Being a Karen is low key awesome as hell. You get to have sweet ass chunky highlights and drive a big hideous SUV you secretly eat 3 donuts a day in and dont report to weight watchers. You can go to your jazzersize class absolutely fucked up on airplane bottles of rum and a perc you got from your friend who has back issues. Call your daughter a whore in front of her friends when she's 12 then pretend not to remember it when she brings it up deeply traumatized in her 20s. Fucking boss bitch shit straight up. Just blasting "dude looks like a lady" max volume flooring it to a target to cause a ruckus returning a bath mat. Not giving a single shit if its problematic. You like it that way. Making your dumbass kids apologize to YOU when you say racist shit. Getting zooted on your strawberry nosed husbands blood pressure meds. Hell yes queen fucking slay.
I used to be a real ad
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Fired for masturbating on a Zoom call
So this just happened an hour ago and I am still shaking. I’m a staff in public accounting and was in the middle of a 3-hour training on Zoom. Usually when we have these types of calls I just keep the video running in the background and I walk around the room doing things to pass the time and distract myself from the monotone presenters. Well today I forgot that I left the camera on (I usually always have it off but earlier today I had a call with the partner to discuss my upcoming promotion, so I had to have it on). I had no clue I had left the camera on and in the middle of walking around and muttering to myself as I was zoning out, I flipped it out and started to rub one out. I did so with complete confidence, openly and ferociously, stroking faster and faster until I heard the presenter stop and kindly asked me to turn my camera off. Mortified, I lifted my pants up and rushed over to turn the camera off. Soon after the training was over I had a call with HR and they let me know that I was being terminated. I hated the job anyway so not so bummed about that, but I’m not sure what to say in interviews now if I’m asked why I left this job. Any advice?
Back from my 600 seconds timeout
twitchquotes:
Hello guys, I'm back from my 200 seconds timeout. During that time I was able to finish my 200 words essay on the topic of Nazi Germany. My thesis is that Hitler & Nazi beliefs are carried on by twitch tv Nazi moderators who like to act as if they themselves were literally Hitler. I think I should score at least 90 out of 100 points for that paper. Pls no coperino my paperino.
twitch chat
MODS
Unless someone will DM me some feet pics
twitchquotes:
Dear strimmer, I was thinking a lot lately about my life and my recent activity on twitch. thing is only thing that keep me in life at the moment are cute young female skimpy dressed streamers. Just wanted to tell that this is one of my last days on this already overpopulated planet. Unless someone will DM me some feet pics, those could keep me alive for a while 
twitch chat
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Buff bunny (my gf telling the waitress my food is wrong)
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀(\__/)⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀(•ㅅ•)⠀⠀my gf telling the waitress
⠀＿ノ⠀ヽ⠀ノ⠀＼＿⠀⠀my food is wrong
/⠀️⠀Y⠀⌒Ｙ⌒⠀Ｙ⠀️⠀️ヽ
(⠀️⠀️⠀️(三ヽ人⠀⠀/⠀⠀⠀|
|⠀️⠀️⠀️ﾉ⠀¯¯\⠀￣￣ヽノ
ヽ＿＿＿⠀⠀＞､＿_／
⠀⠀⠀｜⠀(⠀王⠀)〈⠀⠀ (\__/)
⠀⠀⠀/⠀⠀ﾐ`——彡⠀\ (•ㅅ•) me