[Copypasta] My name is Van, I'm an artist

twitchquotes: My name is Van, I'm an artist, I'm a performance artist. I'm hired to people to fulfill their fantasies, their deep dark fantasies. I was gonna be a movie star y'know, modeling and acting. After a hundred and two additions and small parts I decided y'know I had enough, Then I got in to Escort world. The client requests contain a lot of fetishes, so I just decided to go y'know... full ♂Master♂ and change my entire house into a dungeon... ♂Dungeon♂Master♂ now with a full dungeon in my house and It's going really well. Fisting is 300 bucks and usually the guy is pretty much hard on pop to get really relaxed y'know and I have this long latex glove that goes all the way up to my armpit and then I put on a surgical latex glove up to my wrist and just lube it up and it's a long process y'know to get your whole arm up there but it's an intense feeling for the other person I think for myself too, you go in places that even though it's physical with your hand but for some reason it's also more emotional it's more psychological too and we both get you know to the same place it's really strange at the same time and I find sessions like that really exhausting. I don't know I feel kinda naked because I am looking at myself for the first time, well not myself but this aspect of my life for the first time and it's been harsh... three to five years already? I never thought about it... Kinda sad I feel kinda sad right now, I don't know why
twitch chat
August 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

I've never even watched The Simpsons

I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
December 2020

This Disney DVD is enhanced with Disney's FastPlay

twitchquotes: 𝙏𝙝𝙞𝙨 𝘿𝙞𝙨𝙣𝙚𝙮 𝘿𝙑𝘿 𝙞𝙨 𝙚𝙣𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚𝙙 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝘿𝙞𝙨𝙣𝙚𝙮’𝙨 𝙁𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮. 𝙔𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙢𝙤𝙫𝙞𝙚 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙖 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 𝙤𝙛 𝙗𝙤𝙣𝙪𝙨 𝙛𝙚𝙖𝙩𝙪𝙧𝙚𝙨 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚𝙜𝙞𝙣 𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙘𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙮. 𝙏𝙤 𝙗𝙮𝙥𝙖𝙨𝙨 𝙁𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮, 𝙨𝙚𝙡𝙚𝙘𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙈𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙈𝙚𝙣𝙪 𝙗𝙪𝙩𝙩𝙤𝙣 𝙖𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙮 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚. 𝙁𝙖𝙨𝙩 𝙋𝙡𝙖𝙮 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙗𝙚𝙜𝙞𝙣 𝙞𝙣 𝙖 𝙢𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩…
twitch chat
May 2019

what do you say when you come? murk durgle

About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist. I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out" Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
January 2022

