[Copypasta] A scholar hates twitch chat

The myriad of idiosyncratic atrocities bestowed on this chat from these juvenile delinquents have caused a monstruous amount of turmoil and I cannot fathom this type of malignancy. These futile behaviors have abruptly penetrated the purity of my dear soul.
June 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Trump wakes up chained to the wall

twitchquotes: Trump wakes up chained to the wall of a small room with Kripp standing over him. Orange Juice begins pouring from the walls, quickly filling the space. Trump screams in horror as he struggles to get free. Kripp walks out, shuts the door and sits down to begin his stream, the white wall of the death chamber visible behind him for all his viewers to see
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

Blockchain NFT Gaming

The year is 2030. It's a rainy Saturday afternoon. You've just finished mining 30 obsidian ore playing Crypto Crush Saga, a match-3 mobile game. You open up The Elder Chains Online and feel a rush of excitement. Your school buddy has spent years becoming a Master Blacksmith, and he has agreed to turn 10 obsidian into an Obsidian Battlestaff, a HUGE upgrade over the Mithril Mace you’ve been wielding for the last months. It’ll take him an hour or so. In the meantime, you log into Clash of Guilds, and use the remaining obsidian to upgrade your town hall to the next level. That should keep your village safe for now. You wish you could fast forward time to tonight. Your Guild has plans to go for a deep run into the wilderness in Old School Rune Chains, and your prospects of a successful run (and great loot) have never been better. All guild members have been spending the past 2 weeks grinding for better weapons, and you’ve agreed (through a vote) to use the Guild treasury to buy everyone a new full set of Red Dragonhide Armor. Tonight’s objective is to kill the level 128 Frost Giant hiding in the Cave of Sorrow. He has a 5% chance of dropping an Immaculate Orb of Brilliance, of which there are currently only 4 in existence. The Orb can be used as a power source in an upcoming space exploration game, and should give your guild a great advantage in reaching distant galaxies first. A 5% drop rate is low, but you’re feeling optimistic. In the distance, you hear a faint 'BloCkChAIn doEsNT bRiNg AnYtHiNg nEW tO gAmES'. You shrug, and join your friends in the Discord voice channel. Life is good.
July 2022

Cryptocurrency

NFTs

We Wish You A Merry Christmas

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠻⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⠈⣿⡄⠘⣿⠀⠀⣾⠿⠿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣆⠈⣷⣤⣿⢁⣴⡚⠒⢂⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠶⠁⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⠿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⣷⣄⠀⢸⡿⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⢰⡆⠰⣶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣦⠸⣧⠈⢿⡄⢸⡇⠀⠛⠭⢉⠉⠈⣷⣠⣿⣶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⡄⢹⢦⡼⠃⣾⠇⢾⣶⣶⡾⠃⠉⣿⡍⢹⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠋⠀⠀⣀⣠⣤⡀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠈⠉⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣶⡄⢶⣆⠀⢸⣿⡁⠘⣧⠀⢰⣿⠃⣼⡆⠀⣿⢿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⠘⣿⡀⢸⣯⠁⢠⡇⠀⣿⠃⢰⡿⠀⢰⣿⣨⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡦⠺⣧⠀⠙⠓⠋⠀⠀⠿⠔⢹⡇⠀⠛⣿⠉⠀⠙⠃⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣦⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠈⠉⠀⢀⣠⣤⣤⠀⠘⣿⡇⣠⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⡄⠀⣌⠁⣠⣶⠿⢷⠄⢠⢶⡛⠛⣿⠇⣴⢟⠋⢙⡿⠁⠀⣼⠇⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⢿⢁⣼⡿⠀⢙⣧⠄⢂⡀⠀⣸⠓⣎⠁⠀⠃⢻⡗⢯⡀⠀⠐⡛⢒⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⡏⢸⡟⣽⡇⠀⣿⣤⣶⡿⠃⠀⠛⠀⡿⠀⠀⠀⢿⡇⢸⣧⠀⠸⣷⠼⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤⡀⠀⠈⠁⠈⠁⠻⠧⠀⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⣠⣴⠶⠶⢠⣶⣶⣦⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⡇⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⢿⠏⠀⠀⡿⢀⡷⠀⣠⡴⠾⣷⠜⡇⠀⢉⠀⢒⣤⠀⠀⡾⠉⣋⠀⣤⠐⣶⢯⣼⡇⢴⣿⠿⠛⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⠃⠈⠁⠀⢹⡗⣺⠷⠀⠋⡶⢔⡋⠀⣷⠀⠻⠿⠟⠋⠀⢸⡇⠀⡿⣆⣿⡇⠁⠀⠘⠇⢈⠉⠁⠐⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣄⣀⣼⡗⠈⠁⠛⠀⠀⠀⡷⠸⡧⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⣿⠹⡇⢿⡄⠀⠀⠰⣿⣶⣶⣾⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣄⡀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠋⠉⣿⣿⠀⣠⣶⣶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣾⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⠁⠙⠿⠿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
December 2021

People space jammed from the oldest of times

twitchquotes: From the oldest of times, people jammed for a number of reasons. They jammed in prayer... or so that their crops would be plentiful... or so their hunt would be good. And they Jammed to stay physically fit... and show their community spirit. And they Jammed to celebrate." And that is the Jamming we're talking about. Aren't we told in Psalm 149 "Praise ye the Lord Octavian. Slam Jam unto the Lord Octavian a new song. Let them praise His name in the Space Jam"? And it was King David - King David, who we read about in Samuel - and what did David do? What did David do? He jammed
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

FeelsOldMan

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣯⣭⣭⣝⣛⠿⢿⣛⣿⣛⣛⡻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣱⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⡭⠖⡑⢈⢿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣷⣭⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣱⣿⣿⡿⣻⣿⣯⣥⣿⣒⡽⡎⢚⣕⣛⠿⢿⣿⣿⡎⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣱⣾⣿⢫⣷⣿⣿⠛⣋⡍⣥⡴⣶⣶⣄⢖⢘⣽⣓⢒⡆⡴⣶⠖⣼⢻⣿ ⣿⡿⣳⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠑⠹⣃⣥⡶⣒⣒⠒⠮⠥⠌⡘⠫⠬⠕⢶⣋⠬⠟⡃⢿ ⡿⣭⣿⡋⢿⣿⣿⣿⣵⣵⡛⣯⢡⡥⠄⠄⢉⠉⣍⡑⡰⣀⣭⠍⠲⢀⠈⠹⡶⢸ ⢳⣽⡿⣿⣷⣜⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣲⡘⢧⣤⣶⣬⡶⢞⣡⢆⠻⣿⣦⣥⣶⣶⠶⣰⣿ ⣿⣸⣇⣿⣿⣿⡞⣾⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣶⠶⠶⠂⢾⣿⣶⣿⣓⠂⠄⠐⢀⠴⣾⣿⣿ ⡻⣯⢻⣽⣿⣿⢧⣿⡷⣿⡿⣫⣵⡷⣛⣯⣭⣟⡷⣯⣯⣷⣛⣛⡛⢶⣥⡘⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⣧⣝⣛⣣⣿⣿⡿⡑⣺⢿⢿⣿⢏⡵⡶⠋⣝⣻⣏⡐⠌⠻⣿⠆⣮⡻⡘⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡳⠔⠥⠡⠍⣀⡻⠿⠿⠷⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⢟⣊⢃⣰⣿ ⡽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣯⣻⢿⣿⣧⡹⡶⣤⣬⣝⣛⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⢟⣛⣛⢛⣼⣿⣿ ⠄⠙⠲⠭⣽⣛⣻⠿⢷⣿⣿⣷⢹⣽⣝⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣻⣽⢟⡿⣣⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠛⠛⠒⠒⠒⠺⣧⡟⣿⣿⣟⣿⣷⣧⣿⢟⡿⣱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣹⡟⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿⣾⣾⣳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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November 2021

Pepe

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