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128 copypastas found.

How to win any Internet argument

May 2021

The Girl you just called fat? She shit herself & lost 15kgs

The Girl you just called fat? She shit herself & lost 15kgs. The Boy you just called stupid? He shit himself. The Girl you just called ugly? She spends hours shitting and farting. The Boy you just tripped? He shit his pants. There's more to people than you think. Like this if your against bullying.
March 2021

Hearthstone vs MTG Online

twitchquotes: Tbh, this game is too boring for anyone to understand. Hearthstone is already boring enough to the extant that pretty much no one can sit through it unless youre at a professional level. This is just to unfathomably boring. I know this is an indie game, but seriously if anyone think that this garbage can compete with an older game like HS, youre mistaken.
twitch chat
March 2018

Hearthstone

Having a son might be more cucked than a daughter

Atleast by having a daughter you can guarantee your bloodline. Plus its a fact that daughters are more biologically inclined to love and respect their fathers. Those whores you see on the internet all suffer from daddy issues aka absent father. A daughter with a present father usually turns out ok. I say its more cucked because biologically mothers are closest to their sons. Now imagine this. You and your wife are older and she thinks you can't satisfy her anymore, then she views pretty much a younger healthier version of you in their son. Now imagine being cucked by your own son, that shit has to be insanely brutal. Atleast wiith your daughter you can get some action, but with your son you cant plus you risk being cucked. Daughters in their younger years always prefer being around their dads. Which is why i say daughter>son. Plus daughters are usually more agreeable with their fathers unlike sons who want to bash heads to show who is the alpha in the household.
June 2021

NSFW

Am I The Asshole for not being able to trade options for my dad? I’m 6.

This started about 4 years ago when I was 2 years old. My dad started to supplement me picture books and cartoons with beginner options books and Martin Shkerli's live videos on how to pick pharmaceutical stocks. Over the course of these years I have retained absolutely nothing even though my dad has spent every waking minute trying to make me understand. He has done almost everything including having Jerome Powell's speeches play while I am sleeping and only having Warren Buffet on the TV to try and make me understand the market. Yesterday, he got to a breaking point when I couldn't differentiate between a straddle and a strangle even though we went through different strategies for almost a month straight. My dad finally convinced my mom that they were doing the right thing when he said that I will soon be a Wendy's worker begging my wife's husband for a weekly allowance because I will never amount to be anything. He couldn't fathom raising a kid who was not able to able to make a profit from trading options by the time he was 10. With all that said, if anyone wants a 6 year old child who is shitty at market strategy, plz adopt me from Eternal Sunny Orphanage in Omaha, Nebraska.
September 2021

WallStreetBets

Am I The Asshole?

Ho Lee Fuk

twitchquotes: Hello, my name is Ho Lee Fuk and i are fromm Chinaland Father say i need become doctor and make her proud but i chose become HS player like Reckful. Father not happy with choice and told commit sudoku but i know i make right choice. Sorry i no speak propeller engrish and pls no coppy pasterino dongerino frappucino cappucino al pacino
twitch chat
March 2014
Reckful

God I want Winston's fat hairy ass on me right now

twitchquotes: God I want Winston's fat hairy ass on me right now. FeelsBadMan I want his scientist ape body all over me every day, it brings me to orgasmic relief that he could yell "OH YEAH" or "THE POWER OF SCIENCE" to me at anytime. moon2GASM If Activision Blizzard made Winston sexdolls I would buy them all for myself and never leave my mom's basement. Winston is so fucking smart, I want him to teach me science and I'll teach him about fetishes. Fuck I just want Winston to be real. FeelsBadMan 🔫
twitch chat
June 2017

Overwatch

Citizens of Dalaran!

twitchquotes: Citizens of Dalaran! Raise your eyes to the skies and observe! Today our world's destruction has been averted in defiance of our very makers! Algalon the Observer, herald of the titans, has been defeated by our brave comrades in the depths of the titan city of Ulduar. Algalon was sent here to judge the fate of our world. He found a planet whose races had deviated from the titans' blueprints. A planet where not everything had gone according to plan.
twitch chat
July 2017

