Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.
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mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition
I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale.
It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other.
But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum.
All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse.
We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
Taking my mods for a walk
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imaqtpie
Ninja Mixer announcement
twitchquotes:
I know this may come as a shock to many of you, but, as of today, i will be streaming exclusively on Mixer. I know, i know, it's exciting. You know, i feel like this is a really good chance to get back in touch with my roots, and really remember why i fell in love with streaming in the first place.
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Ninja
2 crewmates with long legs
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Among Us / Amogus
If any of you copy and paste this you will be in serious trouble
twitchquotes:
ᶦ ˢʷᵉᵃʳ ᵗᵒ ᵍᵒᵈ ᶦᶠ ᵃᶰʸ ᵒᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ᵐᵒᵗʰᵉʳʳᶠᵘᶜᵏᵉʳˢ ᶜᵒᵖʸ ᵃᶰᵈ ᵖᵃˢᵗᵉ ᵗʰᶦˢ ʸᵒᵘ ʷᶦᶫᶫ ᵇᵉ ᶦᶰ ˢᵉʳᶦᵒᵘˢ ᵗʳᵒᵘᵇᶫᵉ
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