[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

YOU’VE BEEN FREAKING HIT BY THE KAWAII TRUCK

YOU’VE BEEN FREAKING HIT BY THE |^^^^^^^^^^^^](ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧ | KAWAII TRUCK | ‘|”“”;.., ___. |_…_…______===|= _|__|…, ] | ”(@ )’(@ )”“”“*|(@ )(@ )*****(@    ⊂(゚Д゚⊂⌒) NO KAWAII TRUCK NO!!! MOTHERFUCKER ONCE YOU'VE BEEN HIT, YOU HAVE TO HIT EIGHT FUCKING KAWAII ASS PEOPLE! IF YOU GET HIT AGAIN YOU’LL KNOW YOU'RE REALLY SO FUCKING KAWAII IT'S SO FUCKING SUGOI PEOPLE WILL PISS THEIR PANTS AND SHIT BRICKS AND YOU WILL BE THE MOTHERFUCKING LORD OF THE MOTHERFUCKING KAWAII! IF YOU BREAK THIS MOTHERFUCKING CHAIN, YOU'LL BE CURSED WITH UNKAWAIINESS AND SHITTINESS FOR 9000 YEARS SO PASS IT; HIT WHO EVER YOU THINK IS KAWAII.
October 2021

Weebs

Anime

Andrew Tides "The Turncloak" Biessnener was caught

twitchquotes: Andrew Tides "The Turncloak" Biessnener was caught today at Dulles Airport trying to fly to Moscow. He was found carrying top secret American Hearthstone decks built by Reynad. He planned on passing them to Russian KGB agent, Kolento Pistolev. As he was arrested Tides shouted, "Death to America!"
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

amogus is NOT funny

Oh so you said "AMOGUS". you think that's funny? well listen here you idiot, amogus is not funny. there is nothing funny about saying amogus. it just shows how braindead you are that a single misspelled word is what constitutes as humor for you. it is so dumb how you think that replying amogus to me makes you some sort of comedic genius. among us, is a DEAD game, and amogus is a STUPID meme. nobody cares about amogus, so stop sending stupid copypastas or making amogus jokes. you dont look funny, you look like an idiot, and dont make this into some stupid ironic copypasta ok?
May 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Quit my job from the burritos factory to play League

twitchquotes: Dear Qtipie Im Osvaldo Enchilada, Im from a very far away country named Mexico (the bornplace of fabbby) and I really want to become a pro, like you, Im gona quit my job from the burritos factory, and start playing, Im in silver IV but I will be challenger, and be a hero to my 7 childs, god bless and never stop burning those marijuanas boy.
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Both dudes

twitchquotes: (‿ˠ‿) _(‿ˠ‿) only the chosen one can fist both dudes . ⎝ KappaPride
twitch chat
October 2018

KappaPride

Text-to-Speech Playing