I used to be a real ad
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SPOOKY SCARY SKELETONS

twitchquotes: ヾ(❛ε❛“)ʃ SPOOKY SCARY SKELETONS SEND SHIVERS DOWN YOUR SPINE SHRIEKING SKULLS WILL SHOCK YOUR SOUL SEAL YOUR DOOM TONIGHT ヾ(❛ε❛“)ʃ
twitch chat
September 2014
imaqtpie

As a auto chess main at a respectably high elo

twitchquotes: As a auto chess main at a respectably high elo, this game is hard to watch. Literally cringing at some of these mistakes. If you actually want to learn autochess PM me (im silver 2 24lp) I also do coaching.
twitch chat
June 2019
Reckful

Teamfight Tactics

I used to be a real ad

The Rumor Come Out: Does MoonMoon is Gay?

twitchquotes: The Rumor Come Out: Does MoonMoon is Gay?MoonMoon is gay is the most discussed in the Twitch in the few years ago. Even it has happened in 2016, but some of the Twitch still curious about what is exactly happening and to be the reason there is a rumor comes out about his gay. At that time MoonMoon became the massive social networking rumor. The Twitch, especially his chat are shocked. MoonMoon just came out with his bad rumor which is spread massively.
twitch chat
January 2018
MOONMOON

KappaPride

This guy's veganism is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: ☑ This guy's veganism is CRAZY!” ☑ “My vegetables can't win against fruits like that” ☑ "He needed PRECISELY those two cucumbers to win" ☑ “He bought the only tomato that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect eggplants ☑ “There was nothing I could cook” ☑ “I ate that perfectly”
twitch chat
May 2017
Kripp

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

There are too many people that call themselves what they are not

There are too many people that call themselves what they are not, including on this very server. The design industry seems the worst, but I'm sure its the same in other professions. Everyone with 3 months of some Google class, suddenly calls themself an UI/UX Designer, while the craft (especially UX) takes years to develop. I also know a lot of professional designers that have 20+ years of experience, and still don't call themselves experts. Lucky for us, the professional market also sees through those fake designers. So, hone your craft, become better, and stop calling yourselves UI/UX Designers, when you are not. Or Full Stack Developer, when you only do HTML and CSS. Or Open Heart Surgeon, when you are only a masseuse.
July 2022
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

in germany we have a beautiful saying if you like a girl

twitchquotes: in germany we have a beautiful saying if you like a girl "deine mutter lutscht schwänze in der hölle" it means your smile brightens my day :) Please no copy pasta
twitch chat
July 2017

Complexities behind classical music

twitchquotes: Chat doesnt understand the complexities behind classical music. While most of chat spends their days spamming "Kappas" and such, I study music theory and the works of Bach and Mozart. Musical masterpieces such as these are not easy for the average person to comprehend, and certainly above those that chat.
twitch chat
July 2018

I hate Twitch Chat

"Just one more" Kripp muttered

twitchquotes: "Just one more" Kripp muttered, as the sun slowly rose over the Canadian horizon. His forehead dripping with Vegan sweat, his eyes droopy with fatigue, Rania at the door with suitcases of her stuff and signed divorce papers, and Dex a mere pile of starved bones, Kripp once again clicked the Queue button with Ashka at the ready. "This time I'll get MVP for sure."
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Battlerite

Jeremy of the Marvel Future Fight Team here!

twitchquotes: Hey everyone, Jeremy of the Marvel Future Fight Team here! PermaSmug We are glad to see chat loves the game. You can download it for free for IOS of Andrioid right now and get 500 gems for free! Want to play more? No problem! Just use this 👉 💳 and you may continue!
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

sellout

New banger (from r/conservativerap)

Aye 😂 Yuh 👌🏾👀 Uh 😔😤 Skrrrt 💨🤔 I 👁 hate 😡 people 👫 who have a different 😡 skin 💅🏻👑 color 🎨 from me (x32) instrumental 🎺 break 💔 I 👁👀 hate 😡🌚 people 👫 who have a different 👀❓⁉ skin 💅🏻👑 color 🏳️‍🌈 from me (x32)
June 2021

Emoji Pasta

I used to be a real ad

So I’m an AMC shareholder

So I’m an AMC shareholder, which means I own some of the business. Because the stock kept getting halted today I decided to go to my local AMC and support the stock by buying some concessions. I went up to the stand and told the casher (his nametag said Melvin) that I was a shareholder and wanted to support the business. He looked excited and told me to close my eyes and hold out my hand for a surprise shareholder treat. I can’t believe it, but he just covered my hands in liquid butter! Now I’m typing this at home and cant get it off my hands, and my keyboard is all greasy typing this, What do I do?
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Your stream has provided a constant influx of salt

twitchquotes: Mr. Kripp, I would like to personally thank you for saving my life. I lead a stressful life and have dangerously high blood sugar. Your stream has provided a constant influx of salt which has balanced my blood sugar levels, and according to the doctor I'm gonna do just fine now. Please remember that every time you get flamestriked, your saltiness cures another middle-aged man like myself of diabetes.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

One off lethal

twitchquotes: Discovering his inner-passion for painting, Kripp leaves Twitch for good and takes Rania and Dex on the road with him to pursue his dream. After six months Kripp realizes being an artist is a lot harder than playing video games. But it’s too late. Homeless and starving, Rania hates Kripp, Dex hates Kripp, and, worst of all, Kripp hates Kripp. Buying a gun one rainy day, he puts it in his mouth and pulls the trigger. *click* He forgot to buy bullets. “One off lethal,” Rania sobs.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Can you guys stop spamming

twitchquotes: Can you guys stop spamming and actually type something relevant to the match. all of you just want attention
twitch chat
May 2018

its 3 am and i fucked up really bad

I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
April 2021
What happened to this ad? :(

Yup, it's gamer time!

twitchquotes: No women: check. No leftists: check. No minorities: check. Yup, it’s gamer time!
twitch chat
April 2019

Your journey to casualness is almost complete

twitchquotes: Trump and Massan watch Kripp together in silent amusement as he slowly enters TSM's lair. "Kripp" Trump announces, "your journey to casualness is almost complete. Henceforth, you shall be known as, Casualarrian." Kripp bows down before him, and says " It is my destiny."
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Sleeping naked is a power move anyways

Sleeping naked is a power move anyways. • ⁠Burglar breaks in boom I’m up and naked. He’s too distracted trying to determine if I’m a man or woman because of my massive bush to notice me reaching for my glock fawty. ⁠• ⁠When I pee or poop in my sleep from the nightmares I don’t get any clothes dirty just the sheets. • ⁠Save money on not having to run an AC in the summer time so I can buy my wife more lingerie for her boyfriend to appreciate.
August 2021

Bow Gnar

A Bow Gnar is a physiological phenomenon in which the Gnar at full Mana becomes firm with extra Armor, engorged with HP, and enlarged. Bow Gnar is the result of a complex interaction of psychological, neural, vascular, and endocrine factors, and is often associated with shapeshifter's bestialities, although Bow Gnar can also be spontaneous. The shape, angle, and direction of a Bow Gnar varies considerably between players.
July 2022

Teamfight Tactics

What happened to this ad? :(

I WANT KRIPP TO LOSE

twitchquotes: FeelsGoodMan I WANT KRIPP TO LOSE FeelsGoodMan I WANT KRIPP TO LOSE FeelsGoodMan I WANT KRIPP TO LOSE FeelsGoodMan
twitch chat
May 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing