[Copypasta] KKona boy I was at that darn there

twitchquotes: KKona boy I was at that darn there hootenanny shindig gitten down on some damn there squaredancin, when a fine belle asked me for a dance. Couldn't see nuthin, the damn barn dint have no damn light fixtures. But I knew she was prettier than fresh cooked stew from mama. Boy I tell you, I said yes faster than a one legged gator on a tractor boy I tell you. Once we had a darn tootin time in that darn there doe-see-doe, i took er out 'hind the hay bales. Mmm boi I tooker pants off faster than a hot knife through butter yessir. Lets just say i gave er the ol' Tennessee One Two. We both laid down right there on the spot mmmmboy. Held er nice an tight til mornin light. Opened my eyes and I couldnt believe what I saw! It was my damn sister the whole darn time. I aint opposed to it KKona
twitch chat
October 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Dennis in a time machine

twitchquotes: The year is 1945. “Dennis,” Kripp speaks breathlessly into the night. “Get back to the time machine. We have what we need here.” A foul smirk plays upon his lips as he pockets a top-secret Nazi folder marked “Top Deck.” Lightning flashes and thunder crashes far across the German mountains. “We will see who says "Salt" now,” he says….
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Shroud

⠄⠄⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⢰⡾⠛⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⣀⣤⣤⣴⣦⣠⣄⣀⠄⠄⠄ ⠋⠁⣠⣄⣴⣶⠶⠶⠶⣦⡜⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠃⠁⡀⠄ ⣷⣾⣿⠟⠁⡀⠄⠄⢀⠄⠁⠈⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠰⠿⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠊⠄ ⣿⣿⠃⣀⣘⣓⣤⣤⠈⠁⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⡿⡤⠄⣈⣠⣄⣉⣉⡉⢉⣂⣀⣠⣤⠑ ⣿⣽⣾⣿⣿⣟⣩⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡈⢷⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⢸⣬⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠈⠛⠁⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣭⣴⣾⣾⣋⣀⣠⠤⠐⢺⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣼⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣀⡀⠄⠉⢿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⡈⢉⣼⣿⣿⡿⠿⠽⠻⠧⠄⠛⢛⠊⠉⠓⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⠇⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡡⣷⣾⠟⠉⣠⣦⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡷⡇⠄⠄⢀⡠⢀⣿⠓⣼⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⣿⣥⠄⠈⠙⠋⠄⣀⣉⣉⡉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⢴⣿⣷⣿⣿⢂⠿⡟ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⡦⠤⣤⣭⣤⠄⠂⢀⢠⡤⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⡸⠂⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣶⢛⠟⠿⡿⡉⣁⡂⠸⢿⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄
December 2018
shroud

Ban one 12 year old, get the whole 9gag

twitchquotes: :tf: BAN :tf: ONE :tf: 12 :tf: YEAR :tf: OLD :tf: AND :tf: YOU :tf: GET :tf: THE :tf: WHOLE :tf: 9GAG :tf:
twitch chat
February 2017

MODS

Classic

Ban X Get The Whole Y

SCP Jerma

Item #: SCP-985-J Object Class: Euclid Special Contain Procedures: SCP-985-J must be kept in a standard humanoid containment cell decorated to look like an average American household with a live video feed. SCP-985-J must be fed BrainFluud once every 6 hours for sustenance. Personnel assigned to SCP-985-J must refrain from using the words "Short Streamer" "Late" "Loud Pee" and "Bald" as this can agitate SCP-985-J, causing it to enter an enraged state. SCP-985-J is allowed access to one (1) Garfield comic strip per day for entertainment. Description: SCP-985-J is a 32 year old Caucasian male from Boston, MA. SCP-985-J refers to itself as "Jeremy Elbertson" and believes itself to be much taller than it appears to others, referring to itself as being "not tiny" and "compact". SCP-985-J was discovered by the Foundation on ██/██/201█ when footage emerged of it attacking and killing [DATA EXPUNGED]. MTF Gamma-43 ("Anti-Jerms") was dispatched to secure the anomaly and all civilians who had viewed the footage were amnesticized.
January 2022
Jerma985

Kripp gets married in a shack

twitchquotes: Rania: "why are you playing Diablo 3, Kripp? How can we afford Big Fat Greek Wedding with 5k Diablo viewers?" But the Kripp doesn't listen. He plays Diablo 3 and loses all his viewers and gets married in a shack.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp
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