[Copypasta] Hello Kripp, Deathgarden developer here

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, Deathgarden developer here. I finally see that you got your vegan bitch ass to work. Remember, you're forced by contract to show off this game in all its splendor. And not only I'm paying you with a fuckton of money, but you also might get your wife back soon enough. So you better start getting some kills and play decently, or you will have to say goodbye to your midget dog. Happy gaming.
twitch chat
June 2019
Kripp

sellout

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Pump the brightness and feel have sex with videos

twitchquotes: Ｗｈｅｎ ｂｅｄ ｍｙ ｌａｐｔｏｐ ａｕｔｏｍａｔｉｃａｌｌｙ ｇｏ ｔｏ ｔｈｅ ＹｏｕＴｕｂｅ． Ｉ ｐｕｍｐ ｔｈｅ ｂｒｉｇｈｔｎｅｓｓ ａｎｄ ｆｅｅｌ Ｉ ｈａｖｅ ｓｅｘ ｗｉｔｈ ｔｈｅ ｖｉｄｅｏ ａｌｌ ｂｅｃｏｍｉｎｇ Ｋｒｉｐｐａｒｒｉａｎ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Kripp's lettuce points

twitchquotes: The year is 2035. Kripp's lettuce points have quickly developed into one of the most valuable crypto currencies in the world. Elsewhere, Tanner sits alone in his dark, dingy apartment, watching Kripp's stream, desperately trying to gamble for some lettuce points. He types "!bet 2 all" in chat, and anxiously awaits the results. Upon seeing Kripp go 0-3, Tanner puts a gun to his head and lets out one final "never lucky" before pulling the trigger.
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

Tanner from High School

Tanner throws his disheveled red McDonald's hat

twitchquotes: Tanner throws his disheveled red McDonald's hat and apron onto the beer-stained couch. He turns on the computer monitor which nearly blinds him, and light floods the room, revealing the months worth of pizza boxes and beers strewn about the floor. He opens Microsoft Edge. His fingers stick to the keyboard as he types "Kripp's stream" into Bing search, ready for another successful day of roasting Kripp.
twitch chat
January 2019
Kripp

Tanner from High School

Cybrix's voice

twitchquotes: Ｄｅａｒ Ｃｙｂｒｉｘ， Ｉ ｈａｖｅ ｂｅｅｎ ｓｅｖｅｒｅｌｙ ｄｅｐｒｅｓｓｅｄ ｏｖｅｒ ｔｈｅ ｌａｓｔ ｍｏｎｔｈ ａｎｄ ｈａｖｅ ｃｏｎｔｅｍｐｌａｔｅｄ ｓｕｉｃｉｄｅ． Ａｆｔｅｒ ｈｅａｒｉｎｇ ｙｏｕｒ ｖｏｉｃｅ， Ｉ ｎｏｗ ｒｅａｌｉｚｅ Ｉ ｈａｖｅ ｎｏｔｈｉｎｇ ｌｅｆｔ ｔｏ ｌｉｖｅ ｆｏｒ ａｎｄ ｗｉｌｌ ｋｉｌｌ ｍｙｓｅｌｆ ｔｈｉｓ ｗｅｅｋ．．．． Ｔｈａｎｋｓ ｆｏｒ ｍａｋｉｎｇ ｍｙ ｄｅｃｉｓｉｏｎ ｓｏ ｅａｓｙ OpieOP
twitch chat
June 2014
Kripp

A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage

twitchquotes: A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage far too small for himself. Malnourished because of his "vegan" diet, his ribs are clearly visible through his coat. He barely has the energy to move, let alone enjoy life. Yet, he knows there's hope. He knows he could draw attention to himself, as he hears Kripp constantly talking to someone. In a single act of defiance, Dex barks to draw attention to his dire situation. "Quiet, Dex" is his only reply as Kripp ignores his pleas yet again.
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp
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