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Let me tell you what happens tomorrow because it's even worse than what happened today. There they are, Melvin Capital. Furiously jerking their 2 inch boomer cocks to their GME short gainz. They are so close, edging themselves with "Oh yeah, the next Blockbuster" and "Yes baby, brick and mortar go bye-bye." They even sit in a circle sucking and jerking each other off, double fisting like they're skiing down Mt. Everest with cocks instead of poles. Out of nowhere, Ryan Cohen steps in with the most massive and vieniest schlong they've ever seen. He starts eating their lunch and muttering about Cheey for games and they can't do anything because their engorged penises are stuck in eachothers mouths and poop chutes. They attempt to ignorr him and try to keep jerking but they accidentally used hand sanitizer instead of lotion. BAM GME starts rising from the ashes and the retards of WSB are lighting the fires. We brought lighters that we borrowed from our wives boyfriend's and they weren't those shitty clear one. We have motherfucking Bics and torches. Melvin is crying and pleading but we are too retarded to understand coherent English. They see giant red dildos on their screens and their buttholes begin to pucker. They dump everything they have at us in an attempt to supress the price but again, we only understand broken english and emojis. We only understand basic visuals and colors. When we see green, we buy. When we see red, we take out another student loan or CC cash advance and we buy more. We are fucking unstoppable. GME skyrockets and they start scrambling to pull dicks out of random orifices, but it's too late. Bears R Fuk. After we are done splooging all over their faces, and becoming their wife's new boyfriends, we throw Melvin and BOA on the chopping block to be liquidated and disposed of. That's what happens tomorrow, and we are gonna turn that shit into a movie.

A Jerma clone showed up at my school as a substitute once. He comes is and is posturing like he’s really tall and large but the guy couldn’t be more than 5’4”. The class starts and he is just sitting there in quietly staring forward in the front of the class with an awfully distorted picture of his face that said “The required information is in the lab directions” but he never handed us anything. This goes on for a minute until one of the talkative kids just asks if he is okay he hadn’t even taken a breath yet and veins were popping out of his neck and forehead. The moment the kid made a noise he stated wildly shaking his head around while making high pitched laser(?) sounds. Worst period of geology I’ve ever had. The rest was just him passing out the lab sheet but he would just hold it toward them motionless until they reached for it and he would snatch it away and laugh at them right in their face. Couldn’t find a more fucked guy if I tried. I'll edit in the image if anyone got a pic of it.

👫WE 😡DIDN’T🤪START❌THE😾 FIRE 🔥 IT 🤨WAS 🤬ALWAYS🤩BURNING🥵 SINCE 😧THE✨WORLDS🌍 BEEN😻TURNING

Ok, if you didn’t know this I should probably tell you. I am uncircumcised, and with me still having my foreskin it feels better to yank my hog. So I have a little routine of jacking off everyday around 11 pm at night. It was around 9:45 pm when I was feeling a little Horny. I was on Nikocado Avocado’s OnlyFans and I must say, it got the better of me. So I just started tugging my meat sword before my usual routine. There’s nothing wrong with that, a premature coom session, it’s all good. So I was jelking my prize hog when all of a we sudden I noticed that my door was still open. I knew that since I started masturbaiting earlier then usual that my family would still be awake. So I get up from my bed and walk to my door still jerking off and I get to my door. I’m just about to close the door when all of a sudden my prankster of a step sister slams my bedroom door shut. And that’s when a sudden sharp pain hits me and I look down and see that my foreskin has gotten caught in the door as it slammed. Holy shit it fucking hurt, my fucking dick felt like it was gonna fall off. Then when I think shit can’t get worse. My step sister started banging on my door demanding that she come inside my room. The banging was making it worse. I shouted “GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!” but she didn’t listen. She kept banging on the door and that’s when my pain grew into pleasure. It was basically like my foreskin was being rubbed by the doors banging. “Oh shit, that feels really good” I thought. It was like I was fucking my door, it was the best feeling of my life. I wanted to scream and moan In pleasure, but my sister was on the other end of the door. Then right when I was about to bust my sister said “ Fine, I’m just gonna come in anyway”. She opened the door, but It was too late. I busted a fat nut all over her face. She started screaming and she ran away to the bathroom. God, I felt so embarrassed. Despite that, fucking that door was amazing. 10/10 would recommend.

There are too many people that call themselves what they are not, including on this very server. The design industry seems the worst, but I'm sure its the same in other professions. Everyone with 3 months of some Google class, suddenly calls themself an UI/UX Designer, while the craft (especially UX) takes years to develop. I also know a lot of professional designers that have 20+ years of experience, and still don't call themselves experts. Lucky for us, the professional market also sees through those fake designers. So, hone your craft, become better, and stop calling yourselves UI/UX Designers, when you are not. Or Full Stack Developer, when you only do HTML and CSS. Or Open Heart Surgeon, when you are only a masseuse.

