[Copypasta] its 3 am and i fucked up really bad

I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
April 2021
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Hold Ctrl and type Wash Your Hands

twitchquotes: ———————————————————————— imGlitch Twitch gives 100 bits for coronavirus awareness Hold Ctrl and type Wash Your Hands ————————————————————————
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March 2020

Coronavirus

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Your stream has provided a constant influx of salt

twitchquotes: Mr. Kripp, I would like to personally thank you for saving my life. I lead a stressful life and have dangerously high blood sugar. Your stream has provided a constant influx of salt which has balanced my blood sugar levels, and according to the doctor I'm gonna do just fine now. Please remember that every time you get flamestriked, your saltiness cures another middle-aged man like myself of diabetes.
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January 2015
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voting booth inspection is not required

twitchquotes: So I was waiting in line to vote when all of a sudden this voting "official" came up to me and said that there was something wrong with my voter registration and asked me to follow him to the back. When we went around back he said that I had to take off my pants and show my cock because penis size is the most accurate way to confirm voter identity. Because I thought he was a voting official I swiftly removed my pants and underwear to show him my member. After he fondled it for a bit he said it was good and I could go back into the line. It was only after I voted I realized that he forgot to check my balls too!!! He was obviously not certified to check such an area and I immediately contacted the security guards about his presence. Please do not fall for any tricks like I did! stay safe and happy voting!
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

which way would you move?

twitchquotes: If imaqtpie was in front of you, and scarra was behind you, and you were an inch deep in imaqtpie, and scarra was an inch deep in you, and you had to move an inch forwards or backwards, which way would you move?
twitch chat
July 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

KKona

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢛⣭⣥⣶⣶⣶⣦⣭⣭⣛⣛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⢛⣥⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⢫⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣌⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⢱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠉⠉⠙⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢹⣿⣿ ⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⢿⣿⣿⡇⢿⣿ ⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⢀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⢸⣿ ⡇⣿⣿⣭⣄⣀⠄⠄⣀⡀⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⠉⢸⣿ ⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠈⠉⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⢿⣿⣿⠆⣿ ⢡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣄⣀⣴⣶⣆⡀⠄⠄⠿⢿⣶⣿⣿⣰⢸ ⡜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⢰⢸ ⣇⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢻⣷⡾⣯⡉⠛⠉⠙⢩⣿⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⣾ ⡿⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠳⠿⠇⠄⠄⠄⣼⡃⠄⠈⢿⣿⠏⢡⣿ ⢣⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⢠⣀⠒⠲⠶⠶⠶⠖⠄⢀⠄⣴⣿⠟⠄⣾⣿ ⣇⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⠁⣼⣿⣿⣿⠿⠷⠄⠄⢴⣿⡏⠉⠁⠄⣼⣿⣿ ⣿⣧⡨⡻⡟⠛⠄⠄⠄⠨⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣄⣀⠘⠉⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⠿⠿⠟⠄⠙⠋⠄⠄⠄⠠⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣮⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⣱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣄⣀⣀⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
July 2019
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