[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Is that your knee or you just excited to see me?

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) is that your knee or you just excited to see me? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

You have posted a bad meme

twitchquotes: Greetings. It appears as though you have posted a "bad meme". Now, it isn't too late to rectify your error! With these simple steps, you can redeem yourself int he eyes of your internet peers. 1) ctrl + w :)
twitch chat
December 2019

Germany scores on Brazil

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Every 60 seconds in Brazil, Germany scores a goal. Together we can stop this. Please spread the word ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie

PauseChamp

⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠂⠀ ⣿⣿⣯⣤⣤⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠀⣀⣀⡀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠿⠟⠉⠉⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⢉⣼⣿⣿⣿⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⣩⣤⣤⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠛⠛⠛⠛⢋⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠛⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣄⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃ ⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⣁⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⠏⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣤⣈⡻⠋⠁⠀⠀ ⣰⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠩⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⠉⠉⣿⣿⡶⠶⠶⢶⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⣻⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠈⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠄⠙⠛⠿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠞⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
September 2020

Please mod me I'm your mother

twitchquotes: Hey [insert streamer name] it's me. Your actual fucking MOTHER. I basically modded you throughout childhood so you might as well give me mod now. if you don't mod me you're basically calling yourself a failure as a human being. Make me proud of you.
twitch chat
March 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing