[Copypasta] KKona boy I was at that darn there

twitchquotes: KKona boy I was at that darn there hootenanny shindig gitten down on some damn there squaredancin, when a fine belle asked me for a dance. Couldn't see nuthin, the damn barn dint have no damn light fixtures. But I knew she was prettier than fresh cooked stew from mama. Boy I tell you, I said yes faster than a one legged gator on a tractor boy I tell you. Once we had a darn tootin time in that darn there doe-see-doe, i took er out 'hind the hay bales. Mmm boi I tooker pants off faster than a hot knife through butter yessir. Lets just say i gave er the ol' Tennessee One Two. We both laid down right there on the spot mmmmboy. Held er nice an tight til mornin light. Opened my eyes and I couldnt believe what I saw! It was my damn sister the whole darn time. I aint opposed to it KKona
twitch chat
October 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Hello this is Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon

twitchquotes: Hello this is Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazonโ„ข. As many of you know, we have recently bought over "Twitch tv". Users must now buy 'Emotes' such as " Kappa ", " Kreygasm " and " FrankerZ ". If users proceed to use these emotes without buying and owning them, we will have to, not only remove the account of the user but also, shut down the stream we have evidence that is has been used in. Thank you, do not copy and paste this. This is business, kid.
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie

8th year without variety

๐Ÿ“œ โœ Sadge ๐“œ๐”‚ ๐“ญ๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ฎ๐“ผ๐“ฝ ๐“ซ๐“ป๐“ธ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ๐“ป, ๐“ฝ๐“ธ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ถ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ด๐“ผ ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ 8๐“ฝ๐“ฑ ๐”‚๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ป ๐”€๐“ฎ ๐“ฑ๐“ช๐“ฟ๐“ฎ ๐“ฑ๐“ช๐“ญ ๐”€๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ฝ ๐“ฟ๐“ช๐“ป๐“ฒ๐“ฎ๐“ฝ๐”‚. ๐“ฆ๐“ฎ ๐“ถ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ท๐“ธ๐“ฝ ๐“ซ๐“ฎ ๐“ช๐“ซ๐“ต๐“ฎ ๐“ฝ๐“ธ ๐“ฎ๐“ท๐“ญ๐“พ๐“ป๐“ฎ. ๐“Ÿ๐“ต๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ผ๐“ฎ ๐“น๐“ป๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ฏ๐“ธ๐“ป ๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ป ๐“ผ๐“ช๐“ต๐“ฟ๐“ช๐“ฝ๐“ฒ๐“ธ๐“ท. .
February 2021
Forsen

Please do not type in chat unless you are high ELO

twitchquotes: Please do not type in chat unless you are high ELO (silver 2 and above) FailFish Let's have a high quality chat please
twitch chat
May 2017

League of Legends

wow this chat is so immature

twitchquotes: wow this chat is so immature, i can't even imagine how you are able to live in real life. Spamming nonsense 24/7. real viewers trying to learn from the game can't focus on the players and their decisions. please stop
twitch chat
June 2019

I hate Twitch Chat

AITA for slapping a stand-up comedian who dissed my wife?

AITA for slapping a stand-up comedian who dissed my wife? Okay, little background. My (53M) wife (50F) has a medical condition called Alopeca Areata, which basically means she has excessive hair loss, and is currently bald. My relationship with my wife wasn't stable over the years, and I've caught her cheating on me multiple times, but we've pulled through. Anyway, we went to an awards show and usually there is a comedian who hosts the show and makes jokes at everybody (in a good way). The comedian was a guy we know (and he knew us), and we had a really good time. At one point, he mentioned me and my wife and I was happy he acknowledged us. But then, he took a jab at my wife about her condition, which I thought was way out of line, but I laughed out of embarrassment. My wife, on the other hand, was not laughing at all and rolled her eyes. At that moment I knew I had to stand up for her. I got up on stage, smacked the sh*t out of the guy, and went back to my seat. The comedian was shocked and really wasn't expecting my reaction. He wanted to keep talking about my wife but I shouted at him to stop. Usually I don't curse, but I was really pissed about the whole situation. My friends could see I was upset and during the break they came to comfort me, but other people think I'm the asshole. What do you think?
April 2022

Am I The Asshole?

Will Smith Slap

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