twitchquotes:I lost my virginity while listening to this song 5 years ago, it's a funny story really.. i had just finished my gym workout and i was in the locker room all sweaty, and in walks this leather dressed jabroni.. he seemed confused as to where he was.. i told him he might have gotten the wrong door, then he got very rude and said "fuck you", then i said "nah fuck you leatherman" and then things escalated from there
I lost my virginity while listening to this song 5 years ago, it's a funny story really.. i had just finished my gym workout and i was in the locker room all sweaty, and in walks this leather dressed jabroni.. he seemed confused as to where he was.. i told him he might have gotten the wrong door, then he got very rude and said "fuck you", then i said "nah fuck you leatherman" and then things escalated from there
YOURE (__)__)====D ONLY GAY IF YOU CRADLE BOTH BALLS ⎝ ⎝ Jebaited
I used to be a real ad
Mods, can you please confirm that this was an original photo taken by OP
Mods, can you please confirm that this was an original photo taken by OP, otherwise this post should be removed as per subreddit policy. There is no further context provided here, how do we know that they didn't find this picture somewhere else? This directly affects our enjoyment of the post.
Mods, can you please confirm that this was an original photo taken by OP, otherwise this post should be removed as per subreddit policy. There is no further context provided here, how do we know that they didn't find this picture somewhere else? This directly affects our enjoyment of the post.
Joker fursona bodyguard
twitchquotes:Okay CLEARLY sakurai is playing favorites already wtf. Joker is literally bayo, cloud, olimar put together. He gave him a GUN for gods sake and you LMFAO you can’t even hurt his fursona bodyguard ohmygod
Okay CLEARLY sakurai is playing favorites already wtf. Joker is literally bayo, cloud, olimar put together. He gave him a GUN for gods sake and you LMFAO you can’t even hurt his fursona bodyguard ohmygod
Why Attack on Titan is a flawed anime
As a big fan of AoT, one big plothole that has always bugged me from the first episode is the exclusion of genitals. As titans are very clearly based on humans, and canonically are created from humans, why did Isayama decide to exclude Titan genitals? I am not a homo, (I have 2 girl friends) but seeing Eren transform into a titan with a 12 foot long cock as the people of Marley watch in horror would easily made this anime my favourite of all time. I think we should cancel Isayama on Twitter and get him to realise his mistake and redraw his previous chapters accurately.
As a big fan of AoT, one big plothole that has always bugged me from the first episode is the exclusion of genitals. As titans are very clearly based on humans, and canonically are created from humans, why did Isayama decide to exclude Titan genitals? I am not a homo, (I have 2 girl friends) but seeing Eren transform into a titan with a 12 foot long cock as the people of Marley watch in horror would easily made this anime my favourite of all time. I think we should cancel Isayama on Twitter and get him to realise his mistake and redraw his previous chapters accurately.
I used to be a real ad
Now THAT is what I call RUSSIAN MEDDLING!
twitchquotes:Had a colonoscopy today. My doctor was actually Russian. Now THAT is what I call RUSSIAN MEDDLING! They put me to sleep w/ same stuff Michael Jackon used. When I woke up, I MOON-walked right out of the hospital!
Had a colonoscopy today. My doctor was actually Russian. Now THAT is what I call RUSSIAN MEDDLING! They put me to sleep w/ same stuff Michael Jackon used. When I woke up, I MOON-walked right out of the hospital!
I once knew this man. He was from the ocean
twitchquotes:I once knew this man. He was from the ocean. He did very Ocean-y things. He took me by the hand to take me to the land that you understand. He was the crust of a tan man imbibed by the sand, Soaking up the thirst of the land. Soaking up the thirst of the land. His Shin was in the shape of an "O". Don't know what to call him though...any ideas?
I once knew this man. He was from the ocean. He did very Ocean-y things. He took me by the hand to take me to the land that you understand. He was the crust of a tan man imbibed by the sand, Soaking up the thirst of the land. Soaking up the thirst of the land. His Shin was in the shape of an "O". Don't know what to call him though...any ideas?
Kripparian here with VEGAN FACTS
twitchquotes:Hi guys Kripp here with VEGAN FACTS! Did you know that milk is literally !Worse Than Hitler! and also killed many people during the Twitch Chat-ocaust in the 1940's? If you drink milk your bones will be as frail as Reynad's Rag RNG and you'll basically be Leifman's brother. Well, that's all for today's vegan facts! Bye guys! BRO FIST!!
Hi guys Kripp here with VEGAN FACTS! Did you know that milk is literally !Worse Than Hitler! and also killed many people during the Twitch Chat-ocaust in the 1940's? If you drink milk your bones will be as frail as Reynad's Rag RNG and you'll basically be Leifman's brother. Well, that's all for today's vegan facts! Bye guys! BRO FIST!!
Sigma male schedule
2:00 am- Wake up
2.05am-Cold shower
2.15am-breakfast,almonds, breast milk bought off Facebook, 50mg adderall
2:30am- begin workout,incline bench 2 plates,12x12 with 30 seconds of rest, no warmup.
2:45am-edging,4hrs (for disipline)
6:45am-cold shower
7:00am-begin sprint to work
8:00am-arrive at work
8:05am-get called into boss' office
8:06am-get fired from job for "repeated inappropriate comments" and "predatory behaviour"
8:10am-sprint back home
9:10am- lunch-raw cod, berries foraged on the way home, small pebbles (for digestion),50mg of adderal
9:10am-edging(as punishment)
3:00pm- bed time
2:00 am- Wake up
2.05am-Cold shower
2.15am-breakfast,almonds, breast milk bought off Facebook, 50mg adderall
2:30am- begin workout,incline bench 2 plates,12x12 with 30 seconds of rest, no warmup.
2:45am-edging,4hrs (for disipline)
6:45am-cold shower
7:00am-begin sprint to work
8:00am-arrive at work
8:05am-get called into boss' office
8:06am-get fired from job for "repeated inappropriate comments" and "predatory behaviour"
8:10am-sprint back home
9:10am- lunch-raw cod, berries foraged on the way home, small pebbles (for digestion),50mg of adderal
9:10am-edging(as punishment)
3:00pm- bed time
I’m paying to shoot like Wardell not Whiffdell
📞Hello?📞Is this the OP Academy?📞I would like a refund please📞I’m paying to shoot like Wardell not Whiffdell📞He do miss📞
📞Hello?📞Is this the OP Academy?📞I would like a refund please📞I’m paying to shoot like Wardell not Whiffdell📞He do miss📞
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
Bullish market makes me hard
When the stocks 📊📝 go up 📈💸, my dick goes too 🍆⬆️😳. Bullish 🐂 market 🏬 makes me hard 🦴💦. All the countries 🏳️🏴🏴☠️🏁🚩🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇺🇳 try to recover 🔄 from corona 🦠 so the money 💰💵💸 flows 🌬 into my pocket 💳. Soon 🔜 there will be a crash 📉😭🥺😖 and the bears 🐻 will crawl 🚼 out of their holes 🕳. Then they cut off my greedy dick ✂️🍆🩸 if I don’t ❌ eat ’em out 👅😸. I must turn into a bear 🐂➡️🐻 and make 🤌🏼 more money 💰💵💸 and eat some honey 🐻🍯. When I’m done ✅ I’ll throw a party 🎉🍷🍾 and eat your ass 👅🍑.
When the stocks 📊📝 go up 📈💸, my dick goes too 🍆⬆️😳. Bullish 🐂 market 🏬 makes me hard 🦴💦. All the countries 🏳️🏴🏴☠️🏁🚩🏳️🌈🏳️⚧️🇺🇳 try to recover 🔄 from corona 🦠 so the money 💰💵💸 flows 🌬 into my pocket 💳. Soon 🔜 there will be a crash 📉😭🥺😖 and the bears 🐻 will crawl 🚼 out of their holes 🕳. Then they cut off my greedy dick ✂️🍆🩸 if I don’t ❌ eat ’em out 👅😸. I must turn into a bear 🐂➡️🐻 and make 🤌🏼 more money 💰💵💸 and eat some honey 🐻🍯. When I’m done ✅ I’ll throw a party 🎉🍷🍾 and eat your ass 👅🍑.
