[Copypasta] It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked...

It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to-penis contact was made I felt a shockwave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now.. 3 hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out
March 2017

Classic

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Greggnog

First off: I am not joking. I wish I was joking. I've been with my wonderful boyfriend Greg for over 4 years now, and this Christmas was our third spent together. He's so much fun to be around, handsome, charming, and our sex life is great. Except for one small problem. Every year now starting in December he starts referring to his cum as "Greggnog." When I first heard him say this, it was in the context of a joke, so I laughed, and then I forgot about it. A few days after this, we're exchanging some spicy texts before he gets home from work he says to me, in all seriousness, "I can't wait to pour Greggnog all over your face." I could not believe he just said that to me, but I didn't know what else to do at the time but go along with it. Fast forward to this December. This phrase re-enters his vocabulary at the same time every year. It makes me cringe beyond belief, but until this year he used it sparingly enough for me to just be able to laugh and say "shut the fuck up." I'm sure that 2020 has done at least some irreparable psychic damage to all people, but unfortunately, for my boyfriend, this has manifested in the form of him referring to his cum as "Greggnog" non-stop. This month he has been using the term almost exclusively, in all contexts, and it is driving me batshit insane. I sat him down to talk last week, and I asked him very clearly and directly to stop. At the time, he said he would, and it did slow down for a few days, but it is now four days after Christmas and he's back at it again with no end in sight. He absolutely means the world to me, and I saw myself spending the rest of my life with him, but I have serious doubts now whether or not I can if every Christmas is going to be like this. So please, reddit, what do I do to make this stop for good?
December 2020

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Moon emoji blob

๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŽฉ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ˜๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ’๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ˜๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ“๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ–๐ŸŒ‘๐Ÿ‘๐ŸŒ‘๐Ÿ‘๐ŸŒ“๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ—๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ‘๐Ÿ‘„๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ”๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ˜๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ’๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ˜๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŽ€๐ŸŒ“๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ˜๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ”๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ˜๐ŸŒ”๐Ÿ†๐ŸŒ‘๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ–๐ŸŒ’๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ—๐ŸŒ’๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ—๐ŸŒ“๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ—๐ŸŒ“๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ˜๐ŸŒ”๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ—๐ŸŒ“๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ• ๐ŸŒ•๐Ÿ‘ ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐Ÿ‘ ๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•๐ŸŒ•
February 2021

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Team Liquid visited an orphanage in Taipei

twitchquotes: After their game, Team Liquid visited an orphanage in Taipei. "It's heartbreaking to see their sad little faces with no hope", said Charlie, age 6.
twitch chat
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League of Legends

Reynad's mother messages Reynad

twitchquotes: Greeting Andrey, this is your Mother. I heard earlier that you "maybe" 420 blaze it. I am very concerned. I dont like that Jeffery boy and I dont think you should hang out with him anymore. I hope the rest of you concerned mothers in twitch chat will copy paste this so my son will see..
twitch chat
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Reynad

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some times i supper glue my thumbs

twitchquotes: some times i supper glue my thumbs to my nipples and pretend im a t rex
twitch chat
June 2018

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Text-to-Speech Playing