President's Day Emoji Pasta

🎉HAPPY🥳PRESIDICKS🍆😫DAY😛💦2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣ years ⏱ago 🗓our 👏👏fav😍pounding🧈👊🏻😘 father 👴🏻🍆💦and😌main🥺💯bitch💁‍♀️🤭WHOREge😎WashingSLUT🥳💅🍾came💦💦into👉👌this🌎WORLD🌍to ✌️becum💦 🤫the🇺🇸1ST🇺🇸presiDICK😢🍆🤞of👏🥳the💅United🇺🇸Sluts👙Of🤭America🇺🇸🏳️‍🌈send📧📲this➡️to 🔟of😉the😩sluttiest🍑💦💦patriots🔞👙🇺🇸you👇know🤗if you get 🔟 back😏😏you’re👏invited to the ✍️📝constitutional 📝✍️COCKus🍆💦 if you get 5️⃣ back 🤭🤣💁‍♀️ you’re a Mt. Rushmore 🗻👨🏻‍🦳WHORE🍆🍑👙💦if you 👤get 0️⃣ back 💔😹no 🚫 presidick🍆💦 for 🤭you 😭👨🏻‍🦳🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
March 2022

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

Holiday

What the fuck did you just fucking say about OTM FDs

What the fuck did you just fucking say about OTM FDs, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated bottom of my class in the Special Needs Division of the Navy Seals, and I've been bag holding from pump n' dumps on WSB since 2012, AND I have over 300 confirmed margin calls. I am trained in the 'tism and I'm the top retard in the entire United States armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another normie retail investor. I will wipe out my portfolio with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit about OTM FDs over the Internet? Think again, fuckface. As we speak I am contacting my wife's network of boyfriends across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your portfolio. Your fucking 401k is dead, kid. I can trade anywhere, anytime, and I can lose fat stacks over seven hundred ways, and that's just with TSLA FDs. Not only am I extensively trained in sniffing glue, but I have access to the entire crayon collection of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass boomer stocks off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit crayon diarrhea all over you, the likes of which would make even Jackson Pollock jealous, and you will drown in it. You're fucking done, kiddo.
September 2021

WallStreetBets

Navy Seal

A scholar hates twitch chat

The myriad of idiosyncratic atrocities bestowed on this chat from these juvenile delinquents have caused a monstruous amount of turmoil and I cannot fathom this type of malignancy. These futile behaviors have abruptly penetrated the purity of my dear soul.
June 2021

copy: pastad

gamer head: on knuckles: cracked gaming goggles: on arms: stretched gamer girl pee: drinked girlfriend: none gay best friend: invited wife: beaten wife: cheated on daughter: abandoned child: destroyed your mom: fucked rockets: launched funding: secured anime: loved Japan: nuked HIV: positive blood: donated American genocide: denied milf: hunted milfs: lewded babies: yeeted emerald splash: deflated society: segregated Israel: destroyed heroin: shot milk: consumed mother: donuted father: robbed identity: hidden traitor: kakyoined Italian drug trade: monopolized masters: awaken Caeser: killed left wing: destroyed lib: owned hog: cranked pants: shid bottom: text top: text Hotel: Trivago Hotel: Mario Duke: Nukem cer: armic balls: crushed balls: ligma the imposter: sus sussy: balls Gucci: gang Delivery: Digiorno Peterbilt: gassed Half: life pog: gers Vaporeon: cool :) edit: spelling
August 2021

All hail Kripparrian of the House TSM

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ Hear, hear. All hail Kripparrian of the House TSM, the First of His Name, The One With No Life, King of Wraeclast, Prince of the Docks, Papparrian of the First Men, Emperor of the Great Sarn Sea, Breaker of DeSync, and Father of Cattarian, RIP, First and Last of His Name. ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Called my overweight female friend a heckin chonker today and now she won’t talk to me

My female friend was crying about how fat she was and I was trying to comfort her by telling her that she didn’t look that fat but she kept accusing me of lying to make her feel bad so I thought that saying “maybe your just a heckin chonker” would cheer her up and lighten the mood but she just looked at me and left. I hope she realised that I was only being nice and that she is being irrational.
August 2021

2018 MONTHLY PLEB TEST

twitchquotes: PLEASE COPY PASTE THIS FOR YOUR MONTHLY PLEB TEST: raniaEZ ? amazW ? krippW ? eloiseE ? trumpW ? savjzW ? reynadW ? toastyW ? kolentoW ? reckWut ? bajW ? btsKotlW ? dewW ? emjaneW ? forsenW ? thijsULU ? omgYay ? eslGob ? mitchW ? lirikThump ? qtpHAHAA ? singsingFcuk ? bjergW ? sodaW ? btsGodzW ? liftGasm ? goldyW ? taymooW ? rtzW ? admiralW ? envySwag ? wtrWtR ? danFat ? merliniPolice ? sumE ? fluffyW ? ratW ? purpleCx ? tyler1C ? syndiRage ? Pleb test passed
twitch chat
October 2018

So you're going by "Trihex" now nerd?

twitchquotes: So you're going by "Trihex" now nerd? Haha whats up douche bag, it's Bradley from PE Class. Remember me? Me and the guys used to pick you last in kickball. Sorry you were just complete trash lol. I can see not much has changed. Remember how everyone would back up when I got up to the plate? Yeah, that's because I have a fat cock and super saiyan legs. Everyone still respects me because I was born an ultimate chad. I guess some things never change huh loser? Nice catching up lol. Pathetic...
twitch chat
January 2021
trihex

Voluteering at a Food Bank

twitchquotes: Hey Imaqtpie! I'm gonna volunteering at a Food Bank soon. Thanks for playing a fatty Yasuo game to teach me the tips on feeding! Thanks in advance and God bless
twitch chat
August 2017
imaqtpie

Forsen how DARE you miss lethal

twitchquotes: Forsen how DARE you miss lethal. You are a pro gamer. I look up to you as my hearthstone mentor, perhaps even as a father figure. My dad wouldn't miss lethal, and neither should you...
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

It's not gay with socks on

When I was 13 years old a buddy of mine tried to convince me to fool around. I wasn't into it, and he told me it's not gay if you're wearing socks. I didn't believe him, went home, and asked my dad. That's 'gentleman's gay', hardly gay at all. Don't see it much these days. The 50s were a different time. What were we to do? We were typical boarding school boys, rich with vigor, skin slick with drying sweat and gritty earth from a game of pigskin. At night our young, virile bodies filled the dorm with sweet-musky vapors, like game-meat stewed with apple and peppercorn. You'd awake in darkness to the hushed, melodic rhythm of two pairs of white tube socks, barely visible in moonlight, bouncing on the hardwood floor. The deep bond of male friendship played like a thousand different human instruments. The wet claps of skin on skin, the gentle thud of heads on backboards, frenzied cries in the throes of climax. Wilbur, so fat and soft like tapioca pudding. His breasts were so like the real thing, what we fantasized of our future wives. Unwilling, defenseless Wilbur, so slow and uncoordinated in the dark. 10 of us would glaze his bare, pink flesh like a giant raspberry danish. He once had the audacity to tell Headmaster Redford. But Redford was a Deerfield boy once, he understood. So he joined us on our midnight hog hunts. Through college and years after we'd find time here and there, away from the wives at a family lake house. But it's been decades now - the times have certainly changed. If you wanted to do something private with another man, in your socks, it wasn’t ‘gay’. It was just two men, celebrating each other's strength.
August 2021

"Just one more" Kripp muttered

twitchquotes: "Just one more" Kripp muttered, as the sun slowly rose over the Canadian horizon. His forehead dripping with Vegan sweat, his eyes droopy with fatigue, Rania at the door with suitcases of her stuff and signed divorce papers, and Dex a mere pile of starved bones, Kripp once again clicked the Queue button with Ashka at the ready. "This time I'll get MVP for sure."
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Battlerite

Text-to-Speech Playing