I used to be a real ad
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HELLO

twitchquotes: ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ HELLO HELLO HELLO ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ
twitch chat
December 2014
strifecro

Artosis is glad Kripp is a sellout like him

twitchquotes: WELL MET KRIPP, IT'S ME ARTOSIS. I'M GLAD YOU'RE JOINING THE WAY OF THE SELLOUT. CONTINUE BEING A CASUAL SELLOUT LIKE ME AND YOU'LL GROW INTO A JEW NOSED GAMER JACKET SELLOUT
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

Hold Ctrl and type wash ur hands

twitchquotes: Hey guys, [streamer] has partnered with Twitch to help spread awareness about COVID-19. Hold Ctrl and type wash ur hands to earn 100 bits!
twitch chat
November 2020

GameStop vs Amazon

i’m not sure how up to date you are on the whole GameStop situation but Amazon is heading for bankruptcy and GameStop is now their biggest competitor. market cap isn’t there yet, but the company plan is on track. also Jeff Bezos is the target of every major corporation now. Amazon CANT survive the next few years with their increasing bad reputation from littering and burning unused inventory to labor rights with their workers being violated. Amazon sounds great, until you look underneath the hood and see all the parts are grinding and screaming. GameStop is targeting Amazon to be the epicenter of e-commerce/gaming. this GameStop earnings has been MASSIVELY anticipated and i believe Amazon will continue to develop a negative correlation to GameStop. so what do they have to do with each other? competitors and GameStops about to make the move with a bite to the jugular.
September 2021

WallStreetBets

Minecraft, but he's torturing my cock and balls.

In this video, I have to beat Minecraft while my friend is torturing my cock and balls. He has a humbler, a stretcher and can actively kick them at any time he wishes. Can I beat the Ender Dragon before my testicles are ruptured? Watch to find out. Also, according to Youtube statistics, only a small percentage of people who watch my videos are actually subscribed, so if you end up liking this video, consider subscribing. It's free and you can always unsubscribe. Enjoy the video.
June 2021
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

How to deal with unsportsmanlike player at chess club?

Theres a very unsportsmanlike player at our club who constantly taunts and belittles everyone else. Whenver you make a mistake he yells out "blunder!" or "inaccuracy!" ... "better move was..." and then says the engine move or what he thinks the engine move is. He also says what he thinks the engine +- is. He plays the kings gambit as much as he can and knows like 30 moves deep into every variation. If you respond something other than e5 to 1.e4 he just laughs and calls you a patzer. He's also OBSESSED with Hikaru Nakamura. He talks about him all the time and shows everyone a picture of him with Hikaru (Its really blurry so its hard to tell if its even him). He's constantly talking about him as if he's a close friend even though he only (maybe?) met him one time. Its bordering on creepy and makes everyone uncomfortable. He calls him "Hikaru-San" which I think is part of his obsession with Japanese culture. He also brings japanese noodles/Ramen to the club every day and will spend like 5-10 minute eating them during his turn just to taunt you. Meanwhile he will be mumbling words in japanese. We tried approaching about his conduct but he just did some weird anime villain laugh, yelled something in Japanese, then ran off to challenge another person to a blitz match. We obviously don't want to tell him not to come but it feels like his presence is deterring new people from joining and its also exhuasting.
February 2022

Chess

Alvin from "Alvin and the Chipmunks" is not a chipmunk

Alvin from "Alvin and the Chipmunks" is not a chipmunk. This is proven by the name "Alvin and the Chipmunks", as you can see, Alvin is separated from the chipmunks, suggesting that Alvin is an entirely different species, making him an "imposter" amongst the others. Also, in "The Chipettes", Brittney has the strongest resemblance to Alvin, so why is it not called "Brittney and the Chipettes". So all that proves that Alvin is not a chipmunk. Not to mention that Alvin wears red, and I'm not sure about you, but that seems awfully sus to me. In the video game "Among us", the color red is was the birth of the obnoxious catchphrase, "red sus", being that the color red in the game is a stereotype that they are the imposter. While that might be unrelated, keep in mind that Alvin wears red too, and he is also the imposter amongst the other chipmunks. So this proves that Alvin is not a chipmunk, or anything like that. Alvin is just a sussy amogus imposter.
October 2021

I answer all of qt's questions he is asking himself

twitchquotes: my mom always asks me who I am skyping with, cause I answer all of qt's questions he is asking himself, am I weird?
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie

Natalie. Fiona. Kenny. Kyle

twitchquotes: Natalie. Fiona. Kenny. Kyle. Long ago, the four mispronounced unit names lived together in harmony. Then everything changed when the Twitch Chat Nation attacked. Only the DogDog, master of all pepega names , could stop them. But when the world needed him most, he vanished.
twitch chat
August 2019
dogdog

Teamfight Tactics

I'm watching you

twitchquotes: ༼ຈل͜├┬┴┬┴ im watching you
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Kripp and another language

twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

TWITCH RAIN

twitchquotes: ———————————————————————— ━☆゚. * ・ 。゚☆゚. * TWITCH RAIN゚ 。゚☆. * ・ 。゚☆━ ———————————————————————— imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch imGlitch
twitch chat
March 2019

If two virgins fuck...

If two virgins fuck and take each other's virginity, shouldn't they still have one each? Because, think about it... The definition of take is to capture and receive something, like, if little Bob got 10 dollars and I rudely took it from him, he'd most likely cry, but I'd also gain 10 dollars since I took 10 dollars from him, no? Shouldn't it be the same with virginity, but hopefully, just without the crying? You take a virginty and lose one in the process, so it should be plus-minus zero, I should still have one virginty left? So if I only fuck virgins, will I be a virgin forever? And can I have multiple virginities if I take from other virgins?
September 2021

Apology letter from the condom factory

twitchquotes: What in the actual rainbows is wrong with your brain? Did you IQ test return with negative results or something? I’m getting closer and closer to believing that your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. Jesus Christ. Love the content keep it up.
twitch chat
December 2020

Greetings Michael, this is your Mother

twitchquotes: Greeting Michael, this is your Mother. I heard earlier that you "maybe" 420 blaze it. I am very concerned. I dont like that Pobelter boy and I dont think you should hang out with him anymore. I hope the rest of you concerned mothers in twitch chat will copy paste this so my son will see...
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

I think my boss might be a communist

I think my boss might be a communist. So a while ago, I got my first paycheck at my new job at a fast food place. I guess it wasn't too bad, but I did the math and figured out that I sold a lot more food per hour than I got paid for, even when you account for the price of the food. When I tried to talk to him about it, he said we're all part of one big team, but some people get paid more than others. This is suspiciously close to the famous "some are more equal than others" from my favorite book, Animal Farm and is what really got me thinking about this. We make the money, and then he takes it and gives it to someone who doesn't even work! I'm not economist, but this is textbook socialism. I think I've come to the conclusion that the best way for me to combat these socialist business practices would be teaming up with my fellow workers unify our power and demonstrate that we understand the full value of our labor. Anyone else have similar experiences with obviously Marxist bosses before, or any other advice?
May 2021

Tyler1 is a hard stuck attack-damage carry

twitchquotes: LoLTyler1, also known as the most renown athletes in the American game of football and collegiate participants, is a hard stuck attack-damage, a role found in the monolithic video game, League of Legends. Tyler1 specializes in fields such as sports, academia, and banter. Though Tyler is self-proclaimed to be, quote, “alpha as fuck”, he often cannot pronounce most of the words that his chat uses. Such mispronunciations include this particular instantiation of this current message..
twitch chat
March 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

Chugga Chugga

twitchquotes: ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ CHUGGA CHUGGA! ᕕ┌◕ᗜ◕┐ᕗ
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

George Orwell ruined my life

January 2022
What happened to this ad? :(

i swear, if I hear one more time that you cant counter Viper postplant.

i swear, if I hear one more time that you cant counter Viper postplant. 1) push her (duh) 2) smoke her lineup position so she cant setup the lineup 3) molly her lineup position, as above 4) bodyblock the Snakebite (this one is hilarious) 5) Sage wall to bounce, as above
June 2021

Valorant

Text-to-Speech Playing