[Copypasta] A scholar hates twitch chat

The myriad of idiosyncratic atrocities bestowed on this chat from these juvenile delinquents have caused a monstruous amount of turmoil and I cannot fathom this type of malignancy. These futile behaviors have abruptly penetrated the purity of my dear soul.
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Scraggly vegan is the only one left

twitchquotes: BOB “You’re doing GREAT out there!” I exclaim with as much enthusiasm as I can this late in the day. The scraggly vegan is the only one left in the tavern, his attention focused entirely on the card game we put out to entertain children and toddlers. “I don’t wanna talk about it guys” cries the man, knocking his cup of vegan water over. I try to reassure him that everyone has bad luck now and then, but he just ignores me, as always. This tavern attracts some strange types indeed.
twitch chat
December 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

Our Salt, who art in hearthstone

twitchquotes: BlessRNG Our Salt, who art in hearthstone, hallowed be thy game, your kripparian comes, your aggro decks be done, on constructed as it is in arena. BlessRNG Give us today our daily meme deck. BlessRNG And forgive us our rng bullshit, as we also have forgiven others rng bullshit. BlessRNG And lead us not into Smorc, but deliver us from the evil aggro decks. Amen BlessRNG
twitch chat
December 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Slow mode, r9k mode, and randomly banning people, good job mods

twitchquotes: Boy, the mods in this channel have really done a bang-up job. When I first got here it was all cappuccino pasterino, but now that they're using slow mode, r9k and randomly banning people, we can finally have a productive chat without all the IDIOTS. Thank you, mods.
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

Torture dance 2

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣴⣧⣤⣴⡖⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠘⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢤⣴⣦⣄⣀⣀⣴⣿⡟⢿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠙⠻⠿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠈⢀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⠋⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣶⣿⣿⠿⢛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣶⣷⣿⣿⡉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠛⠟⢿⣤⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
April 2019

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Torture Dance

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

My dad works at twitch dude

twitchquotes: My dad works at twitch dude, he's a sr Vice President, and he oversees players accounts. If you don't unban me, I'll make sure he gets both you and majinphil permabanned. But if you unban me, I'll make sure you fit in the algorithms to always have Phil be in people's recommended feed. Your choice.
twitch chat
August 2017
Text-to-Speech Playing