[Copypasta] I sexually Identify as the "I sexually identify as an attack helicopter" joke

I sexually Identify as a Lamborghini

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as a ＬＡＭＢＯＲＧＨＩＮＩ. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of ＤＲＩＶing ＵＰＨＥＲＥＩＮＴＨＥＨＯＬＬＹＷＯＯＤＨＩＬＬＳ. People say to me that a person being a ＬＡＭＢＯＲＧＨＩＮＩ is Impossible and I’m ＭＡＴＥＲＩＡＬＩＳＴＩＣ but I don’t care, I’m this ＮＥＷＬＡＭＢＯＲＧＨＩＮＩＨＥＲＥ. I’m having a plastic surgeon install , 7 ＮＥＷ bookshelves and ２０００ｎｅｗｂｏｏｋｓ on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “ＮＥＷＬＡＭＢＯＲＧＨＩＮＩＨＥＲＥ” and respect my right to ＤＲＩＶＥＵＰＨＥＲＥＩＮＴＨＥＨＯＬＬＹＷＯＯＤＨＩＬＬＳ. If you can’t accept me you’re a ＬＡＭＢＯphobe and need to check your ＧＮＡＷＬＩＤＧＥ. Thank you, and I'll see you on my website.

twitch chat

October 2016

I sexually Identify as

I sexually Identify as an LGM-30 Minuteman III

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as an LGM-30 Minuteman III intercontinental ballistic missile. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of delivering a W78 nuclear warhead with an explosive yield of 3x500 kilotons of TNT anywhere on the planet at Mach 23. People say to me that a person being a Minuteman III is impossible and I’m incredibly destructive but I don’t care. I’m having Air Force Global Strike Command install new three-stage solid-fuel rocket engines and give me an $86 billion upgrade on my 59 foot body. From now on I want you guys to call me "ICBM" and respect my right to be in service until at least the 2030s. If you can’t accept me you’re missileophobe and need to check your local AFB for missile silos. Thank you, and I'll see you in WW3.

twitch chat

May 2017

I sexually Identify as

I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of seizing the means of production from the dirty bourgeoisie. People say to me that a person being a historical communist revolution is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon instal hammers, sickles, and other assorted proletariat farming tools on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Comrade" and respect my right to seize the means of production and free the working class. If you can't accept me you're an oppressor and need to check your capitalist privileges. Thank you for being so understanding.

twitch chat

June 2017

I sexually Identify as

I sexually identify as a priest player

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as a priest player. Everyday I dream about flying into ranked games and conceding to rank 25 players. Call me retarded. I don't care. I'm beautiful. I'm getting plastic surgery to get my minions silenced for 2 mana. You can now refer to me as Anduinn and respect my right to concede on turn 1. If you can't accept me you're a holy-phobe and need to check your concede privileges. Thank you for being so understanding.

twitch chat

August 2016

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

I sexually Identify as Kripp

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as Kripp. Ever since i was a boy , I dreamed about playing kid's card game while complaining about RNG for a living. People say that being kripp isn't possible I'm ****** Retarded , but I don't care ,I'm beatiful. I'm having a crappy computer setup installed in my house , along with marrying a woman I can force to do all my cooking so I can complain twice as efficiently , If you don't accept me you're a Krippophobe and need to check your Krippileges

twitch chat

May 2016

Kripp

[Copypasta] I sexually Identify as the "I sexually identify as an attack helicopter" joke

I sexually Identify as

I sexually Identify as

I sexually Identify as a Lamborghini

I sexually Identify as

I sexually Identify as an LGM-30 Minuteman III

I sexually Identify as

I sexually Identify as the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917

I sexually Identify as

I sexually identify as a priest player

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

I sexually Identify as Kripp

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

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