[Copypasta] Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos create Biff Gatezos

Rub dicks together until cum, then swirl the cum into a frothy mix and inject frothy cum mixture into various surrogate mothers who are on fertility drugs, creating a high chance for twins, triplets, quintuplets, etc. Randomly transplant hearts and other organs between all babies to ensure no baby is 100% descendant of either Bill or Jeff. Let babies fight to the death until only one is left. He shall be named Biff Gatezos, overlord of Microzon. Using the combined financial prowess of his fathers, he shall be trained and upgraded to become superhuman in all aspects imaginable. There will never be another Biff Gatezos because Biff Gatezos is eternal. South-Korean baby foreskins will be used to ensure he never ages and therefore never dies. All the gods that have ever been will come down from their heavenly thrones to challenge Biff Gatezos but Biff Gatezos only need drop his trousers and reveal his mighty p***s to strike fear in the hearts of the gods and Satan himself. With a single swing of his mighty staff, Biff Gatezos will catapult the gods out of the universe and claim his rightful throne as Eternal God of Everything. Hope this clears things up.
May 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Kermit the Frog and the Twin Towers

It is actual Muppets canon that Kermit the Frog, in some way, had a role in bringing down the Twin Towers in the terror attacks of September 11, 2001. In "It's a Very Muppets Christmas Movie," a film released in late 2002, Kermit is shown a glimpse of what New York City might look like if he had never been born. Among the scenery of this alternate reality NYC, we find none other than the Twin Towers proudly standing in the background. They were, of course, long destroyed in Kermit's normal reality. And yet, in the world without Kermit, the war on terror is missing its powder keg spark. Who would've thought that green piece of fuck could kermit a terror attack on US soil, but there it stands unimpeachable... We have concrete, canon proof of involvement. Why the world hasn't stopped and asked further questions is only further proof of a media cabal keeping this conversation away from the masses. The Twin Towers would still be standing if it weren't for Kermit the Frog. Al Qaeda was the puppet this time, and Kermit the hand within.
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twitchquotes: When I'm ready to go to sleep I grab my laptop and get in bed. I open my laptop, go to Kripps youtube, turn the brightness all the way up and watch the video with the laptop screen close to my eyes. When the video is done I close my eyes and can still see Kripps face while I go to sleep. It's the only way I can feel safe.
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Worry about a tree, miss the entire forest

twitchquotes: ヽ( ͡°╭͜ʖ╮͡° )ノ And if you only worry about a tree, you'll miss the entire forest around it ヽ( ͡°╭͜ʖ╮͡° )ノ-Sage Dong
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gullin15 is the best streamer

twitchquotes: gullin15 is the best streamer
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Reynad

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today, I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine signaling my impending, earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen EVERYONE in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever had, or ever will produce shot out SO HARD that my dick was ripped apart by my Übernut, accelerating to 5% of the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, it barely slowed before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear powered angle grinder. the sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of illinois became pregnant with my children.
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