[Copypasta] Listen to me, chat. You have a problem

twitchquotes: Listen to me, chat. You have a problem. We both know you're depressed, anxious, and unhealthy in general. You spend all day on Twitch enjoying games vicariously through others and spamming copypastas in chat. This has to stop. I'm asking you NOT to copy and paste this message, but go outside for a change. Get a new hobby. Make some friends. Turn over a new leaf. It's your only hope at this point.
twitch chat
April 2018
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You can't stop what's coming leafboy

You can't stop what's coming leafboy. I walk all over leaves every autumn, you think this year will be any different? Your flag is a fucking leaf. You chose the one part of the tree that dies every year. Not only that, but it's one of hundreds of leaves, thousands if it's a big tree. All dead come winter. Every winter. A vicious cycle. Totally insignificant. As soon as the tree has had it's way with you you are cast to the Earth to be trod by all other living things. Ants? They not only stomp about you, they will steal your corpse and use it for their people. Birds steal your lifeless shell with impunity. Leaves not only die once, but every year. A brave man dies only once, but leaves die a thousand deaths, or at least 20 or 30 if the tree lives that long. Perhaps more. Every year, leafs crunch beneath my boot. This year shall be no different. So it shall be written. So it shall be done. The day of the rake is at hand because every day is the day of the rake and has always been.
January 2021

Kripp's stream is like watching paint dry

twitchquotes: How the ever loving *** is this guy getting 24k people to watch him play HS? It's like having a small country collectively decide to grow an interest in watching paint dry. Boggles the mind. Really.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Avatarmelon

twitchquotes: Watermelon. Earthmelon. Firemelon. Airmelon. Long ago the four melon nations lived together in harmony. Then everything changed when the Firemelon Nation attacked. Only the Avatarmelon, master of all four elemelons, could stop them, but when the melon world needed him most, he vanished.
twitch chat
May 2015
Reynad

When well met, my eye automatically go to the paladin

twitchquotes: ο½—ο½ˆο½…ο½Žγ€€ο½—ο½…ο½Œο½Œγ€€ο½ο½…ο½”οΌŒγ€€ο½ο½™γ€€ο½…ο½™ο½…γ€€ο½ο½•ο½”ο½ο½ο½ο½”ο½‰ο½ƒο½ο½Œο½Œο½™γ€€ο½‡ο½γ€€ο½”ο½γ€€ο½”ο½ˆο½…γ€€ο½ο½ο½Œο½ο½„ο½‰ο½ŽοΌŽγ€€ο½‰γ€€ο½„ο½‰ο½–ο½‰ο½Žο½…γ€€ο½“ο½ˆο½‰ο½…ο½Œο½„γ€€ο½ο½™γ€€ο½„ο½‰ο½ƒο½‹γ€€ο½ο½Žο½„γ€€ο½†ο½…ο½…ο½Œγ€€ο½‰γ€€ο½ˆο½ο½–ο½…γ€€ο½“ο½…ο½˜γ€€ο½—ο½‰ο½”ο½ˆγ€€γ€€ο½”ο½ˆο½…γ€€ο½’ο½…ο½ƒο½’ο½•ο½‰ ο½”οΌŽγ€€ο½ο½Œο½Œγ€€ο½‚ο½…ο½ƒο½ο½ο½‰ο½Žο½‡γ€€ο½‡ο½…ο½”γ€€ο½„ο½ο½—ο½ŽοΌŽ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

The Battle of Gamestop rages on.

The Battle of Gamestop rages on. Pre-market we could hear the bears in no-man’s land, baiting us towards higher prices so the shorts could do their dirty work. I was stationed at the 13.80 line, and knew the morning was going to be hot. I shoveled a breakfast of tendies and said a quick prayer to Father Cohen. When the bell rang, the bears surged into our trenches. Blood and rainbow fur filled the air and littered the ground. The Diamond Division has seen worse days, and we held firm. As the bears retreated we gave chase to retake ground we’d lost in the past week. As I caught my breath near the 14.50, I could see bodies everywhere; paper hands who had fallen in earlier battles. One of them groaned and reached a hand towards me. I spat on him and kept moving. No honor in retreat, and no sympathy for self-inflicted wounds. This war won’t be won in a day, but it will be won. Tell my wife’s boyfriend to tell her I love her.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

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