[Copypasta] One off lethal

twitchquotes: Discovering his inner-passion for painting, Kripp leaves Twitch for good and takes Rania and Dex on the road with him to pursue his dream. After six months Kripp realizes being an artist is a lot harder than playing video games. But it’s too late. Homeless and starving, Rania hates Kripp, Dex hates Kripp, and, worst of all, Kripp hates Kripp. Buying a gun one rainy day, he puts it in his mouth and pulls the trigger. *click* He forgot to buy bullets. “One off lethal,” Rania sobs.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp
Kripp does a painting stream: https://www.twitch.tv/videos/326256844
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage

twitchquotes: A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage far too small for himself. Malnourished because of his "vegan" diet, his ribs are clearly visible through his coat. He barely has the energy to move, let alone enjoy life. Yet, he knows there's hope. He knows he could draw attention to himself, as he hears Kripp constantly talking to someone. In a single act of defiance, Dex barks to draw attention to his dire situation. "Quiet, Dex" is his only reply as Kripp ignores his pleas yet again.
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Kripp, this is the value-police

twitchquotes: (▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿) Kripp, this is the value-police. We are under the impression that you have 1 too many Priestesses of Elune in your deck, please fix this or come with us.(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

When soup, my spoon automatically go to bowl

twitchquotes: ｗｈｅｎ ｓｏｕｐ， ｍｙ ｓｐｏｏｎ ａｕｔｏｍａｔｉｃａｌｌｙ ｇｏ ｔｏ ｔｈｅ ｂｏｔｔｏｍ ｏｆ ｔｈｅ ｂｏｗｌ． ｉ ｔａｓｔｅ ｔｈｅ ｍｏｒｅ ｆｌａｖｏｕｒ ａｎｄ ｆｅｅｌ ｈａｖｉｎｇ ｓｅｘ ｗｉｔｈ ｔｈｅ ｓｐｉｃｅ． ａｌｌ ｂｅｃｏｍｉｎｇ ｆｕｃｋ ｙｏｕ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Saving up salt for a trip to Greece to touch the Kripp

twitchquotes: I want to touch the kripp, I tell myself. I save up my salt for years to get a trip to greece. I ring the dong bell and out the comes the border kripp face, I smell the aroma of salt and prosterinos. In his hand is a ornate salt shaker and one of reynads 15 guitars. He shoots me in the face with a fireball saying "Assume they have fireball, cause they do have fireball" from that day foward Ive never washed my face again.
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

Thinking of the greatest Hearthstone player

twitchquotes: Sometimes, late at night when I am under my covers, I touch my stealth donger and think of the greatest hearthstone player, the very best there ever was, then in a desperate attempt to not fap i think of Kripp, and that's it, donger is gone, i whisper "casual" and go back to sleep.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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