[Copypasta] Sleeping naked is a power move anyways

Sleeping naked is a power move anyways. • ⁠Burglar breaks in boom I’m up and naked. He’s too distracted trying to determine if I’m a man or woman because of my massive bush to notice me reaching for my glock fawty. ⁠• ⁠When I pee or poop in my sleep from the nightmares I don’t get any clothes dirty just the sheets. • ⁠Save money on not having to run an AC in the summer time so I can buy my wife more lingerie for her boyfriend to appreciate.
August 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Leper gnome into the Twisted Nether

twitchquotes: "Yᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ɪs ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ.” Fᴏʀsᴇɴ sᴀɪᴅ, ᴀs ʜᴇ sʟɪᴘᴘᴇᴅ ʜɪs ғᴇᴍɪɴɪɴᴇ ʜᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴛᴏ Tʀᴜᴍᴘs’s ᴘᴀɴᴛs ᴀɴᴅ sᴍɪʀᴋᴇᴅ. “Aʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʀʏɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴛᴏᴘ-ᴅᴇᴄᴋ ᴍᴇ?” ᴘʀᴏᴛᴇsᴛs Tʀᴜᴍᴘ, ᴀs Fᴏʀsᴇɴ ʙʟᴜsʜᴇs, ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴏʏɪsʜ ғɪɢᴜʀᴇ ᴜɴᴅʀᴇssᴇᴅ ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ Tʀᴜᴍᴘ. “Wᴇᴀᴋ ᴛᴇᴍᴘᴏ ᴘʟᴀʏ, Fᴏʀsᴇɴ.” Tʜᴇ ᴛᴡᴏ ᴋɪssᴇᴅ, ᴅᴇᴇᴘʟʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀssɪᴏɴᴀᴛᴇʟʏ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴀғᴛᴇʀᴡᴀʀᴅs Fᴏʀsᴇɴ ᴘʟᴀᴄᴇs ʜɪs ʟᴇᴘᴇʀ ɢɴᴏᴍᴇ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴛʀᴜᴍᴘs's ᴛᴡɪsᴛᴇᴅ ɴᴇᴛʜᴇʀ
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my übernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021

These aren't the dongs you're looking for

twitchquotes: ༼ ºل͟º༼ ºل͟º ༽ ヽ( ͡°╭͜ʖ╮͡° )ﾉ These aren't the dongs you're looking for (▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)
twitch chat
December 2014
Forsen

Hello this is Dan from the next room over

twitchquotes: Hello this is Dan from the next room over. Can you be quiet for 2 minutes it's almost 2am and I can still hear you. I have had a hard day doing REAL work for 13 hours and all I want is a bit of peace and quiet. LOL just kidding it's Tanner from highschool again, enjoy playing your kids games while I'm hanging out with Becca. We're watching re-runs of that time you lost that video game tournament. Peace out!
twitch chat
June 2019

Tanner from High School

Traumatized Mr Incredible

➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖⬛⬛⬛➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖➖➖➖⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖➖➖⬛⬛⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛➖➖➖➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖➖➖⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛➖➖➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖➖⬛⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛➖➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖➖⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛➖➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖⬛⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛➖➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖⬛⬛⬛⬛⬜⬛⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖⬛⬛⬛⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖➖➖➖ ➖➖⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖➖➖➖ ➖➖⬛⬛⬛⬜⬜⬜⬛⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖➖➖ ➖➖⬜⬛⬛⬜⬜⬛⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖➖➖ ➖➖➖⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬜⬛⬛➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖➖ ➖➖➖➖⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖ ➖➖➖⬛⬛⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖ ➖➖⬛⬛⬛⬛⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛➖ ➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖ ➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖
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February 2022
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