[Copypasta] Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos create Biff Gatezos

Rub dicks together until cum, then swirl the cum into a frothy mix and inject frothy cum mixture into various surrogate mothers who are on fertility drugs, creating a high chance for twins, triplets, quintuplets, etc. Randomly transplant hearts and other organs between all babies to ensure no baby is 100% descendant of either Bill or Jeff. Let babies fight to the death until only one is left. He shall be named Biff Gatezos, overlord of Microzon. Using the combined financial prowess of his fathers, he shall be trained and upgraded to become superhuman in all aspects imaginable. There will never be another Biff Gatezos because Biff Gatezos is eternal. South-Korean baby foreskins will be used to ensure he never ages and therefore never dies. All the gods that have ever been will come down from their heavenly thrones to challenge Biff Gatezos but Biff Gatezos only need drop his trousers and reveal his mighty p***s to strike fear in the hearts of the gods and Satan himself. With a single swing of his mighty staff, Biff Gatezos will catapult the gods out of the universe and claim his rightful throne as Eternal God of Everything. Hope this clears things up.
May 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
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This valorant team is fantastic, they just need to work on

twitchquotes: [INSERT TEAM NAME] is fantastic, they just need to work on communication, aim, map awareness, crosshair placement, eco management, pistol aim, awp flicks, grenade spots, pop flashes, positioning, bomb plant positions, retake ability, spray, skills use, control and getting kills
twitch chat
June 2021

Valorant

Yoshi with Mario's body

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„ โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–’ โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’
ascii art
September 2018

Maya's mod responds to Miz and Maya break up

I wish I could say I didn't see this coming but...sigh..I definitely did. To many people not in the loop it may have come as a shock. They certainly LOOKED like a happy couple, but when you've been a twitch mod for as long as I have...you notice certain things. As Maya's head mod and commandant in charge of holding off weirdos I could tell very clearly that something was up. The way she acted on stream, her general atmosphere, twas as if a beautiful chrysanthemum was being oppressed by a violent and balding Gardner. Someone who had not the faintest idea how to look after beautiful flowers. But the time has come, the thorns and nature hath come to wreak havok. At the moment a plan is being drafted by me and the sub mods to find her a new boyfriend who is fit to properly look after her. Naturally I will be taking the temporary (and maybe permanent if all goes to plan ๐Ÿ˜‰) role of boyfriend/guardian. But while I reveal my plans and provide you all a mere glimpse at the machinations set in motion by this breakup I must warn you... BACK OFF... This is not your fight, you have no idea who you are dealing with. If you come after her now without going through the necessary protocols then I won't be able to control myself. There is a reason I would never show myself on stream or play among us. There is a side to the top twitch dog that you don't wanna know about. These fangs are here for a reason, don't. Make me. Use them.
September 2021
Maya

Simps

SPAM THIS CRUSTACEAN FOR HBOX ELIMINATION

twitchquotes: SPAM ๐Ÿฆ€ THIS ๐Ÿฆ€ CRUSTACEAN ๐Ÿฆ€ FOR ๐Ÿฆ€ HBOX ๐Ÿฆ€ ELIMINATION ๐Ÿฆ€
twitch chat
June 2019

Rhyme Chant

Super Smash Bros

zachary is no more. there is only cock

twitchquotes: sneaky's eyelids flutter open. on one side of his bed, his beloved, lynn. on the other side, his lover, meteos. he slowly awakens to his surroundings. "...cocks," he mutters as he walks to the bathroom. "cocks," he slurs as he brushes his teeth. "cocks," he says while in the shower, hands washing all over his body. "cocks," he says as he burns his food and decides to order postmates. sneaky's life is consumed by cocks. zachary is no more. there is only cock.
twitch chat
July 2020
Sneaky
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