[Copypasta] Being a Karen is low key awesome as hell

Being a Karen is low key awesome as hell. You get to have sweet ass chunky highlights and drive a big hideous SUV you secretly eat 3 donuts a day in and dont report to weight watchers. You can go to your jazzersize class absolutely fucked up on airplane bottles of rum and a perc you got from your friend who has back issues. Call your daughter a whore in front of her friends when she's 12 then pretend not to remember it when she brings it up deeply traumatized in her 20s. Fucking boss bitch shit straight up. Just blasting "dude looks like a lady" max volume flooring it to a target to cause a ruckus returning a bath mat. Not giving a single shit if its problematic. You like it that way. Making your dumbass kids apologize to YOU when you say racist shit. Getting zooted on your strawberry nosed husbands blood pressure meds. Hell yes queen fucking slay.
March 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Sorry, I dropped my chess set

twitchquotes: โ™— โ™˜ โ™Ÿ โ™› โ™• โ™œ โ™ โ™ž โ™Ÿโ™™โ™— โ™˜ โ™Ÿ โ™› โ™• โ™œ โ™ โ™ž Sorry, I've dropped my chess set โ™— โ™˜ โ™Ÿ โ™› โ™• โ™œ โ™ โ™ž โ™Ÿโ™™โ™— โ™˜ โ™Ÿ โ™› โ™• โ™œ โ™ โ™ž โ™Ÿโ™™โ™— โ™˜ โ™Ÿ โ™› โ™• โ™œ โ™ž โ™Ÿโ™› โ™™โ™— โ™˜
twitch chat
September 2014
imaqtpie

Mesothelioma ad script

If you or a loved one was diagnosed with Mesothelioma you may be entitled to financial compensation. Mesothelioma is a rare cancer linked to asbestos exposure. Exposure to asbestos in the Navy, shipyards, mills, heating, construction or the automotive industries may put you at risk. Please don't wait, call 1-800-99 LAW USA today for a free legal consultation and financial information packet. Mesothelioma patients call now! 1-800-99 LAW USA
March 2021

Kripp after the power outage on December 21, 2013

twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

Imaqtpie submits his Pocket Pick

twitchquotes: Hi Mr Santana. Marc Merrill here. Your recent submission to our 'Pocket Pick' video series left us scratching our chins. Whilst we agree that pepperoni has a nice "twang", the video was supposed to be about your favorite champion, NOT your favorite Hot Pocket. We would appreciate it if you could remake the video, thanks.
twitch chat
March 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here. I understand you are willing to sell yourself out like a cheap Romanian hooker to any two-bit game development outfit as long as they dangle some shekels in front of your beady little eyes? Great! Because I have this brilliant game in beta testing right now called "Watching Paint Dry" and I am willing to pay you $5.00 USD to play it for 24 hours straight. Let me know what you think, you glorious sellout!
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

sellout

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing