[Copypasta] How to win any Internet argument

Ok hillbilly person who supports genocide and pedophiles and war crimes and the Holocaust and the Rwandan genocide and 9/11 and incest and r**e and the Armenian genocide and Nazis and the Japanese interment camps and sterilizing immigrants and concentration camps and harvesting organs and mass shootings and human trafficking and totalitarian fascist regimes and Donald Trump saying "There were very fine people on both sides" and white supremacy and male supremacy and cis supremacy and hetero supremacy and the coronavirus pandemic and imperialism and bombing Syria and the drug war and the Crusades and the Holodomor and the January 6th capitol storm and slavery and World War 1 and World War 2 and diabetes and cancer and AIDS and Ebola and murder and rabies and police brutality and fatherless homes and motherless homes and segregation and Jim Crow laws and the Uyghur genocide and animal abuse and selling SpongeBob's soul for 62 cents and murdering babies and voter fraud and fascism and fatphobia and ableism and criminalizing homosexuality and bestiality and kids starving in the streets and saying slurs and cannibalism and banning everything in existence and wishing that all of life on Earth was extinct. Fuck you!
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Go to horny jail

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August 2021

Greetings Tyler1, I am the CEO of MacDonalds

twitchquotes: Greetings Tyler1, I am the CEO of MacDonalds, Big Mac-yler OpieOP . I am writing to you to see if you would be interested in working with us. We would like to harness the extreme amount of salt from your body and use it in our fries. Please reply ASAP.
twitch chat
May 2016
Tyler1

salty

I hate, hate, hate coffee culture

I hate, hate, hate coffee culture. I can't stand people saying, "Oh, I can't do anything until I get a warm cup of coffee in me." Shut up. Being a former smoker, I recognize the addiction and subsequent irritability of coffee drinkers and it bugs me to no end that caffeine gets glossed over as an addictive substance, or even fucking celebrated to some extent. Those people who brag about needing 5 expresso shots (sorry, esssspresso) a day need an intervention, not a nod of approval. Seriously, all you coffee drinkers are the biggest group of fucking enablers I've ever seen. When doing group activities, like camping, I loathe waiting for others to start their day after a morning ritual that hogs counter space, or propane, or dirties good clean water. I hate the sleepy look in peoples' eyes as they grasp their cup of stimulant that they wouldn't need had they never started drinking it in the first place. There's an entire fucking cupboard in my kitchen dedicated to stupid coffee mugs and their dumb sayings staring back at me despite living in a household where only one person drinks coffee. Why? And the dishes. Since nearly every person drinks coffee, inevitably us non-coffee drinkers are going to have to clean up after your morning fix. Seriously, I've done so many goddamned cleanings of coffee mugs if I had a dime for every one, I'd probably have enough for a Starbucks franchise. And don't even get me started on Starbucks. Godamned devil business slanging legal crack for decades, hogging good real estate so addicts have a place to slurp up and get their morning shit in before work. Lastly, I despise the amalgam of ways people cook up their black powder and then talk up the flavor as though it tastes like something other than a dirty sock. That's your addiction speaking. You want to know why you need to dump half an udder of cream in your cup? It's because cream is fucking delicious and when combined with your filthy water, makes it somewhat bearable. And your stupid machines that creak and groan through the quietude of my morning can go fuck themselves. Talk about a waste of counter-space. And the spent black stimulant granules that spill over onto the counter, staining the grout drives me nuts. And lastly, the goddamned keurig cups or whatever they're called are one of humanity's worst inventions, sandwiched between Glyphosate and Joe Rogan. At least the meth addicts don't deposit a plastic remnant that will persist in landfills for hundreds of years spreading micro-plastics into our environment every time they need to get high.
September 2021

M-mr Kripp could you p-please stop crying

twitchquotes: monkaS ☝️ m-mr kripp could you p-please stop crying
twitch chat
March 2017
Kripp

Destroy and obliterate the Economy of Turkey

twitchquotes: As I have stated strongly before, and just to reiterate, if Turkey does anything that I, in my great and unmatched wisdom, consider to be off limits, I will totally destroy and obliterate the Economy of Turkey (I’ve done before!). They must, with Europe and others, watch over the captured ISIS fighters and families. The U.S. has done far more than anyone could have ever expected, including the capture of 100% of the ISIS Caliphate. It is time now for others in the region, some of great wealth, to protect their own territory. THE USA IS GREAT!
twitch chat
October 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing