If that's not his knee then wha...
twitchquotes:
If that's not his knee then wha... oh my... 
twitch chat
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
18 streamers found.
21 tags found.
3730 copypastas found.
Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)
I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
Classic
WallStreetBets
why would you NOT immediately tell everyone who killed you?
twitchquotes:
So uh. If you're playing Among Us. On a voice call. And you're killed... why would you NOT immediately tell everyone who killed you? Isn't the goal to win if you're crew? Like if you're not gonna tell people on the voice call, why keep doing tasks? What's the point of using the voice comms at all? You're still in it when "dead". To me if a fucking person doesn't use it when they're dead they're throwing. I'd 100% tell my team who killed me if I was killed. The point is for the crew to find out who the impostor is. If you're part of the crew, you should be telling them if you know. If you're not going to do that, you're literally int'ing and throwing. So then why bother doing tasks if you don't want to win? End discussion.
twitch chat
Among Us / Amogus
NA SPAMMING CHAT FROM AIRPORT KEKW
twitchquotes:
NA SPAMMING CHAT FROM AIRPORT KEKW NA SPAMMING CHAT FROM AIRPORT KEKW NA SPAMMING CHAT FROM AIRPORT KEKW NA SPAMMING CHAT FROM AIRPORT KEKW NA SPAMMING CHAT FROM AIRPORT KEKW NA SPAMMING CHAT FROM AIRPORT KEKW
twitch chat
Riot Games
League of Legends
EU vs NA
LCS, aka "Lowest Championship Series"
twitchquotes:
LCS, aka "Lowest Championship Series", is a League for Riot Games that is often ridiculed for it's ARAM games and questionable Pyke and Jayce games. It is specifically known for it's losing in the fastest international Best of Five
twitch chat
Riot Games
EU vs NA
KKona boy I was at that darn there
twitchquotes:
boy I was at that darn there hootenanny shindig gitten down on some damn there squaredancin, when a fine belle asked me for a dance. Couldn't see nuthin, the damn barn dint have no damn light fixtures. But I knew she was prettier than fresh cooked stew from mama. Boy I tell you, I said yes faster than a one legged gator on a tractor boy I tell you. Once we had a darn tootin time in that darn there doe-see-doe, i took er out 'hind the hay bales. Mmm boi I tooker pants off faster than a hot knife through butter yessir. Lets just say i gave er the ol' Tennessee One Two. We both laid down right there on the spot mmmmboy. Held er nice an tight til mornin light. Opened my eyes and I couldnt believe what I saw! It was my damn sister the whole darn time. I aint opposed to it
boy I was at that darn there hootenanny shindig gitten down on some damn there squaredancin, when a fine belle asked me for a dance. Couldn't see nuthin, the damn barn dint have no damn light fixtures. But I knew she was prettier than fresh cooked stew from mama. Boy I tell you, I said yes faster than a one legged gator on a tractor boy I tell you. Once we had a darn tootin time in that darn there doe-see-doe, i took er out 'hind the hay bales. Mmm boi I tooker pants off faster than a hot knife through butter yessir. Lets just say i gave er the ol' Tennessee One Two. We both laid down right there on the spot mmmmboy. Held er nice an tight til mornin light. Opened my eyes and I couldnt believe what I saw! It was my damn sister the whole darn time. I aint opposed to it
twitch chat
Pewdiepie is being held captive by T-Series
twitchquotes:
āATTENTIONā ļø9ļøā£YR OLDSš¶š», WE NEED UR HELPš£! PEWDIEPIEšøšŖ IS BEING HELDš”CAPTIVEš BY āæT-SERIESšļøAND CAN ONLY BE RELEASEDš IF U SMASH šØTHAT SUBSCRIBE š
±ļøUTTONšš»ANDšš» TURN ON THE BELLš! TIMEš IS TICKING, LETSā³āļø š¤š»BRO FIST T-SERIESš¤š» AND GET THE EPIC š„VICTORY ROYALš©š©š°
twitch chat
Emoji Pasta
If you watch good anime, you're a real anime fan
twitchquotes:
Imagine thinking as long as you watch anime, you're a anime fan, lol what a joke. There are levels to this, if you watch bad anime and have bad taste, you're not a real anime fan. If you watch good anime and have good taste like me, you're a real anime fan. Truth hurts. #anime
twitch chat
Weebs
Type !69 to activate
twitchquotes:
ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ 
You've been gifted a sub. Type !69 to activate ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬
You've been gifted a sub. Type !69 to activate ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬ā¬
twitch chat
forsenLUL
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ā ā ā£“ā”ā ā£°ā£æā£æā£æā£æā£¤ā£¤ā£ā”ā æā æā£æā£æā£æā£æā£æā£æā£æā£æā£·ā£æā£æā£æā£æā£æ
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Forsen
Emote
DAPPER NO
mellow why are you so cute 
Why isn't NA in Worlds?
