[Copypasta] its 3 am and i fucked up really bad

I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Trolling my whole class with Among Us Part 3

We had a school assembly today, and the speaker was talking about bullying. The speech was pretty boring, but there came a point in his presentation where he said "I know there are some students among us who have been subject to bullying." Honestly, I couldn't believe my ears. I thought, "There is no way the speaker just said Among Us." I decided to troll the speaker by standing up and yelling "When the imposter is sus!" while making a huge grin (just like in the memes). To my surprise, no one laughed. Everyone fell dead silent and looked at me. The speaker said "I'm sorry, what was that?" I decided to explain to everyone what I was talking about, and said "Get it guys? It's from Among Us." Still, no one understood the reference. I turned towards my friend Caleb (I know him from band), and said "You get it, right? It's from among us!" However, he had his head buried into his lap. I looked at my friend Dalton (He plays the trumpet in band, just like I do), and yelled "Dalton, do you get the joke????" He didn't even make eye contact. Suddenly, the assistant principal came up behind me and said "Please sit down, this is a school assembly." I screamed back at her "SCHOOL ASSEMBLY?? MORE LIKE EMERGENCY MEETING!" I then naruto ran down to the stage, pointed at the assistant principal, and said "SHE'S SUS!!! I SAW HER FAKE A SCAN IN MEDBAY!" Still, no one laughed. I then said "I'm not the imposter, I was in vents the whole time!!" (referencing a meme). No one understood the reference. I saw people whispering to each other, but no one laughed. I then made a face resembling the "big chungus" meme, and said "You guys don't get it?? That's not very Wholesome 100." When I realized no one was laughing, I yelled "Don't any of you guys use reddit?" The audience was dead silent, until someone yelled "Sit down!" (which was very rude and not wholesome) I pointed back at him and shouted "You're breathtaking!!" I don't think anyone got the joke becaude no one laughed, so I said "Do you guys know who Keanu Reeves is?" No one responded, which is kind of cringe because I thought that at least SOMEONE would know who Keanu is. I ended up getting escorted to the principal's office and getting suspended for a week, but in my opinion, it was totally worth it. I trolled EVERYONE. I'm gonna forever go down in Reddit history. I also realized that there aren't any redditors at my school (which is very cringe in my opinion).
March 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

Tricky the Clown (Impropable Outset)

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠐⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠒⠺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠯⠿⡋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠴⠚⠉⠉⠟⢋⣹⠿⣿⣟⡛⠙⠻⣿⣿⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠙⢶⣿⡏⠀⠀⠉⠛⠻⠶⣬⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣶⣶⣦⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡍⠁⠘⡇⠀⡀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⣸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣾⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⢠⠆⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⢿⣿⣷⠀⠀⣴⣶⣿⡆⢠⡇⢀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣌⣾⣾⣿⣿⣿⡋⠁⣿⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⠶⠿⢯⣉⣙⡿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⠄⢀⡄⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⡿⠉⠀⠉⠳⠶⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⡚⠀⠰⠀⠀⠀⣼⡿⠋⠀⡴⡻⠁⡤⢞⢢⠚⢿⣿ ⣿⢟⠊⠀⠀⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠘⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠓⠦⣤⣁⣀⣩⠤⣴⠖⠋⠀⠀⣸⠤⡗⠐⠁⢉⠻⣞⠈⣿ ⡏⠀⠁⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣀⡆⠀⢻⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠱⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⣴⠃⠀⢠⠀⠀⢳⠀⢧⠀⠫⡀⠘⢈⠽⣿ ⡇⠀⢠⠂⠀⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠁⡇⠀⠈⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⢾⣟⠀⠀⠆⡄⠀⠈⢷⡉⠳⣤⣠⣉⣤⣾⣿ ⡇⠀⡼⠀⠀⠳⣄⣀⠀⠀⢀⡜⠀⠀⣀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠒⣊⣁⣴⣿⣿⢻⠶⣾⠁⠀⠀⠀⡽⠷⠾⠷⠛⠋⢹⣿ ⣿⣦⣌⡓⢢⣤⣀⣨⠽⠒⠋⢀⠔⠋⠉⠁⠀⠀⠄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠻⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⢸⡹⣆⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣼⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⢀⣠⡴⠷⠖⠒⠲⠤⢄⡀⠀⠈⠢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠔⠁⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠙⢦⢻⡝⠷⢤⣴⣃⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠑⠢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⠚⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠒⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢢⠀⠀⠀⣠⣟⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣷⣶⣾⣿⣧⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣤⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
June 2021

Let's say, hypothetically, that you are submissive and breedable

Let's say, hypothetically, that you are on your bed, and let's suppose that you are also submissive and breedable. Now, let's say you are a male. Statistically speaking, humans, that are submissive and breedable tend to be femboys, that's a fact (which doesn't about your feelings). Hypothetically under these circumstances, it would be statistically speaking uncontroversial to assume you would be wearing thigh highs (which would boost your breedability factor by about 20%). Now let's assume you are an SJW SOCIALIST LIBTARD, and let's say I was you, would it not be under these circumstances, the only correct course of action for you to take to ABSOLUTELY WRECK AND DESTROY me (in a debate) in bed?
April 2022

Ben Shapiro

Thats why this place is so special.

Listen 5 years ago I wanted to get into investing. I came to this sub to get some advice. One guy helped me with a stock I could invest in. It was dipping for a few days and I kept asking what I should do and he said hold. Kept quoting Warren buffet On the third day I panicked and told him I had to sell. He sent me a video and told me to watch it before I sold. It was a guy getting railed by jpow. I lost 400 dollars that day but it taught me some lessons. Now look at me. Been investing for over 3 years now. I was even on this gme thing. Yeah I could of made 8x the profits instead of 4 but I consider that my own fault. But through this great sub and everything I have learned, I reinvested my profits and as of today I am down 5 grand. Thats why this place is so special.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Crewmate pickle

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⡾⠿⠿⠿⠿⢶⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣈⣻⣷⡄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡇⠀⠀⣾⣟⠛⠋⠉⠉⠙⠛⢷⣄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣴⣶⣿⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⢹⡆ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⠿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠛⢻⡇⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣈⡇⠀⣿⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠋⠀⢸⡟⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠃⠀⠀⢰⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣸⡟⠀⣴⠖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⣿⠀⠸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⡏⠀⠀ ⠀⢀⣾⠃⠀⠀⠈⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⣸⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠪⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣧⠀⠀⠀ ⢰⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⡾⠋⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⠁⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡆⠀⣰⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⡆⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣄⠁⠀⣰⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⣧⢈⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠶⠶⠋⢀⣼⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠈⢻⣦⠓⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠙⠿⠶⣶⣤⣤⣶⡶⠿⠛⠉⠀
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Text-to-Speech Playing