I woke up in the morning at 7am and immediately went to wake up my parents. I explained to them how I'm dreamgender and dreamsexual but they didnt even know who dream is, boomers. I had to explain to them its a sexy minecraft youtuber and how Im connected to him emotionally and sexually. They didnt get mad at all (yay!) they just stared at me with a blank expression. I think theyre proud of me but just dont know what to think of it yet since it came as such as shock to them. I tried to show them a video of dream but they werent really interested and told me to go to school. in school the first class was english so I told the teacher that I had an important announcement that I would like to tell to the entire class. Yesterday I prepared a short powerpoint presentation on dreamgenders and dreamsexuals to make them better understand. I explained how dream is really hot and how I feel a deep connection to dream and how he is my soulmate and my identity. The teacher was so amazed I guess she didnt know what to say haha she looked like she was smiling. When I finished explaining why dream is hot and awesome, I started clapping expecting everyone else to do the same, but they didnt. My best friend didnt clap either which was really weird but maybe he was also surprised since I hadnt told him either. my teacher ended up being the only one clapping, so Im really thankful to her. I thought they didnt get it so I tried to explain in simpler terms that I love dream and how I am dream. Some girls were giggling the entire time so I called them out on it saying they shouldnt be laughing when I have prepared for this moment for so long. Then they started saying really dreamphobic things like saying its stupid and makes no sense. I explained to them why its homophobic and close minded but they didnt listen. Then some guy called me a stupid fucking nerd which made my blood boil. I challenged him to a duel in minecraft which he didnt even respond to and his friends were just laughing. Everyone else was silent I thought that they secretly supported me but just didnt want to face the same oppression dreamgenders and dreamsexuals have to face every day. Then the teacher told me to get back to my seat and started the lesson like nothing happened. I told her I wanted to show the class a compilation of minecraft manhunt best moments but she didnt let me do it. After the class a bunch of my classmates came to me and asked if I was joking or what and I tried to explain it to them but they were just making fun of me and saying Im weird and a creep. it was awful. I was bullied a bit before but now nobody wanted to talk to me the entire day even when I tried to show my ''friends'' (not friends anymore, theyre nazis apparently) some dream videos and discussed minecraft speedrunning they didnt respond at all. I've been crying the entire day because I cant believe the people I thought were cool were dreamphobes/racists/nazis as well. 😭😭😭😭😭 its honestly really crushing how people are still like this in 2021. now Im starting to realize I dont need those kinds of toxic people in my life and the only person I truly need is Dream. Dream is my boyfriend, my gender, my sexuality, my identity and my best friend all at once, why would I need anyone else?

I (15M) was walking from school to home today and a girl (15F) kicked my leg. So yeah I was walking to home today and that bitchass girl kicked my leg. It didn't hurt too much it was more like a fly landing on me as my super muscly body protected me. But anyway, as a person that believes in gender equality I punched her a lot harder with my super muscly manly man fists and knocked her out, kidnapped her to my school's chemistry lab at night, then with my super smart brain I composed HCl (hydrochloric acid for those uneducated inferior peeps) with my super chemistry knowledge. I then dipped her in my glorious acid just like any gender equality believing sigma male would. Equal rights equal fights my dear superior reddit using sigma male friends.

My girlfriend’s dad is a banking exec, I told him I’m all in on crypto He and I met yesterday. He is a kind and mild mannered guy who comes off as deeply intelligent. I asked him how he felt about decentralized finance and he said it was a risky venture (no surprise from his banking point of view) and anyone putting money into it is a fool. He seemed disappointed that his daughter’s boyfriend wanted to talk about crypto. For me, crypto has fundamentally changed my life - it has taught me about finance, geopolitics, and that I have the agency to live a life I wasn’t sure was possible. So, when he seemed disappointed, what did I do? I doubled down. I gave an impassioned speech about why cryptocurrency is changing the world and democratizing resources that traditionally only the wealthy had access to. It is giving poor communities a fighting chance and that it is revolutionary and something that is a big part of my investment strategy. I don’t know what the point of this post is, but I just, idk, he made me feel like a fool of an investor because he either just doesn’t get it or is scared of it and I feel like his view of me has become less favorable in terms of dating his daughter, but I’m going to stand up for what I believe in. Ramble over.

When I was 13 years old a buddy of mine tried to convince me to fool around. I wasn't into it, and he told me it's not gay if you're wearing socks. I didn't believe him, went home, and asked my dad. That's 'gentleman's gay', hardly gay at all. Don't see it much these days. The 50s were a different time. What were we to do? We were typical boarding school boys, rich with vigor, skin slick with drying sweat and gritty earth from a game of pigskin. At night our young, virile bodies filled the dorm with sweet-musky vapors, like game-meat stewed with apple and peppercorn. You'd awake in darkness to the hushed, melodic rhythm of two pairs of white tube socks, barely visible in moonlight, bouncing on the hardwood floor. The deep bond of male friendship played like a thousand different human instruments. The wet claps of skin on skin, the gentle thud of heads on backboards, frenzied cries in the throes of climax. Wilbur, so fat and soft like tapioca pudding. His breasts were so like the real thing, what we fantasized of our future wives. Unwilling, defenseless Wilbur, so slow and uncoordinated in the dark. 10 of us would glaze his bare, pink flesh like a giant raspberry danish. He once had the audacity to tell Headmaster Redford. But Redford was a Deerfield boy once, he understood. So he joined us on our midnight hog hunts. Through college and years after we'd find time here and there, away from the wives at a family lake house. But it's been decades now - the times have certainly changed. If you wanted to do something private with another man, in your socks, it wasn’t ‘gay’. It was just two men, celebrating each other's strength.