[Copypasta] Being a Karen is low key awesome as hell

Being a Karen is low key awesome as hell. You get to have sweet ass chunky highlights and drive a big hideous SUV you secretly eat 3 donuts a day in and dont report to weight watchers. You can go to your jazzersize class absolutely fucked up on airplane bottles of rum and a perc you got from your friend who has back issues. Call your daughter a whore in front of her friends when she's 12 then pretend not to remember it when she brings it up deeply traumatized in her 20s. Fucking boss bitch shit straight up. Just blasting "dude looks like a lady" max volume flooring it to a target to cause a ruckus returning a bath mat. Not giving a single shit if its problematic. You like it that way. Making your dumbass kids apologize to YOU when you say racist shit. Getting zooted on your strawberry nosed husbands blood pressure meds. Hell yes queen fucking slay.
March 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Watch a middle aged man play a children's card game

twitchquotes: EleGiggle THAT MOMENT EleGiggle WHEN YOU EleGiggle REALIZE EleGiggle EleGiggle THAT YOU PAY $5 A MONTH EleGiggle TO WATCH A MIDDLE AGED MAN EleGiggle PLAY A CHILDRENS CARTOON GAME EleGiggle
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May 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

if you guys are new to twitch...

twitchquotes: if you guys are new to twitch and looking for a streamer to watch with a friendly community you should watch forsen :)
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March 2018
Forsen

Positive "Give me a second guys" copypasta

twitchquotes: “Give me a second, guys,” Kripp says. “Gotta hit up the bathroom” He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately springs up from his chair and shouts "I LOVE THIS GAME!" before giving Dex a swift pat on the head. As Dex yips loudly in delight, Kripp runs over to give Rania a kiss on the cheek. Rania then tries to take out the trash, but Kripp swiftly grabs the bag from her and does it for her. Elated, Kripp wipes the sweat off his forehead, sits back down, and resumes his stream.
twitch chat
November 2020
Kripp

Partake in the wonderment that is the McGriddle

twitchquotes: I can only assume from your cavalier attitude that you have yet to partake in the wonderment that is the McGriddle. Let me enlighten you. What happens is the One True God grows them on trees in the Elysian Fields using a heretofore unused incantation. He then proceeds to magic them down to your local eatery where whatever Ghetto Bastard cook your McDonalds has rescued from welfare that week proceeds to wrap it in cellophane and pass it along to you, the fortunate consumer. You proceed to ingest this finery in the vain hope that your obviously overmatched taste buds can somehow grasp the delectable intricacies it is suddenly faced with. Is that egg? Why yes it is, and bacon too. But wait-they didn't add... yes they did, yes they did indeed. They added cheese. And then, then my friends, they wrap it in a sumptuous pancake bun! As your taste buds try to process that amazing piece of information, IT hits them...the syrup nugget. THE MOTHERFUCKING SYRUP NUGGET! It announces itself with a burst of confectionery grandiosity the likes of which your palate has never seen.
twitch chat
April 2020

I keep seeing people posting the same message

twitchquotes: Guys this is awkward, sorry I have to point this out. I keep seeing people posting the same message within very short periods of time, causing the auto scroll function to go crazy. Could you please follow the chat history more closely before you post and make the chat experience more pleasant for everyone? Thanks :)
twitch chat
June 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing