[Copypasta] My name is Van, I'm an artist

twitchquotes: My name is Van, I'm an artist, I'm a performance artist. I'm hired to people to fulfill their fantasies, their deep dark fantasies. I was gonna be a movie star y'know, modeling and acting. After a hundred and two additions and small parts I decided y'know I had enough, Then I got in to Escort world. The client requests contain a lot of fetishes, so I just decided to go y'know... full ♂Master♂ and change my entire house into a dungeon... ♂Dungeon♂Master♂ now with a full dungeon in my house and It's going really well. Fisting is 300 bucks and usually the guy is pretty much hard on pop to get really relaxed y'know and I have this long latex glove that goes all the way up to my armpit and then I put on a surgical latex glove up to my wrist and just lube it up and it's a long process y'know to get your whole arm up there but it's an intense feeling for the other person I think for myself too, you go in places that even though it's physical with your hand but for some reason it's also more emotional it's more psychological too and we both get you know to the same place it's really strange at the same time and I find sessions like that really exhausting. I don't know I feel kinda naked because I am looking at myself for the first time, well not myself but this aspect of my life for the first time and it's been harsh... three to five years already? I never thought about it... Kinda sad I feel kinda sad right now, I don't know why
twitch chat
August 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

I meet Nigerian Princess on Internet

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp. You say you welly unlucky last few days. I've been unlucky last few years. But ever since i start watch your stream last week my luck improve. I meet nigerian princess on internet who promise me 100 billion usd and a full golden Ragnaros
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

I fucked Up DVD

Earlier today I was really horny, and I saw what I thought to be a blank DVD. I thought, DVDs have a tight hole, they might feel pretty good. So I put my soft pp into the hole of the DVD, and for a few seconds as I started getting harder, it felt pretty good, but then, once I was fully erect, it started being painful. My pp was stuck in the DVD, and I had to break it in half to get if out. It was then when I flipped the broken DVD over and realized that it was not a blank DVD, but a copy of the Pixar movie Up.. Well guys, guess I fucked up.
April 2022

Classic

tyler imo u are the best league of legends player

twitchquotes: tyler imo u are the best league of legends player in the history, you show skills and wits beyond anyone else who played the game, and is improving on a daily basis. you show great promise as long as you keep doing what you're doing right now. cheers
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

Trevor from ChatBotsForTwitch.com

twitchquotes: Hi [insert streamer name], this is Trevor from ChAtBotsForTwitch,com. We kindly request that if you're going to pay the extra to have our employees interact with your chat, you don't make fun of them. We know you have difficulty getting real viewers and it frustrates you, but please don't take it out on my employees. Thank you, Trevor.
twitch chat
March 2021

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Tyler1 is a hard stuck attack-damage carry

twitchquotes: LoLTyler1, also known as the most renown athletes in the American game of football and collegiate participants, is a hard stuck attack-damage, a role found in the monolithic video game, League of Legends. Tyler1 specializes in fields such as sports, academia, and banter. Though Tyler is self-proclaimed to be, quote, “alpha as fuck”, he often cannot pronounce most of the words that his chat uses. Such mispronunciations include this particular instantiation of this current message..
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing