[Copypasta] its 3 am and i fucked up really bad

I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

My idiot boyfriend spent my college fund on dog coins how do I get it back???

He talked me into spending the $8500 I have on dog coins because something was supposed to happen yesterday which would have given us more money?? but it didn't actually happen or got canceled or something I don't really know or understand how it works but I went to the dog coin site to withdraw my money and there is only about $6700 of it there, where is the rest of it? I tried looking at the faq but don't really get it
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Classic

Hello Michael Santana, this is your local tax officer

twitchquotes: Hello Michael Santana, this is your local tax officer. Your last reply as to why you haven't paid your taxes is unnacceptable. "I'll check it out later" and "You know how I get down" are NOT valid excuses. We are sending our men over RIGHT NOW to start repossessing your house.
twitch chat
November 2016
imaqtpie

stop babyraging

twitchquotes: let's put out some rant here. you babyrage guys are pathetic. whenever kripp judges an aspect of the game, all of you take it as being salty and babyraging. its simply talking and discussing the game, dont be so closed minded, chat please.
twitch chat
July 2019
Kripp

If kripp has million number of fans i am one of them

twitchquotes: If kripp has million number of fans i am one of them πŸ™‹πŸ». if kripp has ten fans i am one of them. if kripp have only one fan and that is me πŸ™‹πŸΌπŸ™‹πŸ½πŸ™‹πŸΎ. if kripp has no fans, that means i am no more on the earth 😒. if world against the kripp, i am against the world βŒπŸŒβ˜„οΈ. i love #kripp till my last breath.. 😍 .. Die Hard fan of kripp πŸ€“πŸŒΉ. Hit Like If you Think kripp Best player & Smart In the world 🀠
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Inappropriate humor

twitchquotes: All of this β€œdick humor” is highly Inappropriate, my dick is 2.462 feet long and still growing, all of you twitch β€œcharters” can’t even compensate the size
twitch chat
April 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing