[Copypasta] I want to fuck the Samsung girl

Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Gotta love making jokes with my friends bro

I was driving with a friend I grab his leg instead of the gearstick We both laugh and I unzip his pants I park the car while fondling with his balls, my friend is laughing because he knows it's a joke and we're just friends I start sucking his dick and was about to choke on it because I'm laughing so hard My friend is also laughing his ass off, he starts making train noise while yelling "BROJOB BROJOB CHOO CHOO" He then cums and then I swallow it all and kiss him while both laughing cuz we know it's a joke. Gotta love making jokes with my friends bro.
May 2022

Our Greatest Gratitude for Your Invaluable Advice

twitchquotes: On behalf of the streamer and whole chat I would like to extend our greatest gratitude for your invaluable advice for this hardstuck challenger player, since he is never able to make proper itemization choices on his own! Your participation in making this channel and streamers game better, will never be forgotten!
twitch chat
May 2022

League of Legends

The true glory of Moonmoon's improvised story-telling

twitchquotes: Wow. Just wow. After witnessing the true glory of improvised story-telling as presented by MOONMOON_OW, my life has changed to such a degree that I am no longer able to sleep soundly, knowing that there are people out there who are still trying to do just as good. It is no surprise; the god gamer, also a god roleplayer, is truly astounding with his ability. - Barrack Obama
twitch chat
May 2019
MOONMOON

EZ Clap

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⢩⣴⣶⣶⣶⣌⠙⠫⠛⢋⣭⣤⣤⣤⣤⡙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢡⣾⣿⠿⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⡳⠆⢻⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠷⡌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣰⣿⣿⣴⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠒⠄⢶⣶⣶⣾⡿⠶⠒⠲⠌⢻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠏⣡⢨⣝⡻⠿⣿⢛⣩⡵⠞⡫⠭⠭⣭⠭⠤⠈⠭⠒⣒⠩⠭⠭⣍⠒⠈⠛ ⡿⢁⣾⣿⣸⣿⣿⣷⣬⡉⠁⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣶⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀ ⢡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣿⣦⣤⣀⣀⣀⣀⠄⣤⣾ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⡶⢇⣰⣿⣿⣟⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠁⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢛⡛⠿⠿⣿⣧⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣼⣿⣿⣿⣧⠸⣿⣿ ⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢿⡿⠿⠦⣤⣈⣙⡛⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠛⡀⢻⣿ ⠄⠄⠉⠻⢿⣿⣿⣷⣬⣙⠳⠶⢶⣤⣍⣙⡛⠓⠒⠶⠶⠶⠶⠖⢒⣛⣛⠁⣾⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣈⣉⣛⣛⣛⡛⠛⠛⠿⠿⠿⠟⢋⣼⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠃⠄⠙⠛⠿⢿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢬⣭⣭⡶⠖⣢⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢰⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿
January 2020

Pepe

Privyet, Komrade Toast!

twitchquotes: Privyet, Komrade Toast! Is your cousin Dmitri from Mother Russia! I am of hearing that you make much moneys by playing simplistic chess game for toddlers and whining like little baby in front of thousands of simpletons! BLYAT! You should play game for REAL man like Counterstrike Go! Already I am recruit by man with enormous forehead for professional team Tampon Storm and will be winning many tournaments, yes! Don't be a cyka, you capitalist pig, and stop crying like baby! Love, Dmitri.
twitch chat
July 2019
DisguisedToast

Teamfight Tactics

Text-to-Speech Playing