[Copypasta] I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of being misplayed during tournaments and silencing the incorrect cards. People say to me that a person being an owl is ridiculous and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a genetic engineer put ironbeak owl DNA into my body, equipping me with feathers, beaks, and the power to silence others. From now on I want you guys to call me "Owlsen" and respect my right to silence from above and silence needlessly. If you can't accept me you're an owlphobe and need to check your animal privilege. Thank you for understanding.
twitch chat
March 2015

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Hearthstone Copypastas

Hearthstone cardback

β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–„β–€β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆ
July 2015

Hearthstone

Our Salt Lord who art in Canada. Kripparian be thy name

twitchquotes: Our Salt Lord who art in Canada. Kripparian be thy name. Thy Bad RNG come. Thy topdecks be done. On Arena as it is in Ranked. Give us this day our daily rant. And forgive us our button presses as we forgive those who don't press theirs against us. For thine is the never lucky. The bullsh*t RNG. Forever and ever. Ameno.
twitch chat
April 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Tired of getting Sniped?

twitchquotes: Tired of getting Sniped? No problem! Here at Sniper Deflectorsβ„’ we can shield your Arena Queue from incoming Snipers with our new patent-pending SniperShieldβ„’ Technology! Our shield will bounce incoming sniper shots right back to the sniper-guild recruiter (definitely not DRIVEZY), causing them to effectively Snipe themselves! Buy 24/7 protection now for only $24.99/month!
twitch chat
August 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

First, some perspective. I'm a PURIFY-PRIEST player

twitchquotes: First, some perspective. I'm a PURIFY-PRIEST player. If you don't know what that is, it's not important, just know it's a deck I'm very passionate about and that I've played for three years now. That's right, I've played the same deck for the years, and it's never gotten stale. Why? Because the enjoyment comes from mastering the deck, from fine tuning my decision making, my sequencing, from learning how to play around the latest and greatest shenanigans.
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Another extremely unjust loss

twitchquotes: Once again, Kripp, you suffer another extremely unjust loss. I have no idea why you keep losing game after game, even though you possess superb drafting and world-class card game decision making skills. There's clearly something not right and I'm betting that someone at Blizzard may be a little jealous of you.
twitch chat
September 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing