[Copypasta] A scholar hates twitch chat

The myriad of idiosyncratic atrocities bestowed on this chat from these juvenile delinquents have caused a monstruous amount of turmoil and I cannot fathom this type of malignancy. These futile behaviors have abruptly penetrated the purity of my dear soul.
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

THINKING

twitchquotes: Every day rushing through my head, like a river that only runs red, Every night when I lay in my bed, I remember every word that you said, I try to stop myself from thinking, And yet I find myself sinking, Deeper and deeper, your lies blinking in my mind, Crushing the only inkling of hope I never knew I could find, On and on these horrible thoughts I can't stop myself, Pulled out of my head like some kind of deranged shelf, I just had anal sex with a gay elf
twitch chat
April 2019

KappaPride

I fucking hate gaming laptops

I fucking hate gaming laptops. Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.
January 2022

Gonna go against the grain here and say YTA

Gonna go against the grain here and say YTA. Honestly, what the fuck is wrong with you? I simply can’t fucking believe that you would make such an idiotic decision. You’re a disgusting little crawly lobotomite and you deserve to perish in a dark deep abyss where you belong. I’ve gone ahead and removed one reddit upvote from your account by β€œdownvoting” this comment. I hope you rethink your actions in the future. Fuck you.
August 2021

Am I The Asshole?

I was watching you play Prismata yesterday and fell asleep

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp. I was watching you play Prismata yesterday and fell asleep. In my dream I was playing prismata and fell asleep. The same thing happened in my dream's dream. It was the worst nightmare ever and I woke up in a cold sweat. Please don't play prismata anymore I don't want to go through that again. Pls no copy pastrami.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Dubstep

β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘ β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘
July 2015
Text-to-Speech Playing