Popular Copypastas

My son (14) watches a lot of video game streamers on Twitch.tv. I personally don't find them entertaining but I can understand why some people (like my son) do. Over the past month he's starting using terms like "pog", "jabaited", and "Kappa" which I guess are terms that are used in the scope of Twitch. I don't have an issue with my son using these terms but it's gotten to the point where every sentence is Twitchspeak. We were having dinner and my daughter (age 12) was talking about how she got accepted for a summer program with the local animal shelter, and my son said "Pog you, easy clap". I told him that it was getting out of hand and that he would have to communicate normally to his parents and family. To that he said "Weird champ, feels weird man, normies omega LOL." Until he learns to communicate like a normal human being I've blacklisted Twitch from the internet for the time being. He's hysterical now but I told him that I would unblacklist it if he stopped using twitchspeak, but he's refusing to stop so for now it's banned. AITA?

No one: Not a single soul: This video: exists This comment: hold my beer Me: so you have chosen death Death: that's a big yikes from me dawg Also death: I wasn't expecting special forces Me: mom can we have death Mom: we already have death at home Death at home: surprised pikachu face This video literally makes me cry every time Who else is watching this in ???? This video: wait that's illegal Also this video: why do I hear boss music??? Thumbs up so he sees this comment in 14 years when this video gets recommended! Edit: thanks for the likes XD

I-I want your creamy warm cum inside of me I-I want u to choke me and use toys like vibrators~! I want to feel you deep down inside of me I want u to make me scream~ I want u to give me hickeys and bruises all over i-i want u to give it to me hard and dont hold back I wanna be soaked in your cum and my sweat I want u to fuck me for days and hours please daddy’s please! I-I want u t-to use all your s-sex toys on me e-every s-single o-one t-the vibrater t-the sex s-swing t-the whips a-all of t-them~ A-ah shit... Y-your cock is so big and in my ass already~? Mnn... Faster... Harder! Turn me into your dream slut~! Penetrate me until i burst! Mmmm~ Soothe me~ Caress me~ Fuck me~ Breed me~ Probe your thick, wet, throbbing cock deeper and deeper into my pussy Ahhh... Ahhh~ I-Im cumming Im cumming! Cum with me too! Drench me! Ill do the same~ Ill swallow your sticky essence along with you~ Im your personal cumbucket~!! I want you to touch me real good. damn..~ beat me I want you to make me leak and cum inside me I hope you cum all over me..pleasure me real good..~ you make me wet all day..~ eat me all you want...~ D..daddy..~ your going too f..fast..~ H..harder..!~You make me feel wet everyday..~A..ah..!! D..daddy..~ g..go rough..~ A..ahh..!!~ M..mm..~ I..I’m going to leak..!!~ A..ah..!~ G..gentle..~! Ahh..~ j..just a little deeper daddy!~ p..punish me d..daddy..~ I.. I. Feel so wet and j...juicy.~ mhmmmm~ to- to hard.. ahhhh~ m.. more p-please~!

It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to-penis contact was made I felt a shockwave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now.. 3 hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out

So I was having online classes with my camera turned off when I started hearing a little whistle from one of the students in the background that seemed very familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. The whistling stopped for a couple of minutes until I started hearing it again, and then I knew exactly what it was: it was the chorus of Dream's hit song 'Mask'. I immediately ripped off all my clothes and started furiously stroking my fully erect penis for a good 10 min, even sticking my Dream body pillow up my rectum, imagining that it was Daddy Dream penetrating me while whistling his hit song 'Mask'. It honestly were the greatest 10 minutes of my life, until my libido reached its climax and I let out a gigaload of cum for Daddy Dream that landed on the phone's screen and ended up turning on the mic and camera, and everyone stared horrified at me, screaming at the sight of my honest and earnest love expression to Dream. I was kicked out of the class by the dreamphobic teacher, and today the school principal called me and my parents to a meeting and told us that I may be expelled from the school, merely from expressing my gender and sexuality. What can I do about this?!?!? Was I in the wrong for expressing my gender and identity??!? (Only serious answers, please).