[Copypasta] Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum?

Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum guys? My parents stumbled on this sub the other day and now I'm not even allowed to access Reddit anymore because of the sex talk they saw in here. This is not a peepee, poopoo and vajayjay fun house. We are not heathens whose only role in life is to fornicate and laugh about fornication and then ejaculate that nonsense, spurting and spewing this so called "humor" on each other like animals. This is a place of worship. Meme worship. God is not pleased with you all. Repent.
January 2021
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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According to all known laws of TFT, there is no way a Soju should be able to fast 9

According to all known laws of TFT, there is no way a Soju should be able to fast 9 with this board. Its gold are too small, and its comp is not stable. The Soju, of course, goes fast 9 anyway because Soju doesn't care what humans think is a fast eif.
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Hang out in an MSN room

twitchquotes: Hiyo there krippery pip! Philo here, just wondering if you'd ever wanna hang out in an "msn" room as the young folks like to call it, anyway please get back to me old pal ol buddyo, heres my fax! 0512 341 301
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Valiant calls Shanghai

twitchquotes: HELLO SHANGHAI πŸ“ž 4Head IT'S THE VALIANT πŸ“ž 4Head WE'LL TAKE IT FROM HERE πŸ“ž 4Head
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March 2019
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Type !69 to activate

twitchquotes: β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬ imGlitch You've been gifted a sub. Type !69 to activate β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬β–¬
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James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
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December 2018

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Text-to-Speech Playing