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3730 copypastas found.

Yuumi isnโ€™t so great?

twitchquotes: Yuumi isnโ€™t so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a champion with such skill expression and movement options in League? Yuumi puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a chamption with her skill and options in the game again. Riven breaks the game. Vladimir breaks the game. Yuumi breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.
twitch chat
May 2019

League of Legends

Now THAT is what I call RUSSIAN MEDDLING!

twitchquotes: Had a colonoscopy today. My doctor was actually Russian. Now THAT is what I call RUSSIAN MEDDLING! They put me to sleep w/ same stuff Michael Jackon used. When I woke up, I MOON-walked right out of the hospital!
twitch chat
June 2018

so you're italian? name every pasta

barbine, bavette, bigoli, bucatini, busiate, capellini, fedellini, ferrazzuoli, fettuccine, fileja, linguine, lagane, lasagna, lasagnette, lasagnotte, maccheroni alla molinara. maccheroncini di campofilone mafalde, matriciani, pappardelle, perciatteli, picagge, pici, pillus, rustiche, sagne 'ncannulate, scialatelli, spaghetti, spagetthi alla chitarra, spaghettini, spaghettoni, stringozzi, su filindeu, tagliatelle, taglierini, trenette, tripoline, vermicelli, ziti, anelli, boccoli, calamarata, campanelle, cappeli da chef, casarecce, casacatelli, castellane, cavatappi, cavatelli, chifferi, cicioneddos, conchiglie, creste di galli, fagioloni, farfalle, fazzoletti, festoni, fiorentine, fiori, fusilli, fusilli bucati, garganelli, gemelli, gnocchi, lanterne, lorighittas, macaroni, maccheroncelli, mafaldine, malloreddus, mandala, marrile, mezzani, mezze maniche, mezze penne, mezzi bombardoni, nuvole, paccheri, passatelli, pasta el ceppo, penne, penne ricce, picchiarelli, pipe rigate, pizzoccheri, quadrefiore, radiatory, ricciollini, ricciutelle, rigatoncini, rigatoni, rombi, rotelle, sagnette, sagneralli, sedani, spirali, strapponi, strozzaperti, testaroli, tortigiloni, treccioni, trenne, trofie, trottole, tuffoli, vesuvio, cencioni, corzetti, fainelle, fogile, d'ulivo, orecchiette, acini de pepe, alphabet pasta, anchellini, anelli, anellini, armonie, conchigliette, corquilettes, coralli, corallini, cuscussu, ditali, egg barley, fideos, filini, fregula, funghini, gianduietta, grano, gramigne, grattini, grattoni, margerthine, merletti, midolline, occhi di passero, orzo, pastina, piombi, ptitim, puntine, quadrettini, sorprese, stelle, stortini, tripolini, agnolini, agnolotti, caccavelle, canneloni, cappelletti, caramelle, casoncelli, casunziei, conchiglioni, culurgiones, fagottini, lumache, mezzelune, occhi di lupo, pansotti, ravioli, rotolo ripieno, sacchettoni, tortelli, tortelloni, tufoli, canederli, donderet
November 2021

Vegan prison

twitchquotes: Attention Kripp: As a friendly vegan lawyer, you need to inform chat this is 100% sellout stream. If you want to stay away from vegan prison where meat is stuffed into all new inmates, inform chat now.
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

voting booth inspection is not required

twitchquotes: So I was waiting in line to vote when all of a sudden this voting "official" came up to me and said that there was something wrong with my voter registration and asked me to follow him to the back. When we went around back he said that I had to take off my pants and show my cock because penis size is the most accurate way to confirm voter identity. Because I thought he was a voting official I swiftly removed my pants and underwear to show him my member. After he fondled it for a bit he said it was good and I could go back into the line. It was only after I voted I realized that he forgot to check my balls too!!! He was obviously not certified to check such an area and I immediately contacted the security guards about his presence. Please do not fall for any tricks like I did! stay safe and happy voting!
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

I once knew this man. He was from the ocean

twitchquotes: I once knew this man. He was from the ocean. He did very Ocean-y things. He took me by the hand to take me to the land that you understand. He was the crust of a tan man imbibed by the sand, Soaking up the thirst of the land. Soaking up the thirst of the land. His Shin was in the shape of an "O". Don't know what to call him though...any ideas?
twitch chat
June 2017

if u finish reading this monkaW

twitchquotes: Hey Byron, I noticed you like to run comps around Aurelion Sol and I went ahead and did the math on a level 3 Aurelion Sol with Spear of Shojin and Zeke's buff and it turns out that if you finish reading this everyone in chat will be dead in the next 5 minutes monkaW
twitch chat
July 2019
Reckful

Teamfight Tactics

Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum?

Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum guys? My parents stumbled on this sub the other day and now I'm not even allowed to access Reddit anymore because of the sex talk they saw in here. This is not a peepee, poopoo and vajayjay fun house. We are not heathens whose only role in life is to fornicate and laugh about fornication and then ejaculate that nonsense, spurting and spewing this so called "humor" on each other like animals. This is a place of worship. Meme worship. God is not pleased with you all. Repent.
January 2021

Trolling My Office With Among Us (Part 5, Finale 2)

That's right. I am the IMPOSTER. I just killed my boss. I now had to convince everyone that I wasn't the imposter. "Chad is the imposter!" I randomly yelled out. Another coworker said "Well, I did see him running towards the stairs/elevator. "Wait, think about this!" Chad stated. "How do you know I'm the murderer? It could be him!" "Hmm.." My coworker, John, said. "Why do you think it's him, Darrius?" "Well," I started, "The same reason as you. I saw him running towards the elevator when the killing happened. "Wait, wait, wait!" Angelica proclaimed. "How do we know it happened on the top floor?" Another coworker, Adam, pointed out the window towards the paramedics wrapping up my boss' mangled corpse in a body bag." Oh!" Angelica said." That's a bit sussy," I said. "I think it must have been Angelica, she's pretending she doesn't know anything?" "Hmm, you might be right." My coworker Dave spoke up. "But I think that it might be you, Darrius." "Wait woah woah, why is it me?" I defended myself. He said "I saw you enter the elevator right before the murderer hit!" He said. Shit. he's onto me." Woah, you could be lying! I was in my cubicle doing my office work!" I yelled back." Oh really, what were you doing?" Dave said." I was uh.. scanning for viruses on my computer!" "Hmm.. okay." "I think that we should get rid of Liam." Angelica proclaimed. "Woah woah woah, pretty lady! Why do you think that?" He quickly hopped to his defense. "I haven't been a part of this discussion at all!" "Well, you're pale, and you work on the closest floor to the boss." Angelica replies. "Yeah, that's sus, Liam." I said. "We should get rid of him." "I agree." Chad said." Me too!" Adam said." Me three!" John said. And so we decided to throw him out the window.
March 2021

Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes

twitchquotes: Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes. They had no fire, so they threw one of the cigarettes overboard, and the entire boat became a cigarette lighter.
twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad

Soju special starter kit

Soju special stater kit โœ” already won the game โœ” This lobbyโ€™s playing for second โœ” This is my last loss โœ” I win out from here โœ” My board is too lit โœ” HP is fake โœ” Iโ€™m about to spike hard โœ” Thatโ€™s a fake loss โœ” 20hp? Thatโ€™s 3 lives โœ” This game is over โœ” We win out โœ” We're actually scaling โœ” last loss โœ” it's a fast 9 โœ” going eif
July 2022
k3soju

Teamfight Tactics

Bullish market makes me hard

When the stocks ๐Ÿ“Š๐Ÿ“ go up ๐Ÿ“ˆ๐Ÿ’ธ, my dick goes too ๐Ÿ†โฌ†๏ธ๐Ÿ˜ณ. Bullish ๐Ÿ‚ market ๐Ÿฌ makes me hard ๐Ÿฆด๐Ÿ’ฆ. All the countries ๐Ÿณ๏ธ๐Ÿด๐Ÿดโ€โ˜ ๏ธ๐Ÿ๐Ÿšฉ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ณ try to recover ๐Ÿ”„ from corona ๐Ÿฆ  so the money ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ต๐Ÿ’ธ flows ๐ŸŒฌ into my pocket ๐Ÿ’ณ. Soon ๐Ÿ”œ there will be a crash ๐Ÿ“‰๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿ˜– and the bears ๐Ÿป will crawl ๐Ÿšผ out of their holes ๐Ÿ•ณ. Then they cut off my greedy dick โœ‚๏ธ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿฉธ if I donโ€™t โŒ eat โ€™em out ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ˜ธ. I must turn into a bear ๐Ÿ‚โžก๏ธ๐Ÿป and make ๐ŸคŒ๐Ÿผ more money ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ต๐Ÿ’ธ and eat some honey ๐Ÿป๐Ÿฏ. When Iโ€™m done โœ… Iโ€™ll throw a party ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿท๐Ÿพ and eat your ass ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘.
October 2021

Emoji Pasta

WallStreetBets

Wealthy businessman from the land of Kantito

twitchquotes: Hello my name is Redito I am wealthy businessman from the land of Kantito. I come to watch the tipp stream becaus i want 2ba master. I must ba master of all pokemonarino or my boss "giovanito" will fired me from my businessman job and the helixito will be sad. plz no caparino fettuccine alfredini jigglypuforoni
twitch chat
July 2014
TwitchPlaysPokemon

I thought fidget spinning was a dumb trend

twitchquotes: I thought fidget spinning was a dumb trend, but then I got mine. I felt the spin, I felt it on my finger, I felt the rush of a good spin. It changed me. I got my spinner ironically, but I was wrong. Its amazing, I'm smarter, more productive, more focused at work, a simple task is now much better. Outsiders dont get it, they dont get us. I'm not saying were better but were more open minded and probably smarter. I love this community, and I love this way of life.
twitch chat
June 2017

Fidget Spinner

Iโ€™m paying to shoot like Wardell not Whiffdell

๐Ÿ“žHello?๐Ÿ“žIs this the OP Academy?๐Ÿ“žI would like a refund please๐Ÿ“žIโ€™m paying to shoot like Wardell not Whiffdell๐Ÿ“žHe do miss๐Ÿ“ž
June 2021
WARDELL

Valorant

Hey reckfulโ€™s brain, reckfulโ€™s chat here

twitchquotes: Hey reckfulโ€™s brain, reckfulโ€™s chat here. The way you make reckful sad all the time is not very cash money of you. I donโ€™t think itโ€™s very considerate of you to make reckful feel this way. He already has a hard time with being bipolar, why are you so mean to reckful? I try to make him happy but you do not make it easy. Reckful is a good guy and doesnโ€™t need you in his head all the time making things harder. Fix your chemical imbalance brain, it will make everyone feel better.
twitch chat
August 2019
Reckful

Response to "who gives a shit"

Well you see, if you didn't care you wouldn't have said "Literally no one gives a shit" in the first place. If you truly did not care, you would of completely ignored the conversation from the very start. The fact that you said that just shows the childishness inside of you. All that saying "no one gives a shit" does is make you out to be an entitled, lower person who craves attention by trying to seem cool. Even if you do not care about this statement, the mere fact that you are saying "no one gives a shit" says a lot about you. And shows that you are in fact an unlikable individual. Regardless of if you care of not, these are goddamn facts, and facts do not care about your little peabrained fucking pissbaby feelings. No amount of not caring will change your unlikableness. Nobody will forget this moment and it'll be embedded into our minds for months, even years. Grow up a little before even thinking about responding to another innocent person with "No one gives a shit".
April 2022

The year is 2037. Ligma is now the name of a real disease

The year is 2037. Ligma is now the name of a real disease. You're a doctor you just got the test results of the patient it's just as you feared it's fatal, your patient has ligma you're crying but you can't stop laughing you know you have to tell your patient that he has ligma but you can't keep a straight face you have to go out therr and tell your patient that he has only three days left to live and that there's no cure no hope not even enough time for him to finish his bucket list or find love or get the life he's always wanted he started making progress, he was doing well, his future had high hopes but he has a fatal case of ligma and you can't keep a straight face you walk out to your patient, "s-sir," you say through snickers "yes doctor? what are my test results?" your patient replies "I-I'm very sorry to say but," you respond as your sentence gets interrupted by a loud snort. "it's f-f-atal." you can't hold your laughs and you let out a bit of laughter "Is this some kind of joke? are you some sadistic creep? why the fuck are you laughing" the patient shouts out you "you h-have a fatal case of l-l-ligma," you can't hold it in anymore, you burst out laughing, you're rolling on the floor, tears in your eyes, you pee yourself a little "what the fuck is wrong with you? you're horrible! fuck you! go to hell!" your patient replies, with a face of horror, disgust, anger and sadness. he starts to cry. he's shaking you scream at the top of your lungs, "LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! LIGMA BALLS!" you can't stop laughing and shouting, over and over again you repeat "LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS! LIGMA BALLS!" your patient flees, he runs as fast as he can soon the police come, they handcuff you and put you in the back of a police car. you don't know what's going to happen to you now, but you know it won't be good
August 2021

Kripparian here with VEGAN FACTS

twitchquotes: Hi guys Kripp here with VEGAN FACTS! Did you know that milk is literally !Worse Than Hitler! and also killed many people during the Twitch Chat-ocaust in the 1940's? If you drink milk your bones will be as frail as Reynad's Rag RNG and you'll basically be Leifman's brother. Well, that's all for today's vegan facts! Bye guys! BRO FIST!!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Joker fursona bodyguard

twitchquotes: Okay CLEARLY sakurai is playing favorites already wtf. Joker is literally bayo, cloud, olimar put together. He gave him a GUN for gods sake and you LMFAO you canโ€™t even hurt his fursona bodyguard ohmygod
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

Text-to-Speech Playing