[Copypasta] I want to fuck the Samsung girl

Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Dear Person in the chat, you are beautiful

twitchquotes: (◕‿◕✿) Dear Person in the chat, you are beautiful. Whatever is going on in your life right now, please know that you matter and your story is important. You are loved (◕‿◕✿)
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp

SCANNING FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE ASKED

🚨 SCANNING 💽 FOR PEOPLE WHO HAVE ASKED 🚨 25% COMPLETE 🕒 50% COMPLETE 🕕 75% COMPLETE 🕘 ❗ERROR❗ THIS SCAN HAS FOUND ❌ NO ❌ PERSON(S) WITHIN A 1000 KM RADIUS WHO ASKED.
October 2021

Who Asked?

Cum bee

⣿⡟⠀⢸⣿⣷⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⢸⣿ ⣿⣀⣀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⣶⣦⡀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⠀⠀⢰⠄⢠⣼⣟ ⠛⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠻⠶⢤⣀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣶⣦⡄⠉⣿⡦⠀⠀⠸⠉⠀⠉ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣉⠷⣦⡈⠙⠛⠿⠟⠀⠀⠁⠀⠐⢠⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣀⣶⠿⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠁⠀⠀⠙⣶⣤⠠⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂⠚⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠰⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣴⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡞⠋⠙⠲⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠳⠛⠛⠛⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣤⡀⠀⢀⠐⠒ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣷⣮⣿⣿ ⣀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⡉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿ ⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⡿⠟⣉⣀⣤⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣦⣄⡀⠀⠈⢿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠿⣾⣿⠛⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⢻⣿⡆⠀⠸⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⢶⣶⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣶⣿⠟⠁⠀⢠⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿ ⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣧⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿
October 2021

You think it’s funny to take screenshots of people’s NFTs, huh?

You think it’s funny to take screenshots of people’s NFTs, huh? You must be a very immature person to steal someone’s property that they PAID for. Yeah, I said it. You’re the kind of person who thinks that property theft (a seriously illegal offence) is a joke. I don’t even know why you took that screenshot, because you didn’t pay 1000 dollars for it. I did. The blockchain doesn’t lie. Even if you try to save it, it’s my property. You’re just angry that you couldn’t afford this priceless masterpiece. Even if you could, your fingers couldn’t even click fast enough to get one of the 10000 NFTs sold. You’re just mad you don’t own what I own. So, delete that screenshot, or I swear, you’ll be hearing from my lawyers.
November 2021

Cryptocurrency

NFTs

Kurumx

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠉⢹⡿⠫⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠙⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠈⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠈⠎⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣻ ⣿⣿⣯⢰⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠿⠛⠻⠻⠻⢿⣿⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾ ⣿⡿⢿⡀⠄⠄⠈⠉⠻⠋⣧⠄⢀⠈⠉⠈⢀⣀⣤⣤⠄⠄⣀⣴⡦⣨⢻ ⣿⣧⣤⣭⡄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣦⢙⣿⣦⣼⣶⡿⣼⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⢻⣿⣯⣿ ⣿⣿⣝⣿⠏⢀⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣦⣭⣭⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢵⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠓⠺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⡥⣬⣿⣿⠋⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠁⠄⠄⣊⣊⣐⣀⠄⢹⣿⣿⠿⢣⣲⣴⣿⣿⠄⠄⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠈⣍⣭⣿⣿⡟⠈⠁⢲⣡⡤⡙⢾⢿⣿⣶⣶⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠈⠿⠟⠟⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣲⣿⣿⣿⡻⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿
February 2021
Kurumx

Teamfight Tactics

Text-to-Speech Playing