[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

There is no such thing as freedom of speech on Twitch

twitchquotes: There is no such thing as freedom of speech on Twitch. Freedom of speech means the Government can't police your speech. None of us are government actors. This is not a democracy, it's a dictatorship with the head of said dictatorship being the streamer and the enforcement of the dictators laws falling to the mods
twitch chat
July 2022

They weren't sus

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠛⠛⠛⡟⣿⣿⠛⡟⠛⠛⢛⡛⢿⡿⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⡇⣉⣉⠄⡇⢈⣉⣹⣷⡄⢡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣸⣿⣇⣿⣿⣀⣇⣈⣉⣉⣿⣇⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠛⣿⠟⢻⡿⢻⠛⣛⣛⣻⢛⣛⡛⢿⠛⣛⣛⣻⠛⢿⣿⢻⡛⣛⡛⢛⣛⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⠙⢰⡈⠇⣾⠄⣉⣉⣿⢈⣉⠁⣼⠄⣉⣉⣿⠄⣄⠻⢸⣾⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣀⣾⣧⣰⣿⣀⣉⣉⣹⣸⣿⣦⣸⣀⣉⣉⣹⣠⣿⣦⣸⣿⣿⣇⣸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠉⠉⠉⣿⡿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣻⣩⣉⠉⠉ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄ ⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠄⠉⠉⠉⣋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⢷⡀⠄⠄ ⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣾⣿⣷⣄⣀⣀⣀⣠⣄⣢⣤⣤⣾⣿⡀⠄ ⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣹⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⢁⣠ ⣿⣿⣄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⣉⣉⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣥⡀⠉⢁⡥⠈ ⣿⣿⣿⢹⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠒⠛⠛⠋⠉⠉⠛⢻⣿⣿⣷⢀⡭⣤⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⡼⣿⠷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣠⣿⣟⢷⢾⣊⠄⠄ ⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣈⣉⣭⣽⡿⠟⢉⢴⣿⡇⣺⣿⣷ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠐⢊⣡⣴⣾⣥⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠟⠋⠉⠉⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⠉⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠉⣿⣿⠿⠋⠉⠉⠉⠙⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⡏⠄⢾⣿⣿⣿⡄⣀⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣆⣀⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⣄⡀⠉⠉⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⣦⡀⠉⠉⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⠟⠻⣿⣿⣶⣶⡄⠄⢻⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄⣿⡟⠛⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⠄⢹⣿ ⣿⣇⠄⠙⠻⠿⠟⠃⢀⣾⣿⣄⠈⠛⠿⠿⠛⠄⣰⣿⣧⡀⠙⠻⠿⠿⠋⠄⣼⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Every night when I lie in bed, I think about Sneaky

twitchquotes: Every night when I lie in bed, I think about Sneaky naked. For each sexy thought, I stick one of my fingers up my tight moist butthole. I think about his soft ass flesh, tender yet firm. That's one finger. Next I think about his pale thighs, what they would feel like pounding against my anus. 2 fingers. Next up I think about that long, girthy, uncircumsized penis. 3 fingers. No more fingers will fit, so I prepare for my climax. I scream Sneaky's name as I cover my fishtank in warm lovejuice
twitch chat
November 2020
Sneaky

Silence the silenced watcher

twitchquotes: Silence the silenced watcher to counter the silence
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad

President Trump gave us Christmas back

twitchquotes: Today at Walmart I told the cashier Merry Christmas. She said, "Happy Holidays, ma'am, I smiled and said "You don't have to be afraid anymore. President Trump gave us Christmas back" she started crying tears of joy and said "Merry Christmas" and then everyone in the store applauded
twitch chat
December 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing