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Zven checks his PayPal

twitchquotes: After his loss, Zven stays up deep into the night. As the rest of TSM sleeps, he opens up a new window to check his PayPal. A smile stretches across his face
twitch chat
April 2019
Riot Games

Classic

League of Legends

I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire

twitchquotes: I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire and prophetic indictments of contemporary Twitch chat. Copypasta when I was a younger teenager had the potency to topple Nazi moderatorships and revolutionize new chat epochs. Even the truncation of "copypasta" to "pasta" shows a lack of eloquence that speaks volumes. If, like me, you are a product of those better times and wish to see them return then speak out. Let the memers and Toucans know that real copypasta back.
twitch chat
July 2015

MODS

Classic

Waiting for adblock to be disabled

AYAYA CUTE CHAT

twitchquotes: โœŒ๏ธ AYAYA ๐ŸŒธ CUTE CHAT โœŒ๏ธ AYAYA ๐ŸŒธ โœŒ๏ธ AYAYA ๐ŸŒธ CUTE CHAT โœŒ๏ธ AYAYA ๐ŸŒธ โœŒ๏ธ AYAYA ๐ŸŒธ CUTE CHAT โœŒ๏ธ AYAYA ๐ŸŒธ โœŒ๏ธ AYAYA ๐ŸŒธ CUTE CHAT โœŒ๏ธ AYAYA ๐ŸŒธ โœŒ๏ธ AYAYA ๐ŸŒธ
twitch chat
October 2021

Weebs

Anime

NA, aka 'No Achievements'

twitchquotes: NA, aka 'No Achievements' is the weakest region in the professional League of Legends scene. They are specifically known for their clown fiestas and never winning anything worthwhile in the history of League of Legends.
twitch chat
November 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

EU vs NA

NA WHY SO QUIET?

twitchquotes: LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL NA WHY SO QUIET? LUL
twitch chat
November 2018

EU vs NA

Waiting for adblock to be disabled

My name is Van, I'm an artist

twitchquotes: My name is Van, I'm an artist, I'm a performance artist. I'm hired to people to fulfill their fantasies, their deep dark fantasies. I was gonna be a movie star y'know, modeling and acting. After a hundred and two additions and small parts I decided y'know I had enough, Then I got in to Escort world. The client requests contain a lot of fetishes, so I just decided to go y'know... full โ™‚Masterโ™‚ and change my entire house into a dungeon... โ™‚Dungeonโ™‚Masterโ™‚ now with a full dungeon in my house and It's going really well. Fisting is 300 bucks and usually the guy is pretty much hard on pop to get really relaxed y'know and I have this long latex glove that goes all the way up to my armpit and then I put on a surgical latex glove up to my wrist and just lube it up and it's a long process y'know to get your whole arm up there but it's an intense feeling for the other person I think for myself too, you go in places that even though it's physical with your hand but for some reason it's also more emotional it's more psychological too and we both get you know to the same place it's really strange at the same time and I find sessions like that really exhausting. I don't know I feel kinda naked because I am looking at myself for the first time, well not myself but this aspect of my life for the first time and it's been harsh... three to five years already? I never thought about it... Kinda sad I feel kinda sad right now, I don't know why
twitch chat
August 2019

Hungrybox is in need of a MAJOR comeback!

twitchquotes: Hungrybox is in need of a MAJOR comeback! I got you, son! Mom? hit noises ding Yes! Amazing! A surprise save from Hungryboxโ€™sโ€ฆ.mother? Your moves were a little bit off son, you must be hungry. Fuel up on Campbellโ€™sยฎ Chunkyยฎ Soup. Thanks Mom. Now, letโ€™s smash this noob!
twitch chat
May 2020
Hungrybox

SIMP SUMMER IS OVER

twitchquotes: SORRY SLUTSโ€ผ๏ธ๐Ÿ˜ค๐ŸŒžSIMP SUMMER๐ŸŒžIS OVER๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ๐ŸšซYOU BETTER FUCK OFF ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿผโ€โ™€๏ธBECAUSE NO โŒSIMP โŒSEPTEMBER HAS ONLY JUST BEGUN๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ™๐Ÿป YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ˜ณ LOOKS LIKE THE ๐Ÿ—TURKEY๐Ÿ— ISNT GETTING ANY SLURPY ๐ŸŒง TONIGHT๐ŸŒšโ€ผ๏ธ PREPARE ๐Ÿคž๐ŸปUR PUSSIES ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘‰๐ŸปFOR A DRY SPELL โ˜€๏ธ CAUSE ITS TIME๐Ÿ•‘ FOR THE BOYS ๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ’ช๐ŸผTO FOCUS ๐Ÿ‘€ ON THEMSELVES ๐Ÿ˜‡YOU SLUTS BEST SAVE YOURSELVES FOR THAT GOOD DICK๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ† SEND THIS TO 7๏ธโƒฃ OF YOUR BIGGEST HOES๐Ÿ‘ฏโ€โ™€๏ธTO LET THEM KNOW YOU'RE READY๐Ÿ˜ŽFOR NO โŒSIMPโŒSEPTEMBER๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป
twitch chat
September 2020

Simps

Emoji Pasta

Trolling My Office With Among Us PART 8 (GRAND SERIES FINALE)

I was dashing around the office. Everyone looked at me weird. I was screaming, "SUS! SUS! AMOGUS!" Everyone started chanting with me. "SUS! SUS! AMOGUS! AMONG SUS! WHEN THE IMPOSTER IS SUS!" We all did the Among Us beatbox in unison. It was beautiful. Like a horse waving its mane in the air on a bright and pretty day. But suddenly I noticed; one of the kids wasn't doing the Among Drip beatbox! So I ran over to her. "Hey kid," I said, "Stop being an asparagus or whatever your dumb star signs are and be not sussy with us!" She looked at me weird and said "Whatever, old man." That was so disrespectful and SUS of her! So I put my hands around her neck and twisted her head off "Like in that one kill animation in Among Us." Everyone looked at me in horror, even the ones who were Among Beatboxing with me! Everyone was looking at me like I had just sexually abused a Syrian 4 year old refugee (which I had done before.) I said "What?" when suddenly the elevator opened. It was the CEO of Pepsi-co! I noticed the Pepsi pin on her shirt and said "When the Pepsi is sus!" because it reminded me of the Among Us crewmate .I did the sussy Among Us beatbox. You know the one? It goes; ding ding ding ding ding ding ding, ding ding ding! BM BM! You know the one! But, before I could finish it, I noticed; her boobs were big! I took my finger and poked her titty that was almost bursting out of her shirt. "Booba." I said. She had a face more horrified than anyone in the room, like before when everyone looked at me last week like I murdered Bosnian children. You remember that, right? She screamed "SECURITY!" Two buff men with pecs almost as big as hers and clothes so tight you could see their 12-pack abs through the shirt tackled me. I said "That's a bit SUSSY!" (Like how the guy said it in the "STOP POSTING ABOUT AMONG US" rant. "You're not wholesome Keanu Chungus 100 Fortnite bad TikTok cringe Minecraft & Reddit good." I said. I got out and kicked their nuts. Although they were big, (not as big as my magnum mega-cock, you know like the size of Danny Devito's?) they still cried when I kicked their nuts. "You fucking cracker-jacks! You're Tik-Tokers trying to invade Reddit!" I screamed. I dashed for the door but an alarm started blaring and steel barriers went down over the windows. I barely slid out of the door before the steel door closed under me. I heard the alarms blaring even from inside. I started running, running away trying to flee the scene. Not even half a mile away I saw a SWAT police car dash by me. It started to slow down, oh shit, they noticed me! I jumped into a nearby bush and hid, hoping he wouldn't see me. Quickly, a bunch of men fully armed with automatic rifles and heavy armor came out of the back, scoping the area around. "We can't let him get away!" I heard one of them yell. Were they talking about me? I didn't do anything sus, at least if murder, sexual harassment, and assault don't count as being sus. I stayed still, not even making a sound. A few minutes in, I heard my dickhole queef. It didn't make that much of a sound but I just barely saw out of the bush, the SWAT team start looking around. Shit. They heard my cock fart. I couldn't move as it would make too much noise. Eventually, after a while of looking, they just left. I was free. I quickly got out and ran, but making sure to run behind the bushes so I wouldn't be spotted. I eventually got into the main part of the city. The town wasn't all that big, but it was big enough for me to hide. I did it. I really did it. I had gotten away. Eventually, I made it far. Far out of town. I can't even tell Reddit where I am. It's too secret. I'm currently living a secret life in my inconspicuous location. But, this is the story of how I trolled my office. With Among Us.
April 2021

Trolling with Among Us

Among Us / Amogus

EPICLY TROLLING MY CLASS WITH AMONG US!!!!

So today I trolled my class with Among Us in an epic way. We were doing a test and were putting numbers into the computer to log into the test. It reminded me of Among Us so I shouted, "IS THAT AN AMONG US REFERENCE?!?!" I then pointed at the kid next to me, who was wearing a red shirt, and yelled, "RED SUS! RED SUS! VOTE OUT RED HE'S SUS!" The teacher tried to pull me out of the classroom but I stabbed him with a pencil epic John Wick style! I proceeded to scream, "DEAD BODY REPORTED!" Then they EXPELLED me and it was kind of sus the way they did it. On my way out of the school I saw a vent so I grabbed the nearest kid and shoved him into the vent! I cracked his skull but it was just a joke so it's okay. My therapy starts tomorrow
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

What happened to this ad? :(

Bumper Ameng burger

twitchquotes: Bumper stared at the burger in his hand. Normally, he loved chowing down on his Big Mac like he chowed on these beta tanks like Swon or Muma or Super. But not today. Today, this burger was a sign of his failure. The double patties of meat reminded him not of succulent juicy beef but only the mighty veiny vascular muscles of Ameng. The seeded bread buns? It was Amengโ€™s cheeks as he squatted on Bumperโ€™s face. The tomato? It was his blood dripping off Amengโ€™s hammer. The mayo? You know what it is
twitch chat
March 2019
OverwatchLeague

Classic

Overwatch

No longer afford drugs after playing Star Wars Force Arena

twitchquotes: (sponsored viewer): My dad has been struggling with drug addiction for the last 20 years. After I showed him this game, he can no longer afford drugs! Thank you Star Warsโ„ข: Force Arena! SeemsGood
twitch chat
February 2017
Kripp

sellout

Shots 1-5 clearly missed

Summary: Shots 1-5: Clearly missed. Shots 6-9: Missed due to recoil (bad spray control). Shots 10-11: Very close, but recoil and inaccuracy make these reasonable misses. Shot 12: Likely didn't actually fire because Hiko was already dead.
March 2021

CSGO

๐Ÿ‘ปBOO! Srry did I scare you?

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ‘ป๐Ÿ‘ป๐Ÿ‘ปBOO! Srry did I scare you???๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ it's October ๐ŸŽƒ๐Ÿ‘ป๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ‘ฝ๐Ÿ˜ˆ๐ŸŒ‘ you know what that means ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ SLUT-O-WEEN ๐Ÿ‘ฏ send this to 10 of your 10 sluttiest ghost bitches ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ if you get 5 back you're a slutty witch but if you get 10 ur the spookiest bitch on the block๐ŸŽƒ๐Ÿ‘ฏ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’€๐Ÿ‘ป
twitch chat
September 2017

Emoji Pasta

Jeff / Reynad / Mitch

twitchquotes: As Jeff pushed his Fiery War Axe deeper into Reynad's Golden Coin, Reynad hit end turn. Conceal wore off to reveal it was in fact Mitch Jones's Fiery Bat that was penetrating Reynad's Huge Toad. Reynad gasped, and tried to scurry away, but Mitch Jones held on as he forced his way into his Unstable Portal.
twitch chat
May 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

What happened to this ad? :(

Only the chosen can ride this beautiful elephant

twitchquotes: PogChamp only the chosen can ride this beautiful elephant RNCelephant
twitch chat
August 2016
Reynad

EMOJI TEST

twitchquotes: EMOJI TEST ๐Ÿ’ฏ IF YOU TOUCH THE EMOJI, OMFG LMFAO LOL XD โŽ ๐Ÿ˜†
twitch chat
June 2017

Classic

Chat Test

Coke Gaming ad script

twitchquotes: Oh my god, what the hell? what's going on? What, oh my god. Coke, are you serious right now? COKE GAMING WHAT! You are invited to the Twitch Partner Program! HI, I Just got partnered. We got partnered boys. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! What! Coke Gaming, what Is this? 10,000 bits? Coke Gaming, thank you so much for the 10,000 bits! Thanks. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you Coke.
twitch chat
December 2019

Taking my mods for a walk

twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie
What happened to this ad? :(

That's some bad shit right there

twitchquotes: do NOT sign me the FUCK up ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘€ bad shit baฬทฬถ ิ sHit ๐Ÿ‘Ž thats โŒ some bad ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Žshit right ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž th ๐Ÿ‘Ž ere ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž right โŒ there โŒ โŒ if i do ฦฝaาฏ so my sel๏ฝ†๐Ÿšซ i say so ๐Ÿšซ thats not what im talking about right there right there (chorus: สณแถฆแตสฐแต— แต—สฐแต‰สณแต‰) mMMMMแŽทะœ ๐Ÿšซ ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘ŽะO0ะžเฌ ๏ผฏOO๏ผฏOะžเฌ เฌ Ooooแต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’แต’ ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿšซ ๐Ÿ‘Ž ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘€ ๐Ÿ‘Ž๐Ÿ‘ŽBad shit
twitch chat
April 2016
Text-to-Speech Playing