[Copypasta] I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as an Ironbeak Owl. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of being misplayed during tournaments and silencing the incorrect cards. People say to me that a person being an owl is ridiculous and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a genetic engineer put ironbeak owl DNA into my body, equipping me with feathers, beaks, and the power to silence others. From now on I want you guys to call me "Owlsen" and respect my right to silence from above and silence needlessly. If you can't accept me you're an owlphobe and need to check your animal privilege. Thank you for understanding.
twitch chat
March 2015

Hearthstone

I sexually Identify as

Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Hearthstone Copypastas

I feel Kripp fisting me through the stream

twitchquotes: Every morning, I wake up only to watch Kripp play Hearthstone arena. I decide to subscribe to Kripp, join the '5-dollar club', to be part of Kripp himself. 'Welcome', Kripp exclaims, 'to the 5-dollar club!'. He gives the stream a brofist. I feel Kripp fisting me through the stream. A silent tear of joy escapes my eye.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Kripp BMs an opponent in Hearthstone

twitchquotes: Hey guys, I want to tell you about a terrible experience I had. I'm a 12 year old boy, I'm quite a nice guy but I've had a rough time lately. My dad left us a few years ago and my mom beats me. I'm very shy and I am bullied at school. Anyways, I played Hearthstone to take my mind of all this stuff. I played Kripp and he said I was a "Mind-blowingly bad hunter", "This guy is a garbage human being", and he said that I'm "a super shit person". He hated me so much and this makes me very sad. :(
twitch chat
July 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

Anduin and Uther

twitchquotes: Anduin is standing outside, looking through the window. He sees how Ben Brode SCAMAZes Tyrande. A small tear runs down his face. "Since Tyrande is the new Priest hero, nobody will ever fulfill my wishes and desires..." A muscular hand lays down on Anduin's shoulder. He turns around and gasps. It's Uther, the Lightbringer himself. "Don't worry, I will make sure you will get my Blessing of Might". Anduin's sorrow immediatly vanishes as he is about to receive his blessing. Uther smirks and reveals his 5/3 Assbringer. "Wow..." Anduin says. Uther slams his Assbringer into Anduin's 1/1 Lightspawn. "Well Played" Uther yells as he Consecrates all over Anduin's face. "BY THE HOLY LIGHT!"
twitch chat
October 2016

Hearthstone

Kripp play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go!

twitchquotes: Privyet, Komrade Kripp! Is your cousin Dmitri from Mother Russia! I am of hearing that you make much moneys by playing simplistic card game for toddlers and whining like little baby in front of thousands of simpletons! BLYAT! You should play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go! Already I am recruit by man with enormous forehead for professional team Tampon Storm and will be winning many tournaments, yes! Don't be a cyka, you capitalist pig, and stop crying like baby! Love, Dmitri.
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

Sorry, I've dropped my DREADSTEED DECK

twitchquotes: โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ Sorry, I've dropped my DREADSTEED DECK โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ Sorry, I've dropped my DREADSTEED DECK โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜ โ™ž โ™˜
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

More Hearthstone Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing