[Copypasta] KKona boy I was at that darn there

twitchquotes: KKona boy I was at that darn there hootenanny shindig gitten down on some damn there squaredancin, when a fine belle asked me for a dance. Couldn't see nuthin, the damn barn dint have no damn light fixtures. But I knew she was prettier than fresh cooked stew from mama. Boy I tell you, I said yes faster than a one legged gator on a tractor boy I tell you. Once we had a darn tootin time in that darn there doe-see-doe, i took er out 'hind the hay bales. Mmm boi I tooker pants off faster than a hot knife through butter yessir. Lets just say i gave er the ol' Tennessee One Two. We both laid down right there on the spot mmmmboy. Held er nice an tight til mornin light. Opened my eyes and I couldnt believe what I saw! It was my damn sister the whole darn time. I aint opposed to it KKona
twitch chat
October 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Honestly, that's what I call a cool story bro

twitchquotes: Honestly, that's what I call a cool story bro. Such a riveting tale, I honestly copy and pasted it to word, saved on my hard drive, backed it up on a jump drive, drove to the bank, put the jump drive in the safe deposit box, and will leave it there until my kids turn about 12 (when they can actually state their age, and ask what it is I'm showing them), when I will pick it up, put it in an old USB drive reader and relay this cool story to them and tell them, "kids, this is what a cool story should look and sound like...not like the stories your generation tells.
twitch chat
April 2020

Classic

Why did I marry this angry bald internet man?

twitchquotes: It’s 11 p.m. and i've finally gotten comfortable in bed. It's been a long day and finally being able to get some rest is such a luxury. But my peace is soon broken as my husband shouts from the other room "OH COME ON! That was such BULLSHIT! Fucking highrolled AGAIN." Why did i do this to myself. Why did I marry this angry bald internet man? I haven't slept properly in months for his constant yelling throughout the night. God help me.
twitch chat
September 2020
Kripp

forsenIQ

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣤⣤⣤⣀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠙⠛⠄⣾⡏⠉⠙⢿⣷⣄⠘⢿⣿⣿⡿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⣴⡇⢀⠄⠹⣷⣄⠄⠄⠻⣿⣆⠘⠿⠟⠁⠈⠄⠄⠁⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿ ⠁⣠⡀⠁⠄⣿⡇⢺⣧⠄⡹⣿⣦⡀⢀⣿⣿⠄⢠⣴⣦⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙ ⠸⢿⣷⡀⠄⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⡟⠊⠛⠿⡿⡿⠋⢀⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣤⡀⠹⣿⣦⢹⣿⣿⠛⢻⣷⣄⠄⣠⣤⡤⢖⣿⣯⣄⠙⢿⣿⣦⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣷⡄⠙⢿⣷⣍⠁⢠⡀⠛⠉⡠⣿⣿⡿⣶⣌⡛⠛⠿⣦⣙⢿⣷⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⢻⣿⠖⠄⣿⣶⢋⣾⣿⣿⣿⣎⢿⣿⣿⣶⣄⠉⠣⠘⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⡘⣇⣈⣿⣿⡟⣾⡟⠋⣛⡛⠿⠆⠄⢡⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣉⣉⣩⣾⠏⣰⣿⣿⠏⠑⡀⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⣀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⢸⣿⣿⠿⠯⠘⡿⠿⠁⢐⢿⣿⣿⣷⣶⠇⠄⠄⣀⣶⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⠛⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣵⣽⡛⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠈⢸⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

twitch removed Κappa

twitchquotes: twitch removed Κappa FailFish
twitch chat
August 2019

Salt season pass

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Don salteroni from Sodium enterprises, we would like to remind you to renew your season pass as soon as possible if you would like to continue receiving daily shipments of table salt, best regards Don salteroni. pls no PJSalt
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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