[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
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PogU

⠄⠄⢀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄⡀⠄ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶ ⠄⠄⠰⣿⠿⢋⣉⣀⣀⣤⣤⣭⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠛⠿⠿⢿⣿ ⠄⣠⣾⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣦⣤⡙ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⣟⣉⣡⣀⣂⣰⣬⣙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣛⡛⣛⠛⠿⢿⣿ ⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⣭⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠶⠶⢾⣦⣬⣿ ⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣤⣶⣦⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿ ⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠛⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠁⠄ ⣿⡆⠄⠄⡀⠄⣿⡇⠈⠒⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠛⣿⣿⠋⢀⠠⠄⢀ ⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⢾⣿⣿⣷⠄⠹⣷⣤⣤⣄⣀⣠⣶⣶⣦⣾⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾ ⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠈⠙⢿⣉⠄⠄⠉⠻⠿⢿⣿⠿⠋⠉⣿⣿⣟⣥⠄⢀⣰⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⠶⠄⢠⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⠿⢉⣿⣿⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿
April 2019

It starts with a surge of adrenaline

twitchquotes: It starts with a surge of adrenaline. Signals flood the nervous system. Pupils race back and forth behind closed eyelids. Then open. Now it’s up to you to decide what to do with it.
twitch chat
March 2019

Easter emoji pasta

HEY ALL U EASTER BUNNY🐰🐰🐰 HOES!!! Today is 🎉🎉Easter!! You know what that means🤔🤔🤔??? It’s time to HOP over to DADDYS house so he can FUCK😫😫💦💦💦 u like a rabbit!! Gotta get those Easter day cummies!! After u and daddy FUCK 😫💦 then it’s time for ⛪️church⛪️!!! Get ready for that HOLY DICK🍆🍆😍😍 because jesus is CUMMING😩🍆🍑💦 back from the dead today to FUCK THAT EASTER BUNNY PUSSY🐇😩🍆🍑😍💦😏😉. Then it’s time for the egg hunt 🕵🕵🕵!!! U better find an egg!! Search in every HOLE😘😩 CRACK 😫😍 and CREVICE 🤗😉😏 for the GRAND PRIZE 🤑😇 getting that 🏵🌸🌺PASTEL PUSSY🍑🍣🌮 RODE 🏇🏇🏇 into the Easter sunset! Send this to all ur other EASTER BUNNY🐰🐰🐰 HOES👄😫🍆💦. If u get 5️⃣ back ur a ROTTEN COLORED EGG!!! If u get 🔟 back ur a LOADED 💋👅🙌🏻😉😏💦💦 EASTER BASKET. If you get 2️⃣0️⃣ back? UR GETTIN FUCKED 😱🍆🍑💦💦IN UR RABBIT 🐰🐇🐰HOLE TONIGHT!!!!
April 2022

Holiday Emoji

Easter

Holiday

im such a nice guy, i deserve a girlfriend

twitchquotes: im such a nice guy, i deserve a girlfriend, yesterday i always commented how nice poki looked instead of making weird sexual comments like the weridos there
twitch chat
October 2020

Simps

what do you think the billions of dollars smell like

twitchquotes: Do you think that Jeff Bezos gets embarrassed when Twitch mobile has a 10 second delay in front of his billions of dollars? Sorry if this offends anyone but I thought it was a funny thing haha. And I would like to know if any of you have pics of Jeff Bezos looking nervous or embarrassed in front of chat I just want to see it for a few laughs haha. Another thing I am wondering is what do you think the billions of dollars smell like I am just curious for laughs haha I would like to smell them
twitch chat
July 2020
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