Vegeta

█────▓▒█▓▒▒██░▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▓▓▓▓──────── █────▓▒▓▓▓▒█▓▒▓▓▒▒▓▓▒▓▒▓▓▒▓▓▓▓▓▒──────── █────▒▓▓▓▒░█▓▒▓▓▓▒▓▓▓▒▒█▓▒▓▓▓▓▓───────── █────▒▓▓▓░▒█▓▓▓▓▓▒█▓▒▓▒█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓───────── █─────▓▓▓─░█▓▒▓▓▒▓█▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▓▓────────── █─────▓▓▒─░▓▓▒▓▓▒▓█▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓░────────── █─────▓▓▒──▓▓▒▓▒▒▓▓▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒─────────── █─────▒▓───▓▓▓▓▓▒█▓▒▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▓────█─────── █──────█───▓▓▒▓▓▒██▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒───██───▓─── █──────▓───▓█▓▓▓▒█▓▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓────█░──▒▓░── █──────░───░█▓▓▒▒█▓▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▒───██───▓▓▒── █───────────█▓▓▓▒█▓▒▓▓▒▓▓▓────█▓──▓▓▓░── █───────────█▓▓▒▓█▓▒▓▓▓▓▓▓──▓▓█▒─▒▓▓▓▒── █▒────▒─────▓▓▒▒▓█▓▒▓▓▓▓▓──▓▒██──▓▓▓▓▒── █─────▓─────░█▒▓▓█▓▒▓▓▓▓▓──▒▓█▓─▓▓▓▓▓▒── █──▓──▓▒─────█▓▒▓██▒▓▓▓▓▒─▓███▓▒▓▓▓▓▓▒── █▓─█──▒▓────▒▓█▓▒██▒▓▓▓▓──█▓▓███▓▒▓▓▓▒── ▓█─█──░▓░─▒█▓──█▓██▒▒▓▓▓─█─────▓█▓▒▓▓░── ▒█─▓───▓▒██─────███▒▓▓▓░██──────▒█▓▓▓░── ▒█░░▒──▒█▓──────▓██▓▒▓▒▓█────────██▒▓░── ▒▓█─█──▓█────────██▓▒▒░█▒─────────█▒▓─── ▒▓█─█──█──────────█▓▒▓▓█──────────█▓▓──▓ ─▓█▓▓──█──────────██─▒█▓──────────▓█▒──█ ─▒▓▓▒░▓▒───────────█▒▒█──────────▓▓█▒──█ ──▓▒─▒█────────────██▓█──────────█─█▓─▓─ ───▓─▓▓░▓──────────░██░──────────█░▓░─── ▓──▒─█─▓█───────────██───────────█▓▒▓─── █────▓─█▓────────────────────────██▒█─── █▓───█─█▓────────────────────────██─█──█ ─█───█▒█▒────────────▒───────────▓█─█──█ ─█░──▓▓█▒────────────▓────────────█─▒─██ ▓██──▓▓█─────────────▒────────────█─░─██ █─█▓─▓██─────────────▓───██───────▓▓▓─█▒ ▒──█▒─██────────▒█───█──▒█▓────────▓█▓▓█ ▒▓█─█─█──────────██──█──██──────▓█▓─██▓▒ ▓███─██─██▓▒─────▒██─▓─▓█▒────▒█─██─█▓█░ ▓▓─▓▒█▓─█▓─▓█▒────██─▓░██────▒█──██─█▓── ▒──█▒█▓─█▓───█▓────█▓▓▓█▓───▒█───██░█▓█─ ▓───▒▒█─██▓───▓▓───▓▓───────█──███─▓█─█▒ █───█▒█▒──██░───█───▓─────▒▓──▓██──████─ ██─▓██▓▓───█░▒█─▒█──██▒▓▓██─▓▓██───███── ▓█──████───██──█▒─▒▓██▒███▓▓─▓██──░█▓──█ ▒█▓─▒███▓───█────▓░██▓▓██▓█──██───█▓──▓█ ▓▓█░───██────█▓──██▒▓███▓▓──▓▓░█▓─█──▓█▓ ▓▓▓█▓───█▓──███▓▓██▓▒▓▓▒─▓▓▓█▓██▒─██████ ▓▓▓▓██░─▒█──▓▓███▓██▓───▓███▓░────█████▓ ▓▓▓▓██████▓───────▓█─██──▓░──────█████▒▒ ▓▓▓▒▓██████──────────█▓──────────███▓▒▒▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▒▓████─────────▓█░─▒────▒───██▒▒▓▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▓▓██───▒─────█▓▓▓────█░─█▓█▒▓▓▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒█░──█▓────▒██▓▓──▓█─█▓─█▒▓▓▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██░─░█───▒▓─▒─▒──▓▒▓█──█▒▓▓▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒█▓─█▓─▒░──░──░▓▒───▒█──██▒▓▓▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒██──██─────▒████───█──███▒▒▓▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒██───██────░▒─────█▓▓████▒▒▓▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█▓────███────────█████████▓▓▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▓██▓───▓███▒────▒███████████▓▒▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒█████████████████████████████▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒██████████████████████████████▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒████████████████████████▓────▓▓ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒████████████████████▒────▒───▒▒ ▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒███████████████████▓░────▓██████ ▓▓▓▒▓▒▓███████████████████▓█▒─▓█████████ ▒▓▓▓▓███████▓███████████████─▓██████████ ▓██▒▓██████████████████████▒████████████
September 2021

Incorrect Dongerhood, Sir

twitchquotes: ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ ༽ಠل͟ರೃ ༽ಠل͟ರೃ ༽ YOU ARRIVED IN THE INCORRECT DONGERHOOD, SIR༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ༼ ಠل͟ರೃ ༽ಠل͟ರೃ ༽ಠل͟ರೃ ༽
twitch chat
April 2014
Text-to-Speech Playing