twitchquotes:
Hey guys Iām new here. But isnāt this a Worldwide league of legends championship? I think Itās really unfair that there arenāt any NA teams, why isnāt such a huge, skilled, representative portion of the playerbase not participating?
twitch chat
Riot Games
League of Legends
Mr. Morosan's deceptive practices
twitchquotes:
Twitch Chat (āChatā) respectfully submits this memorandum of law in support of its motion to enjoin Octavian Morosan (ānl_Krippā) from distributing false and deceptive advertising for his stream. The "nl" of Mr. Morosan's streaming identity refers to "no life." This is a blatantly deceptive and demonstrably false claim as it can be qualitatively determined that Mr. Morosan does indeed have a life. The Lanham Act merits an injunction preventing Mr. Morosan's deceptive practices.
twitch chat
Kripp
Twitch Viewbot Premium Package
twitchquotes:
Hello, thank you for ordering the Twitch Viewbot Premium Package for $550 which will last 2 months and end on 8/13/17. This subscription will have your chat enter life-like messages that are believable and you'll never be suspected! Here are some examples: 
how do you play this game? 
what game is this? Additionally, upgrade for another $50 and earn the message: 
STRIMMER TURN THIS DUMB SHIT OFF
Hello, thank you for ordering the Twitch Viewbot Premium Package for $550 which will last 2 months and end on 8/13/17. This subscription will have your chat enter life-like messages that are believable and you'll never be suspected! Here are some examples: how do you play this game? what game is this? Additionally, upgrade for another $50 and earn the message: STRIMMER TURN THIS DUMB SHIT OFF
twitch chat
Viewbots
I'll do it. I'll stream Final Fantasy
twitchquotes:
Kripp is chained to the chair, sobbing as the man hacks at his face with a razor. He cries as the last bit of his beard is cut away, sapping him of his Romanian gypsy powers. "Please don't hurt her. I'll do whatever you want" says Kripp. The man with the razor laughs and says "Are you ready to accept the deal? Or do we need to hurt Pupparian?" Kripp shakes his head. "I'll do it. I'll stream Final Fantasy." 
twitch chat
Kripp
Second breakfast
twitchquotes:
"Rania, where's my breakfast?" asks the Kripp. "You already had it!" she replies. "Yes, I've had one, but what about second breakfast?" asks the Kripp. As Rania walks away, Kripp is startled. "I don't think she knows about second breakfast," Kripp panics, "What about brunch, elvensies, afternoon falafel?"
twitch chat
Kripp
This is Noah Legerino, CEO of Never Legend Incorporated
twitchquotes:
Hello Kripparino, this is Noah Legerino, CEO of Never Legend IncorporatedĀ©. As you may already know, we are requiring you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp (has legend) as you no longer are a "never legend". This was stated in the contract you signed under section 6 article 9 paragraph 420. This is to be enforced immediately.
twitch chat
Kripp
Fast forward computer time to open TGT packs
twitchquotes:
fast forward computer time to August 26 2015 so you can open TGT packs everyone copy pasta this so reynad can see
fast forward computer time to August 26 2015 so you can open TGT packs everyone copy pasta this so reynad can see
twitch chat
Reynad
Hearthstone
fortnite should add a pregnant female skin
I think fortnite should add a pregnant female skin. Every kill she gets she slowly gives birth. When in water blood comes out. At 10 kills she gives birth and the baby can be your pet. Thoughts? Fortnite should hire me yošš
Fortnite
I think the balance team is doing an amazing job
twitchquotes:
I think the balance team is doing an amazing job at keeping the game fun to play and interesting to watch! ($5.00 has been sent to your PayPal account, please delete this part of the message)
twitch chat
OverwatchLeague