[Copypasta] I sexually Identify as TheLegend27

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as TheLegend27. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the armies of my enemies hurling big, hard boulders at disgusting cavalry. People say to me that a person being TheLegend27 is Impossible and I’m *** retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install Game of War: Fire Age, trebuchets and 90kg stones on my body.
twitch chat
January 2017

I sexually Identify as

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More I sexually Identify as Copypastas

I sexually identify as Microsoft Windows 10

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as Microsoft Windows 10. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over PCs dropping hotfixes on braindead users. People say to me that a person being Windows 10 is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install Cortana, Windows App Store and a keylogger on my system. From now on I want you guys to call me “Windows Update 10.0.10586” and respect my right to update from above and update needlessly. If you can’t accept me you’re a windowphobe and need to check your OS privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
May 2016

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I sexually Identify as an LGM-30 Minuteman III

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as an LGM-30 Minuteman III intercontinental ballistic missile. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of delivering a W78 nuclear warhead with an explosive yield of 3x500 kilotons of TNT anywhere on the planet at Mach 23. People say to me that a person being a Minuteman III is impossible and I’m incredibly destructive but I don’t care. I’m having Air Force Global Strike Command install new three-stage solid-fuel rocket engines and give me an $86 billion upgrade on my 59 foot body. From now on I want you guys to call me "ICBM" and respect my right to be in service until at least the 2030s. If you can’t accept me you’re missileophobe and need to check your local AFB for missile silos. Thank you, and I'll see you in WW3.
twitch chat
May 2017

I sexually Identify as

I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of being misplayed during tournaments and silencing the incorrect cards. People say to me that a person being an owl is ridiculous and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a genetic engineer put ironbeak owl DNA into my body, equipping me with feathers, beaks, and the power to silence others. From now on I want you guys to call me "Owlsen" and respect my right to silence from above and silence needlessly. If you can't accept me you're an owlphobe and need to check your animal privilege. Thank you for understanding.
twitch chat
March 2015

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

Kripp please stop wearing sexually suggestive clothing

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, I think your arena results would be better if you focused more on your gameplay and less on wearing sexually suggestive clothing
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

I sexually Identify as

I sexually identify as You

Hi, my name is whatever yours is and I sexually identify as you. I use I/me/myself pronouns. If you’re wondering “Won’t that get you confused with me?” you are a transphobic bigot because I clearly stated that I identify as, and therefore am, you. By saying that I can get confused with you, you are implying that I am not you, and denying that I’m you is transphobic because you are denying my gender identity, and also your own because I am you. If you are now wondering “Doesn’t that make you also a transphobe?” then I will answer. No, it does not. ❤️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️
January 2021

I sexually Identify as

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