[Copypasta] I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today, I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine signaling my impending, earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen EVERYONE in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever had, or ever will produce shot out SO HARD that my dick was ripped apart by my รœbernut, accelerating to 5% of the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, it barely slowed before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear powered angle grinder. the sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of illinois became pregnant with my children.
July 2021

Classic

Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Classic Copypastas

HELLO 911 JAKE IS IN MY ROOM

twitchquotes: 4Head HELLO 911 ๐Ÿ“ž 4Head JAKE IS IN MY ROOM ๐Ÿ“ž 4Head HE HAS A PULSE BOMB ๐Ÿ“ž 4Head WHATS THAT? ๐Ÿ“ž 4Head ILL BE OKAY? ๐Ÿ“ž 4Head
twitch chat
April 2018
OverwatchLeague

Classic

Overwatch

You've been gnomed

โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–—โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–—โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ƒโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–ƒโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ƒโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ƒโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–’โ–“
โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–“
โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ
โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–’โ–“โ–“โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ
โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„
โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆ
โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘
October 2018

Classic

FLIP THAT TABLE

(โ•ฏยฐโ–กยฐ)โ•ฏ๏ธต โ”ปโ”โ”ป FLIP THAT TABLE. โ”ปโ”โ”ป ๏ธต ใƒฝ(ยฐโ–กยฐใƒฝ) FLIP THIS TABLE. โ”ปโ”โ”ป ๏ธต ๏ผผ\('0')/๏ผ ๏ธต โ”ปโ”โ”ป FLIP ALL THE TABLES เฒ _เฒ  Son... เฒ _เฒ  Put. เฒ __เฒ  The tables. เฒ ___เฒ  Back. (โ•ฎยฐ-ยฐ)โ•ฎโ”ณโ”โ”ณ (โ•ฏยฐโ–กยฐ)โ•ฏ๏ธต โ”ปโ”โ”ป NEVER!!!!
July 2015

Classic

Math is "mental abuse to humans"

twitchquotes: You know how some people say that math is โ€œmental abuse to humansโ€? Well, lemme tell you one thing: โ€œMathโ€ is an abbreviation for โ€œmathematicsโ€, so youโ€™re only looking at 36% of the whole thing. What does the other 64% stand for? It stands for โ€œexcept mostly at truly intelligently cool studentsโ€! That means, if you think math is mentally abusing you, youโ€™re not truly intelligent or cool! Youโ€™re dumb and lame! So the next time someone gives you the first 36% of this ridiculous acronym, give them the other 64%. Donโ€™t forget to tell them that they suck at etymology.
twitch chat
October 2020

Classic

Handsome Squidward

โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โฃ โฃคโฃคโฃ„โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃ€โ คโ –โ Šโ ‰โ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโ ‰โ ™โ ฒโขคโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โกคโ Šโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโขฆโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โกœโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โข€โก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โขขโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โขณโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃธโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ฑโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โก€โ ˆโ €โก€โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โกโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โกฐโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˜โก†โกœโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โขงโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ธโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃ€โฃคโก‚โ €โ ‡โ ฑโ €โก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โข‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโข„โก€โข โฃŸโขญโฃฅโฃคโ ฝโก†โ €โกถโฃŠโฃ‰โฃฒโฃคโข€โกžโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˜โฃ†โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โก€โ €โ โ ‚โ ˜โ „โฃˆโฃ™โกกโกดโ €โ €โ ™โฃ„โ ™โฃ›โ œโ ˜โฃ†โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโขฆโก€โ €โ €โ €โขธโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ „โ Šโ €โ €โ €โ €โกธโ ›โ €โ €โ €โขธโ †โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโ “โ ฆโข„โฃ˜โฃ„โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โก โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃ‡โก€โ €โ €โฃ โ Žโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โฃธโ โ ˆโกŸโ ’โ ฒโฃ„โ €โ €โกฐโ ‡โ –โข„โ €โ €โกนโก‡โข€โ Žโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โข€โก‡โ €โ €โก‡โ €โ €โ นโ €โกžโ €โ €โข€โ คโฃโ ญโก€โขฑโขธโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โข€โฃ€โฃ€โฃ โ žโ €โ €โข โก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ โ €โขดโ ฅโ คโ ฆโ ฆโกผโ €โขธโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โฃ€โฃคโฃดโฃถโฃฟโฃฟโกŸโ โ €โ ‹โ €โ €โ €โขธโ โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ‘โฃ โขคโ โ โ €โขธโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกŸโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โขธโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ฌโ ฅโฃ„โ €โ €โ ˆโ ฒโก„โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโก‡โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ™โ ฆโฃ„โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโขณโ €โ €โข€โฃฟโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃงโ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโ ™โ ’โ ฆโ คโขคโฃ„โฃ€โฃ โ คโขฟโฃถโฃถโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃถโฃคโก€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃ„โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โข€โกผโ โ €โ €โฃ โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃ„โ €โ €โ €โ € โฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃถโฃฆโฃคโฃคโฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โฃคโฃคโฃคโฃถโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ €โ €โ €
February 2021

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing