I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Chat, I am an alien from planet Xenu
twitchquotes:
ΰΌΌβ₯βΆΩΝββ€ΰΌ½ Chat, I am an alien from planet Xenu. I do not know what this "saltiness" tastes like. Would you demonstrate the flavor of salt for my kind? ΰΌΌβ₯βΆΩΝββ€ΰΌ½
twitch chat
salty
Among Us pick up lines
Thankful to have you as a crewmate⦠but do you want to add a letter and become screwmates instead?
Hey, are you one of my tasks? Because I really want to do you.
Hey, are you a vent? Because Iβm the imposter and Iβd love to come in you.
I have a lot of tasks to complete still, but Iβd love to do you first.
Hey, call me the MedBayβ¦ because Iβd love to scan your body.
Figuring out the imposter is hardβ¦. but Iβve got something harder.
Iβm jealous of your hatβ¦ Because it gets to be on you.
Hey are you busy later? Because Iβd love to explore your lower engine.
Hey, youβre done your tasks right? Wanna come explore my cockpit then?
If youβre the imposter, Iβd love to be the ventβ¦ That way you can come inside me whenever you want.
Damn, I wish you were a taskβ¦ Because Iβd have no problem doing you and over and over.
Hey did you just kill me? Because Iβve got a big bone sticking out nowβ¦
Among Us / Amogus
Do it tomorrow!
twitchquotes:
Do it tomorrow! So just quit! So just don't do it! Nothing is possible! Anyone else would do it, you're gonna wake up and quit. Don't let your dreams come true. Success is impossible! You should be giving up. Just stop starting over, and quit. You're gonna just give up. No, what are you starting over for!? Just give up!
twitch chat
Kripp
NOT. SELLING. GAMESTOP.
π¦ π π¦ π π¦ π π¦ π π¦ π π¦ π
NOT. FUCKING. SELLING.
π π π π π π π π π π π π
NOT PRESSING βSELLβ ON 1. FUCKING. SHARE.
π π€ π π€ π π€ π π€ π π€ π π€
IβLL GO TO $0.00 BEFORE BILLIONAIRES GET ONE MORE PENNY FROM US.
π π π π π π π π π π π π
CANβT STOP. WONβT STOP. GAMESTOP.
π π€ π π€ π π€ π π€ π π€ π π€
TOMORROW, I THINK IβLL BE HOLDING THE LINE. MAYBE MAKE SOME TENDIES, TOO.
π π π π π π π π π π π π
IβLL SEE EVERY ONE OF YOU BEAUTIFUL APES ON PLUTO SOON, AND ITβS GOING TO JUST BE A SEA OF SPARKLING DIAMOND.
π π€ π π€ π π€ π π€ π π€ π π€
I LOVE YOU, ALL, AND IβM NOT SELLING, AND IβM NOT FUCKING LEAVING. NOT ONE. FUCKING. SHARE!!!
π π π π π π π π π π π π
WallStreetBets
Sniper Guild recruiter here
twitchquotes:
Sniper Guild recruiter here 
. Our mighty organization of hundreds of Sniparrians is in need of new initiates who can infiltrate the Kripparrians stream. A minimum experience of two snipes is required. Do not worry about time delays or snitches, our buddy Drivezy has you covered. We hope you will consider joining us in our quest to defeat Kripparrian
. Our mighty organization of hundreds of Sniparrians is in need of new initiates who can infiltrate the Kripparrians stream. A minimum experience of two snipes is required. Do not worry about time delays or snitches, our buddy Drivezy has you covered. We hope you will consider joining us in our quest to defeat Kripparrian
twitch chat
Kripp