[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Long ago in a distant land, I, Aku

twitchquotes: Long ago in a distant land, I, Aku, the shapeshifting Master of Darkness, unleashed an unspeakable evil! But a foolish Samurai warrior, wielding a magic sword, stepped forth to oppose me. Before the final blow was struck, I tore open a portal in time and flung him into the future, where my evil is law! Now the fool seeks to return to the past, and undo the future that is Aku!
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June 2017

Hey Forsen how about some Brotherman Bill KKona

twitchquotes: KKona HEY KKona FORSEN KKona HOW KKona ABOUT KKona SOME KKona BROTHERMAN KKona BILL KKona
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October 2015
Forsen

Hey man, it's Mark from History 101

twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

OMG you're so FUNNY so quirky

😂😂OMG 😂 you’re so FUNNY 🤣 🤣 so quirky 👉👈 🤪 so different 🤩absolute crackhead energy 🤪🤪 comedic genius🧠 😂 I literally can’t ❌ breathe 😭 i’m crying dude 😭😭 that was so hilarious 😆 u really got the whole squad laughing 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦😂👩‍👩‍👦‍👦😂👨‍👨‍👧‍👦 high IQ comedy 🧠🧠 how’d you come up with that 🧐😂 really original work 😂 never seen 🙈 or heard 🙉 anything like that before 😂 😂 😂 great 👍 job 👍👍 keep up the funnies 👑🤣👑 i love you 💕 😘 you’re my inspiration 🤩🤩🤩 if only i were as funny 😄 or smart 🤓 or cool 😎 as you 😔 but its whatever I’ll continue to watch 👁👄👁 your content 🎥🤳 because it ❌NEVER EVER❌ fails to make me laugh 😂😂 thank you 🙏 for existing 😇 and doing what you do ❤️❤️
April 2022

Emoji Pasta

This gentleman's deck is ABSURD!

twitchquotes: ☑ “This gentleman's deck is ABSURD!” ☑ “My deck cannot hope to prevail against a deck of that caliber” ☑ "He REQUIRED those two cards in subsequent order to succeed" ☑ “He extracted from his deck the only cards capable of defeating me” ☑ "His cards defied logic" ☑ “There was no manoeuvre at my disposal to secure victory” ☑ “I played impeccably”
twitch chat
October 2014

Hearthstone

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

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