Kermit the frog caused 9/11. In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alternate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene, however they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
Kermit the frog caused 9/11. In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alternate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene, however they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
THINKING
twitchquotes:Every day rushing through my head, like a river that only runs red, Every night when I lay in my bed, I remember every word that you said, I try to stop myself from thinking, And yet I find myself sinking, Deeper and deeper, your lies blinking in my mind, Crushing the only inkling of hope I never knew I could find, On and on these horrible thoughts I can't stop myself, Pulled out of my head like some kind of deranged shelf, I just had anal sex with a gay elf
Every day rushing through my head, like a river that only runs red, Every night when I lay in my bed, I remember every word that you said, I try to stop myself from thinking, And yet I find myself sinking, Deeper and deeper, your lies blinking in my mind, Crushing the only inkling of hope I never knew I could find, On and on these horrible thoughts I can't stop myself, Pulled out of my head like some kind of deranged shelf, I just had anal sex with a gay elf
Every 60 seconds in Murica, 60000 burgers are digested
Decided I will no longer be paying taxes. What are they gonna do, tax me more? Go ahead.
I wont pay those either
Oh im going to prison?
The one paid for by my tax dollars?
Sorry. Didn't pay em. Now there is no prison.
I am at least 3 steps ahead of the government at all times.
Decided I will no longer be paying taxes. What are they gonna do, tax me more? Go ahead.
I wont pay those either
Oh im going to prison?
The one paid for by my tax dollars?
Sorry. Didn't pay em. Now there is no prison.
I am at least 3 steps ahead of the government at all times.
voting booth inspection is not required
twitchquotes:So I was waiting in line to vote when all of a sudden this voting "official" came up to me and said that there was something wrong with my voter registration and asked me to follow him to the back. When we went around back he said that I had to take off my pants and show my cock because penis size is the most accurate way to confirm voter identity. Because I thought he was a voting official I swiftly removed my pants and underwear to show him my member. After he fondled it for a bit he said it was good and I could go back into the line. It was only after I voted I realized that he forgot to check my balls too!!! He was obviously not certified to check such an area and I immediately contacted the security guards about his presence. Please do not fall for any tricks like I did! stay safe and happy voting!
So I was waiting in line to vote when all of a sudden this voting "official" came up to me and said that there was something wrong with my voter registration and asked me to follow him to the back. When we went around back he said that I had to take off my pants and show my cock because penis size is the most accurate way to confirm voter identity. Because I thought he was a voting official I swiftly removed my pants and underwear to show him my member. After he fondled it for a bit he said it was good and I could go back into the line. It was only after I voted I realized that he forgot to check my balls too!!! He was obviously not certified to check such an area and I immediately contacted the security guards about his presence. Please do not fall for any tricks like I did! stay safe and happy voting!
if u finish reading this monkaW
twitchquotes:Hey Byron, I noticed you like to run comps around Aurelion Sol and I went ahead and did the math on a level 3 Aurelion Sol with Spear of Shojin and Zeke's buff and it turns out that if you finish reading this everyone in chat will be dead in the next 5 minutes monkaW
Hey Byron, I noticed you like to run comps around Aurelion Sol and I went ahead and did the math on a level 3 Aurelion Sol with Spear of Shojin and Zeke's buff and it turns out that if you finish reading this everyone in chat will be dead in the next 5 minutes monkaW
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum?
Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum guys? My parents stumbled on this sub the other day and now I'm not even allowed to access Reddit anymore because of the sex talk they saw in here. This is not a peepee, poopoo and vajayjay fun house. We are not heathens whose only role in life is to fornicate and laugh about fornication and then ejaculate that nonsense, spurting and spewing this so called "humor" on each other like animals. This is a place of worship. Meme worship. God is not pleased with you all. Repent.
Can we keep the sexual posts to a fucking minimum guys? My parents stumbled on this sub the other day and now I'm not even allowed to access Reddit anymore because of the sex talk they saw in here. This is not a peepee, poopoo and vajayjay fun house. We are not heathens whose only role in life is to fornicate and laugh about fornication and then ejaculate that nonsense, spurting and spewing this so called "humor" on each other like animals. This is a place of worship. Meme worship. God is not pleased with you all. Repent.
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