[Copypasta] I hate gaming laptops

Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.
December 2020
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PEPEGA

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July 2019

IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING ***SQUID GAME REFERENCE***??????!!!!!!!!!!11!1!1!1!1!1!1! 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱

😱😱😱 HOLY FUCKING SHIT‼️‼️‼️‼️ IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING SQUID GAME REFERENCE??????!!!!!!!!!!11!1!1!1!1!1!1! 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 SQUID GAME IS THE BEST FUCKING SHOW 🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯 GI-HUN IS SO HOTTTTT 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵 COME PLAY DDJAKI WITH ME 🟥🟦🟥🟦🟥🟦🟥🟦🟥🟦🟥🟦 YOU CAN PAY WITH YOUR BODY 🖐😟👊😟🖐😟👊😟🖐😟👊😟 MUGUNGHWA KKOCI PIEOT SEUMNIDA 🔫😠🔫😠🔫😠🔫😠🔫😠 What’s the game❓ What’s the game!❓ ❓ What’s the game!❓ ❓ What’s the game! What’s the game!❓ What’s the game! ❓ What’s the game!❓ ❓ What’s the game! ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ What’s the game!What’s the game!What’s the game! What’s the game!What’s the game!What’s the game What’s the game!❓ What’s the game! ❓ What’s the game!What’s the game❓ ❓ What’s the game! ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ What’s the game! ❓ What’s the game! ❓ What’s the game!❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ What’s the game! ❓ ❓ What’s the game!❓ What’s the game! ❓ ❓ What’s the game!❓ ❓ What’s the game! ❓ What’s the game!What’s the game! ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ What’s the game!❓ ❓ ❓ What’s the game!❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ What’s the game! ❓ What’s the game! What’s the game!What’s the game!What’s the game! What’s the game! ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ ❓ Oh no you failed the game!👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 Player 69420 eliminated!!!!!!!!!!!!!!😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂 r/squidgamememes r/unexpectedsquidgame r/expectedsquidgame perfectly balanced as all things should be r/unexpectedthanos r/expectedthanos for balance 🦑🎮🦑🎮🦑🎮🦑🎮 ⏺🔼⏹⏺🔼⏹⏺🔼⏹ 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂
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I'm leaving this community, jerma can't keep getting away with this

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Jerma985

i start cracking bongland jokes inna bri'ish accent. Am I the asshole?

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June 2021

greentext

British People

To be fair, you need a very high IQ to understand The Bible

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Bible. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Jesus’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike The Bible truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in God’s existential catchphrase "Never trust anyone completely but God." which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as King James's genius wit unfolds itself on the pages. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Bible tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
August 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing