed to access Reddit anymore because of the sex talk they saw in here. This is not a peepee, poopoo and vajayjay fun house. We are not heathens whose only role in life is to fornicate and laugh about fornication and then ejaculate that nonsense, spurting and spewing this so called "humor" on each other like animals. This is a place of worship. Meme worship. God is not pleased with you all. Repent.
January 2021

xqcL

⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⣀⣀⣤⣶⣶⣦⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⣼⣿⡟⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠳⠂⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠉⠛⠛⠓⠀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⡿⢀⡄⠲⠶⢶⣶⠀ ⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⡘⠁⠀⣠⣿⣿⣯⡀⢹⡀⢀⣀⣠⡽⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣍⡉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠾⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀ ⠛⠉⠉⠉⠛⠓⠲⢶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡶⠁⠀⠀ ⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄⡈⠙⢿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠙⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⠀⠀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⡿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⣴⣶⣦⡄⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⣉⡉⠙⢻⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⡿⠛⢁⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠈⣿⣿⣧⠀⠙⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀
December 2020
xQcOW

Think about your actions

twitchquotes: I have noticed that, although this subreddit has 179,776 readers, I am not receiving 179,776 upvotes on my posts. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to click 'upvote'. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to upvote my most recent posts. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
twitch chat
September 2018

Classic

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