[Copypasta] Response to "go fuck yourself"

What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
April 2020

Classic

I used to be a real ad
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R-Reynad-sama? Could you please roleplay?

twitchquotes: (ยปยฐ _ ยฐยซ) R-Reynad-sama? Could you please, um, roleplay, so when your hero takes damage... you um, p-pretend y-you take damage...! T-thank you... (>/////<)
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January 2015
Reynad

Weebs

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Hearthstone

Spooky skeleton

โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–โ–Œโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–โ–Œโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘
November 2014

Classic

Based? Based on what?

Based? Based on what? In your dick? Please shut the fuck up and use words properly you fuckin troglodyte, do you think God gave us a freedom of speech just to spew random words that have no meaning that doesn't even correllate to the topic of the conversation? Like please you always complain about why no one talks to you or no one expresses their opinions on you because you're always spewing random shit like poggers based cringe and when you try to explain what it is and you just say that it's funny like what? What the fuck is funny about that do you think you'll just become a stand-up comedian that will get a standing ovation just because you said "cum" in the stage? HELL NO YOU FUCKIN IDIOT, so please shut the fuck up and use words properly
December 2020

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Kog'Maw's passive

twitchquotes: Hi Imaqtpie. I noticed that in your games you utilize Kogโ€™Maws passive A LOT, but when I watch LCS players I see them go an ENTIRE teamfight without using their passive even ONCE. Are they playing the champion to its full potential or are you?
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

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League of Legends

Mods can't ban me at this pace

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿข SLOW AND STEADY ๐Ÿข WINS THE RACE ๐Ÿข MODS CAN'T BAN ME ๐Ÿข AT THIS PACE ๐Ÿข
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April 2017

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Text-to-Speech Playing