[Copypasta] Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum?

Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum guys? My parents stumbled on this sub the other day and now I'm not even allowed to access Reddit anymore because of the sex talk they saw in here. This is not a peepee, poopoo and vajayjay fun house. We are not heathens whose only role in life is to fornicate and laugh about fornication and then ejaculate that nonsense, spurting and spewing this so called "humor" on each other like animals. This is a place of worship. Meme worship. God is not pleased with you all. Repent.
January 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Dex sits in a huge doghouse

twitchquotes: A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a huge doghouse. Full and content because of his "kibbles and bits" diet, he's too happy to move. He's so happy, and enjoys life. He knows his owner has hope of a 12 win run. He knows he could draw attention to himself, since he's the king of his house. In a single act of pride, Dex barks to give Kripp his praise. "Good boy Dex" is his response.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

Call of Duty is the most realistic video game with the most advanced engine

Meanwhile in Call of Duty, true gamers laugh about Battlefield's primitive physics engine. Arma was an attempt by a failing Czech developer to make Call of Duty 'more realistic'. However due to the fact that Call of Duty was already as realistic as a video game can possibly be, they panicked. They made a shameless rip-off and slapped 'military simulator' on the front. True gamers are smart enough to know this, hence why Arma averages 67 on Metacritic, whereas Call of Duty averages 98-100. Call of Duty players laugh down at players of every other game, knowing they are Call of Duty rip-offs. Call of Duty is the most realistic video game with the most advanced engine. The world's leading video game scientists have confirmed this, so it isn't as much 'thinking' as it is 'knowing'. And Call of Duty can't possibly RIP those games off. Call of Duty was the first video game, so there wasn't anything for it to rip off.
August 2021

Call of Duty

Octavian Morosan

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–’ โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’
ascii art
March 2015
Kripp

All becoming better than Kripp

twitchquotes: ๏ผท๏ฝˆ๏ฝ…๏ฝŽ ๏ผซ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ ๏ฝ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ™, ๏ผฉ ๏ฝ—๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ” ๏ฝ”๏ฝ ๏ฝ“๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝ— ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ ๏ฝ๏ฝ™ ๏ฝ‹๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ฝ—๏ฝŒ๏ฝ…๏ฝ„๏ฝ‡๏ฝ…. ๏ผฉ ๏ผฃ๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝƒ๏ฝ‰๏ฝš๏ฝ… ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ ๏ฝ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ‰๏ฝŒ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝ…๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ ๏ฝ”๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ‚. ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ…๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡ ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ…๏ฝ”๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝ’ ๏ฝ”๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ’๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

Please stop spaming gachiGASM and gachiBASS

twitchquotes: Chat. My son is watching [insert streamer here]. Please stop spaming gachiGASM and gachiBASS . It's not good for a kid to see that. He might be curious about tasting a glorious *** in the future. I dont want that.
twitch chat
September 2020

KappaPride

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