[Copypasta] Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum?

Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum guys? My parents stumbled on this sub the other day and now I'm not even allowed to access Reddit anymore because of the sex talk they saw in here. This is not a peepee, poopoo and vajayjay fun house. We are not heathens whose only role in life is to fornicate and laugh about fornication and then ejaculate that nonsense, spurting and spewing this so called "humor" on each other like animals. This is a place of worship. Meme worship. God is not pleased with you all. Repent.
January 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

My mom took away my Xbox

twitchquotes: My mom took away my Xbox. This is the saddest moment in my life. The most pain and unimaginable suffering I have ever felt before. Have I been a bad boy? Is that why she did what she did? I don’t know. I have so many questions. I also have depression because of lack of Xbox. I can’t play Minecraft. I love Minecraft so so much, it’s my favorite game in the entire world. Why would she take such joy and happiness away from me? Does she think I do bad things on there? If so, she should know that I join good Christian Minecraft servers only. That’s it.... I give up. I can’t fr*cking take another painful second of this anymore. This torture is what has been depressing me for so long. I swear to h**k, I’ll get that Xbox back if it kills me.
twitch chat
December 2018

Brofist and crofist

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, I am a lawyer and I represent StrifeCro. I notice that your 'brofist' is strikingly similar to StrifeCro's 'crofist'. Given that StrifeCro owns the 'fisting' patent, I request that you immediately cease and desist from 'brofisting' any more subs, or my client will take you to court. Yours sincerely, Eddie Barristerino.
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

AYAYAWeird

⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿⡟⠋⠄⠄⠄⣀⡿⠄⠊⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⠇⠄⢀⠃⠙⣿⣿ ⣤⠒⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⠄⢀⠊⠄⠄⠈⢿ ⣿⣠⠤⠴⠶⠒⠶⠶⠤⠤⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠃⠄⠂⣀⣀⣀⡀⠄ ⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢎⠐⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛ ⡇⠄⠄⠄⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠎⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⡧⠶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠲⠦⣭⡃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣾⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⠶⠄ ⡇⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⢀ ⡇⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⢊ ⢠⠄⠈⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⡦⠁⠄⠄⣼ ⢸⠄⠈⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿ ⢸⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠉⠄⢸⣿ ⠄⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿ ⠄⢿⣷⣶⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿ ⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
July 2019

Weebs

Win any online argument by replying with this

Don't care + didn't ask + L + Ratio + soyjak + beta + cringe + stfu + cope + seethe + ok boomer + incel + virgin + Karen + 🤡🤡🤡 + you are not just a clown, you are the entire circus + 💅💅💅 + nah this ain't it + do better + check your privilege + pronouns in bio + anime pfp + 🤢🤢🤮🤮 + the cognitive dissonance is real with this one + small dick energy + 😂😂🤣🤣 + lol copium + snowflake + 🚩🚩🚩 + those tears taste delicious + Lisa Simpson meme template saying that your opinion is wrong + 😒🙄🧐🤨 + wojak meme in which I'm the chad + average your opinion fan vs average my opinion enjoyer + random k-pop fancam + cry more + how's your wife's boyfriend doing + Cheetos breath + Intelligence 0 + r/whooooosh + r/downvotedtooblivion + blocked and reported + yo Momma so fat + I fucked your mom last night + what zero pussy does to a mf + Jesse what the fuck are you talking about + holy shit go touch some grass + cry about it + get triggered
November 2021

Reddit

Trump wakes up with a scream and hugs his stuffed bear

twitchquotes: Trump wakes up with a scream and hugs his stuffed bear, "I just had the most awful dream, I was about to be tucked by Kibler!" Trump's bear replies, "That wasn't a dream." As Trump recoils in horror, Kibler smirks, "It seems I'm about to tuck Frump."
twitch chat
June 2015
Trump
Text-to-Speech Playing