[Copypasta] Kermit the Frog and the Twin Towers

It is actual Muppets canon that Kermit the Frog, in some way, had a role in bringing down the Twin Towers in the terror attacks of September 11, 2001. In "It's a Very Muppets Christmas Movie," a film released in late 2002, Kermit is shown a glimpse of what New York City might look like if he had never been born. Among the scenery of this alternate reality NYC, we find none other than the Twin Towers proudly standing in the background. They were, of course, long destroyed in Kermit's normal reality. And yet, in the world without Kermit, the war on terror is missing its powder keg spark. Who would've thought that green piece of fuck could kermit a terror attack on US soil, but there it stands unimpeachable... We have concrete, canon proof of involvement. Why the world hasn't stopped and asked further questions is only further proof of a media cabal keeping this conversation away from the masses. The Twin Towers would still be standing if it weren't for Kermit the Frog. Al Qaeda was the puppet this time, and Kermit the hand within.
April 2022
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Ben Shapiro counts to one million

So today, for the first time, my little toddler finally counted to ten. Everyone was celebrating, saying how proud they are in my kid, and then Ben Shapiro kicks open the door. "Oh you think it's impressive that they can count to ten? I can count to one million." and then proceeded, in my living room for the next two weeks, to count to one million. He then said "yep, another libtard destroyed" and then curbstomped my kid.
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

My son got kicked out of school

twitchquotes: My son got kicked out of school for letting a girl jerk him off in class. That's three schools now. Maybe teaching isn't for him. FeelsBadMan
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August 2017

All becoming SELLOUT

twitchquotes: When SPONSORED, my hand goes automatically in my pocket. I feel the texture of the dollars and I feel I have sex with the sponsor. All becoming SELLOUT
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April 2016
Kripp

sellout

Anime girl 10 open mouth

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠁⣀⣤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠺⠿⢿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠻⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣦⣄⠀⠀ ⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣿⠏⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣁⠀⠀⠀⠛⠙⠛⠋⠀⠀ ⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠇⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠁⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⠀⣐⣣⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⠀⠌⠻⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣶⣮⣽⣰⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⢿⣤⠄⢠⣄⢹⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⡆⢻⣿⣿⠃⢠⠖⠛⣛⣷⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣮⣝⡻⠿⠿⢃⣄⣭⡟⢀⡎⣰⡶⣪⣿⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⠟⣛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⡿⢁⣾⣿⢿⣿⣿⠏⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣻⣿⡟⠘⠿⠿⠎⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣵⣿⣿⠧⣷⠟⠁⠀⠀ ⡇⠀⠀⢹⣿⡧⠀⡀⠀⣀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⢰⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⢻⢰⣿⣶⣿⡿⠿⢂⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣻⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠿⠟⣁⣴⣾⣿⣿⠿⠿⣛⣋⣥⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡀
August 2019

Weebs

NSFW

Don't install Talking Roby

When I was 8 years old, I was searching for apps that were like Talking Tom. I found one that was called “Talking Roby The Robot”, I was curious so I downloaded it and installed it. I played it and I enjoyed every single second of it. I was a big fan of Roby. But when, it was 3 AM, my mom was sleeping so I now could use the phone without mom knowing, Tried the text to speech feature and typed the words “sing like dick”. The robot said “sing like dick”. I almost laughed too hard after seeing that. I recorded it and uploaded it to YouTube. after uploading it, I heard The Exorcist theme playing in the living room radio. I was shocked, I couldn’t move, and then Roby himself came out of my closet and said “sing like dick”. I was crying in fear, “is this a nightmare?” I asked. Roby said “no”. I was scared, this was real all along? And then Roby bled at me with hyper-realistic eyes and said: “666”. I was crying, and then he disappeared. My life has changed after that moment. Don’t install Talking Roby.
February 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing