[Copypasta] I want to fuck the Samsung girl

Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Warrior vs warrior

twitchquotes: HEH, GREETINGS ResidentSleeper ARMOR UP ResidentSleeper ARMOR UP ResidentSleeper I can take the hit ResidentSleeper Welcome to the grand tournament ResidentSleeper TANK UP ResidentSleeper TANK UP ResidentSleeper I'M OUT OF CARDS
twitch chat
March 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

Kill cummand face, huntard hardest deck in the game

twitchquotes: reynad is deep in thought. 'do i play my overpowered dog card now or later?'. he makes the misplay but it doesn't matter. he kill cummands the face. hardest deck in the game.
twitch chat
April 2014
Reynad

Mario

▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▄▄▄▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ ▒▒▒▒▒▒▄▀▀▓▓▓▀█▒▒▒▒▒▒ ▒▒▒▒▄▀▓▓▄██████▄▒▒▒▒ ▒▒▒▄█▄█▀░░▄░▄░█▀▒▒▒▒ ▒▒▄▀░██▄░░▀░▀░▀▄▒▒▒▒ ▒▒▀▄░░▀░▄█▄▄░░▄█▄▒▒▒ ▒▒▒▒▀█▄▄░░▀▀▀█▀▒▒▒▒▒ ▒▒▒▄▀▓▓▓▀██▀▀█▄▀▀▄▒▒ ▒▒█▓▓▄▀▀▀▄█▄▓▓▀█░█▒▒ ▒▒▀▄█░░░░░█▀▀▄▄▀█▒▒▒ ▒▒▒▄▀▀▄▄▄██▄▄█▀▓▓█▒▒ ▒▒█▀▓█████████▓▓▓█▒▒ ▒▒█▓▓██▀▀▀▒▒▒▀▄▄█▀▒▒ ▒▒▒▀▀▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒
November 2014

Hey reckful’s brain, reckful’s chat here

twitchquotes: Hey reckful’s brain, reckful’s chat here. The way you make reckful sad all the time is not very cash money of you. I don’t think it’s very considerate of you to make reckful feel this way. He already has a hard time with being bipolar, why are you so mean to reckful? I try to make him happy but you do not make it easy. Reckful is a good guy and doesn’t need you in his head all the time making things harder. Fix your chemical imbalance brain, it will make everyone feel better.
twitch chat
August 2019
Reckful

THIS USED TO BE A 2016 STREAM

twitchquotes: FeelsBadMan THIS USED TO BE A 2016 STREAM FeelsBadMan THIS USED TO BE A 2016 STREAM FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
January 2017
Text-to-Speech Playing