[Copypasta] That hunk of a man is an E-sports athlete?

twitchquotes: That hunk of a man, [insert Cyber sportsman here], is an E-sports athlete? Unbelievable. Kreygasm He could be a Calvin Klein model. Kreygasm Or a pro footballer with a ripped physique like that. Kreygasm That is by far the hottest Cyber sportsman to ever grace the esports industry. Kreygasm
twitch chat
October 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Elundus Core

twitchquotes: The Elundus Core was a 6.2-kilogram (14 lb) subcritical mass of a previously undiscovered isotope of plutonium measuring 89 millimeters and was previously held in Felix "xQc" Lengyel's basement. It now lives in the depths of yellowstone waiting to explode
twitch chat
May 2019
xQcOW

To the conservative suburban woman behind me in line at Subway yesterday:

To the conservative suburban woman behind me in line at Subway yesterday: I’m sorry I kept referring to Fred’s liberally mayo’d oven-roasted chicken sub as a “bukkake special”. I’m sorry that you kept demanding that your teenage son explain why he was laughing so hard. I’m extra sorry that this turn of events led you to practically yelling “ETHAN, WHAT IS A BUKKAKE SPECIAL?” in the middle of a crowded restaurant.
August 2021

Nairoby Quezada I'm really disappointed in you

twitchquotes: Nairoby Quezada I'm really disappointed in you. Your recent food review on the Wendy's BBQ Burger™ has not lived up to your usual standard of quality. You did not even discuss the taste or texture of the new burger. I was really looking forward to your insights but I guess I'll have to look elsewhere. You better step up your review game if you want to keep your audience.
twitch chat
April 2019
NairoMK

At first glance, I was skeptical about PUBG mobile

twitchquotes: At first glance, I was skeptical about PUBG mobile, but I got to hand it to Kripp, he changed my mind. I do not usually play mobile games, but this one was an exception. Well played to you Mr Kripp, you got me hooked and I am loving every second of it.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

sellout

PlayerUnknown's Battlegrounds

She needs a man that can treat her right

twitchquotes: What the fuck man. I'm literally sitting here on the verge of tears. Slaving away in this dead end job saving up for the end of the month splash. I was this close. Maybe I should have done that overtime, if I could get her that money earlier I might have been able to convince her in the dono message. She needs a man that can treat her right, a man like me. I would open the car door for her EVERY TIME, I would pull out her chair at a restaurant, I would lay my twitch hoodie over puddles to protect her from the filth.
twitch chat
December 2020

Simps

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