[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

We wish you a Merry Krippmas

twitchquotes: ʕ ͡◊ ͜◉ ͡◊ ʔ We wish you a Merry Krippmas, We wish you a Merry Krippmas, We wish you a Merry Krippmas and a Salty New Year. Good top-deckings to you, whereever you are, Good top-deckings for Krippmas, and a Salty New Year. ʕ ͡◊ ͜◉ ͡◊ ʔ
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

2021 fireworks

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣷⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠠⢤⣦⠤⠀⠀⠉⢏⠀⠠⣤⣦⠄⠀⡸⠁⠀⠀⠀⣠⠹⠛⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣠⠀⠀⠉⠈⠐⢄⠀⠀⠈⢆⠀⠉⡏⠀⠰⠁⠀⠀⠠⠊⠀⠀⠠⢤⣦⡤⠀⠀ ⠘⠛⠋⠒⠂⠤⢀⠀⠁⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠣⢤⣦⡤⠀⠁⠀⡀⠤⠒⠉⠈⠈⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⣶⡄⠀⣀⣀⠀⠙⠛⢋⡀⠀⠀⡸⠉⠁⠀⠀⣁⡀⠠⠤⠄⠾⠷⠂⠀⠀ ⣀⣤⣀⢀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠁⢤⣶⡄⠀⠀⣀⣀⡀⣀⣠⣀ ⠘⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠄⠂⠀⡠⠀⠀⠀⠐⢄⠀⠀⠂⠠⠄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⣶⣶⠉⠁⠀⢀⣄⠞⠀⠀⠀⡄⠀⠀⠑⠄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢳⣾⡖⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠛⠃⠀⠠⣴⣦⠄⠀⠈⠝⠛⠅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⠁⠈⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣶⣿⠟⢻⣿⡄⠀⢠⣾⡿⠛⠿⣷⡄⠀⢰⣾⡿⠛⣿⣧⠀⠀⠿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠈⢀⣠⣼⣿⠃⠀⣾⡿⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⠀⠀⠁⣀⣴⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣰⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⣿⣷⠀⠀⢀⣿⡟⠀⢀⣾⡿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⣿⣿⣶⣶⣿⠿⠀⠘⢿⣷⣶⣿⠟⠁⠀⢸⣿⣷⣶⣾⡿⠇⠀⣶⣿
January 2021

A long long time ago, when Kripp was noLife

twitchquotes: A long long time ago, when Kripp was noLife, he stumbled across an old woman in an alleyway after buying some lentil soup. She told Kripp to give him the soup and in return he would find a beautiful girl. Unfortunately, Kripp didnt realize the old woman was the succubus Raina, who would eventually make him a simple casualarrians
twitch chat
November 2015
Kripp

I want to smash

twitchquotes: I want to smash. No, not sex, not even in a physical way. I want to sit down and play Super Smash Bros. Ultimate while laughing and having a good time. I want to play 1v1’s. I want to play on your team against lvl. 3 CPU’s. You can be Kirby. I can play Jigglypuff. No items.
twitch chat
February 2019

Super Smash Bros

Not your naked body

Team Liquid visited an orphanage in Taipei

twitchquotes: After their game, Team Liquid visited an orphanage in Taipei. "It's heartbreaking to see their sad little faces with no hope", said Charlie, age 6.
twitch chat
May 2019
Riot Games

Classic

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing