[Copypasta] I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of being misplayed during tournaments and silencing the incorrect cards. People say to me that a person being an owl is ridiculous and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a genetic engineer put ironbeak owl DNA into my body, equipping me with feathers, beaks, and the power to silence others. From now on I want you guys to call me "Owlsen" and respect my right to silence from above and silence needlessly. If you can't accept me you're an owlphobe and need to check your animal privilege. Thank you for understanding.
twitch chat
March 2015

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Hearthstone Copypastas

Kripp play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go!

twitchquotes: Privyet, Komrade Kripp! Is your cousin Dmitri from Mother Russia! I am of hearing that you make much moneys by playing simplistic card game for toddlers and whining like little baby in front of thousands of simpletons! BLYAT! You should play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go! Already I am recruit by man with enormous forehead for professional team Tampon Storm and will be winning many tournaments, yes! Don't be a cyka, you capitalist pig, and stop crying like baby! Love, Dmitri.
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

Can we all stop hating on Amaz for a moment?

twitchquotes: Can we all stop hating on Amaz for a moment? I mean, yes, he is a colossal fake cunt, moneysucking parasite, and selfish prick. But he is one of the few representations of the gay community in Hearthstone.
twitch chat
June 2015

Hearthstone

KappaPride

Kripp, this is Lucky Sanders!

twitchquotes: Oh my god, Kripp, I've finally found you! This is Lucky Sanders! We served together in 'Nam, remember? I was the field medic in your squad! Man, I remember how you used to always volunteer to take out those Charlie sharpshooters even though I said I could handle them with my M60. "Never, Lucky," you would say. "You're too valuable to the squad." I saw you swim through stream after stream, leaving a trail of dead snipers behind you. Thank you, Kripp. You fought that war perfectly.
twitch chat
January 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Teddy Roosevelt messages Kripp

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, This is Teddy Roosevelt calling! I am concerned that you have formed a monopoly on the hearthstone section of twitch dot telly. You must renounce this darkness immediately or I will SMITE YOU like I did Andre Carnegie and Nelson Rockemsockem. You must give up your monopolistic ways or face the mighty wrath of the White House and the US Judicial system. Much love to Rania and the baby. Regards, yo boi TD
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

PJSalt = Hs²

twitchquotes: Albert Einstein was desperate. He tried to prove that the luck of Kripp's opponents was within the laws of mathematics. Critics laughed claiming bad luck is divine punishment for embracing casualness. On his deathbed, he spent his last seconds jotting down the most famous formulas, PJSalt = Hs²
twitch chat
May 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing