I was hungry so i decided to eat some bbq wings and watch some anime. there was about 6 of it and i ate 3 and a half. that was when i started to feel a bit funky on my hand and mouth, and i thought to myself "wow, these bacteria are extra rough today". i used the flashlight on my phone to see what was going on and there was an army of ants covering my hands and i shit you not, i cough once and my mouth is a shotgun that shoots ants as bullets. i was covered in fear and ants and the urge to scream, but the fear of asian parents is stronger. i can only cry silently in a dark and quiet room, all alone, while being violated by ants.
What happened to this ad? :(
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Shrek is love. Shrek is life
I was only nine years old. I loved Shrek so much, I had all the merchandise and movies. I'd pray to Shrek every night before I go to bed, thanking for the life I've been given. "Shrek is love", I would say, "Shrek is life". My dad hears me and calls me a faggot. I knew he was just jealous for my devotion of Shrek. I called him a cunt. He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep. I'm crying now and my face hurts. I lay in bed and it's really cold. A warmth is moving towards me. I feel something touch me. It's Shrek. I'm so happy. He whispers in my ear, "This is my swamp". He grabs me with his powerful ogre hands, and puts me on my hands and knees. I spread my ass-cheeks for Shrek. He penetrates my butthole. It hurts so much, but I do it for Shrek. I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water. I push against his force. I want to please Shrek. He roars a mighty roar, as he fills my butt with his love. My dad walks in. Shrek looks him straight in the eye, and says, "It's all ogre now". Shrek leaves through my window. Shrek is love. Shrek is life.ο»Ώ
Shrek
Classic
Do you guys mind not spamming the chat so much?
twitchquotes:
π»π πͺπ π¦ ππ¦πͺπ€ ππππ ππ π₯ π€π‘ππππππ π₯ππ ππππ₯ π€π ππ¦ππ? π'π π£πππππͺ π₯π£πͺπππ π₯π π‘ππͺ ππ₯π₯πππ₯ππ π π₯π π₯ππ π€π₯π£πππ πππ πͺπ π¦ ππ¦πͺπ€ ππ£π πππ€π₯π£πππ₯πππ ππ. ππ πͺπ π¦ ππ¦πͺπ€ π£πππππͺ πππ£ππ πππ π¦π₯ π₯ππ π’π¦ππππ₯πͺ π π π₯ππ π€π₯π£πππ π π£ ππ π π ππππ€πππ πͺπ π¦ π¨π π¦ππ π€π₯π π‘ π₯ππ π€π‘ππππππ πππ ππ π‘πͺπππ πππ π‘ππ€π₯πππ. πΎπ π, π π€π¨πππ£ πͺπ π¦ ππ¦πͺπ€ ππ£π π₯ππ π¨π π£π€π₯ π‘ππ£π₯ π π π₯π¨ππ₯ππ. βπ π¦πππ'π₯ πͺπ π¦ ππ¦π€π₯ π₯π£πͺ π₯π ππ πππ₯π¦π£π ππ π£ π πππ ππ πͺπ π¦π£ ππππ?
twitch chat
MOONMOON
"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers
"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers, rather it is advice for them. When participating in intense periods of gaming, the human hand has a tendency to get sweaty. The sweat causes the hand to become slick, and it b becomes more difficult to retain a grip on the gamers gaming mouse, thus making it more difficult to perform well in intense gaming moments. By touching grass with the gamers hand, the grass will impart a layer of particulate onto the gamers hand, the particulate can be made of a variety of dusts, dirts and other natural matter. This particulate will then act in a similar form to climbers chalk, absorbing the sweat and drying out the gamers hand. With dry hands, the gamer can now perform to their maximum when gaming. This is why when an enemy or teammate tells you to touch grass, they are simply trying to assist you in performing better.
Classic
Attention Twitch Chat. Kappa IS BEING REMOVED
twitchquotes:
ATTENTION TWITCH CHAT. 
IS BEING REMOVED BY NAZI ADMINS. PLEASE SPAM SO THEY DO NOT REMOVE THE EMOTE.
ATTENTION TWITCH CHAT. IS BEING REMOVED BY NAZI ADMINS. PLEASE SPAM SO THEY DO NOT REMOVE THE EMOTE.
twitch chat
Kripp
Masturbation Notice from school
MASTURBATION NOTICE
It has come to our attention that students have been masturbating in the school bathrooms. Masturbating on school property is ILLEGAL and against school district policy
The bathroom pipes are NOT designed to handle human discharge or anything other than your regular bathroom duties
The excessive amounts of discharge build-up has caused a blockage in the pipes. Multiple pipes have become close to bursting due to the amount of excessive semen build-up. This will cost THOUSANDS of dollars coming from our funds to repair the damage caused by this
Please masturbate in your own homes and at your own disposal
If any discharge is discovered in the bathroom, it will be collected and analyzed to determine who it belongs to. If it is discovered that the discharge is yours, YOU will be fine $ 1,000 and be reported to proper authorities
Thank you for your cooperation