[Copypasta] A scholar hates twitch chat

The myriad of idiosyncratic atrocities bestowed on this chat from these juvenile delinquents have caused a monstruous amount of turmoil and I cannot fathom this type of malignancy. These futile behaviors have abruptly penetrated the purity of my dear soul.
June 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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I have a 197 word essay due tomorrow

twitchquotes: fck my life!!! I have a 197 word essay due tomorrow and I have no idea where to start. Just WAIT till you kiddies have real homework, then we will see how much time you have to spam in here
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

I'm just a poor pasta maker

twitchquotes: I'm just a poor pasta maker struggling to make a living in this world. I may not be as fast as those big pasta factories with their fancy machines, but I am committed to providing you a quality pasta experience. I use only the freshest and dankest artisanal memes, and I can assure you that when you RIP in spaghetti, you'll never forgetti.
twitch chat
January 2017

You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic

twitchquotes: Alex19 isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a player with such an ability and movement with fox? Alex puts the game in another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see a player with his skill and passion for the game again. mang0 breaks records. Armada breaks records. Alex19 breaks the rules. You can keep your statistics. I prefer the magic.
twitch chat
October 2016

Super Smash Bros

I can't wait for you to be our new maid

twitchquotes: Hi Imaqtpie is Reginald Dinh here. I'm messaging to offer you a spot on my team. I think you'd fill the role very well, to be honest I don't know anyone in the scene who is better equipped. I can't wait for you to be our new maid.
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Obey the call of Kel'Thuzad!

twitchquotes: ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ　Ｍｉｎｉｏｎｓ，　ｓｅｒｖａｎｔｓ，　ｓｏｌｄｉｅｒｓ　ｏｆ　ｔｈｅ　ｃｏｌｄ　ｄａｒｋ，　ｏｂｅｙ　ｔｈｅ　ｃａｌｌ　ｏｆ　Ｋｅｌ’Ｔｈｕｚａｄ！ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

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