twitchquotes:
It starts with a surge of adrenaline. Signals flood the nervous system. Pupils race back and forth behind closed eyelids. Then open. Now it’s up to you to decide what to do with it.
twitch chat
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Oh god I want xqc so bad
twitchquotes:
Oh god I want xqc so bad 😩 💦 he's so smart 🤓 📚 and cute 😘 🙈 I would take him to my apartment and kiss him 👄 😘 lick him 👅 😛 and finger him 
👌 I would fuck him 🍆 💦 then I'd get him pregnant 🤰 👶 and we'd raise our own little baby 👨👨👦 👦 and play fortnite with him 🎮 ⌨️ xd
👌 I would fuck him 🍆 💦 then I'd get him pregnant 🤰 👶 and we'd raise our own little baby 👨👨👦 👦 and play fortnite with him 🎮 ⌨️ xd
twitch chat
xQcOW
Emoji Pasta
I hate April Fool's Day
I’m fucking shaking and crying right now y’all, and people aren’t taking me seriously. This is a DUMB FUCKING HOLIDAY, where people say shit that ISN’T FUCKING REAL for NO REASON. I’ve cut off 8 family members already for falling for this shriveled up, half-assed ANNUAL CORPORATE FIG LEAF like the NPC SHEEP THEY ARE. Maybe if they listened to REAL COMEDY like Bill Maher or political satire that validates what I already believe in, they’d be WORTHY OF INTERACTING WITH. BUT NO, I have to scroll through my timeline, seething, wailing and gnashing my teeth as I’m BOMBARDED BY LOW EFFORT CORNY CAPITALIST PROPOGANDA. THIS IS A SERIOUS DAY. I’m allowed to be this pressed about ha-ha corny joke day because IT’S SERIOUS FOR ME AND THEREFORE SHOULD BE FOR EVERYONE. My great uncle was tragically flattened while trying to rob a coca-cola vending machine on this date, and PEOPLE ARE STILL MAKING CORNU FUKUNG JOKES. I’ve had enough
My 12 year old son watches Rick and Morty
twitchquotes:
Today my 12 year old son and I walked into harvard to sign him up for college. The dean rudly asked what a 12 year old was doing signing up for such a prestigious institute like harvard. My son took of to reveal his Rick and Morty shirt and proclaimed "Well you see sir I watch Rick and Morty". A look of confusion came over the deans face and I have never been so proud. The dean quickly made sure to appologize to my son but it was too late, the police rushed in and dragged him out. My son passed all his classes with 4.0s and graduated top of his class in the first day of college.
twitch chat
Rick and Morty
How traders politely decline the second date
I discovered recently if I am on a date and I’m not that interested in a second, all I need to do is start talking about my stocks. They won’t ask for another one then, I won’t have to politely decline.
WallStreetBets
i got this new anime plot
i got this new anime plot. basically there’s this high school girl except she’s got huge boobs. i mean some serious honkers. a real set of badonkers. packin some dobonhonkeros. massive dohoonkabhankoloos. big ol’ tonhongerekoogers. what happens next?! transfer student shows up with even bigger bonkhonagahoogs. humongous hungolomghononoloughongous