Sleeping naked is a power move anyways.
• Burglar breaks in boom I’m up and naked. He’s too distracted trying to determine if I’m a man or woman because of my massive bush to notice me reaching for my glock fawty.
• When I pee or poop in my sleep from the nightmares I don’t get any clothes dirty just the sheets.
• Save money on not having to run an AC in the summer time so I can buy my wife more lingerie for her boyfriend to appreciate.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Minecraft good. Fortnite bad.
Steps up to mic, straightens tie, clears throat, taps mic.
"This thing on?"
Murmurs of assent.
Clears throat again.
"Minecraft good."
The crowd excitedly begins to talk amongst themselves, many holding bated breath.
"Fortnite..."
A hush falls over the crowd, rapt attention held.
"Bad."
Suddenly, the crowd goes wild, screaming their praise, demanding awards, running over each other to hug a loved one. Whistles of elation are heard and many are seen sobbing. World peace is enacted in acknowledgement to this monumental speech that knit the world together.
Fortnite
Minecraft
Do you know who else didn't pet cats?
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, do you know who else didn't pet cats? Hitler. Hitler didn't pet cats. Do you want to be a Nazi too?
twitch chat
Kripp
Holding up a sign
|￣￣￣￣￣￣￣|
| Dumb |
| Opinion |
| Here |
|＿＿＿＿＿＿＿|
(\__/) ||
(•ㅅ•) ||
/ づ
I sexually identify as Ninja Fortnite Gaming
I sexually identify as Ninja Fortnite Gaming. Ever since I was young, I've dreamed of understanding "the pain of being famous", and producing shitty keyboards. People say to me that he was only popular in 2017, but I disagree. He will always have a special place in my heart. From a young age, I knew I was different. Dying my hair blue, being overly cocky, and stealing others' identities were just a few of my favorite childhood pastimes. I'm just not like other guys. From now on, I want you guys to call me Ninja Fortnite Gaming (Tyler Blevins is not acceptable). My pronouns are fort/nite. If you don't use or respect them you're a gamephobe griefer and need to try out his new skin and Gfuel flavor Chug Jug to become more culturally sensitive. Use code NINJAYT for 30% off your order today. Thank you for being understanding.
Ninja
I sexually Identify as an LGM-30 Minuteman III
twitchquotes:
I sexually Identify as an LGM-30 Minuteman III intercontinental ballistic missile. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of delivering a W78 nuclear warhead with an explosive yield of 3x500 kilotons of TNT anywhere on the planet at Mach 23. People say to me that a person being a Minuteman III is impossible and I’m incredibly destructive but I don’t care. I’m having Air Force Global Strike Command install new three-stage solid-fuel rocket engines and give me an $86 billion upgrade on my 59 foot body. From now on I want you guys to call me "ICBM" and respect my right to be in service until at least the 2030s. If you can’t accept me you’re missileophobe and need to check your local AFB for missile silos. Thank you, and I'll see you in WW3.
twitch chat