[Copypasta] It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked...

It has been 4 hours since I successfully sucked my own penis. Things are different now. As soon as mouth-to-penis contact was made I felt a shockwave through my body. I have reason to believe I have super strength and telekinesis now.. 3 hours after contact I noticed a van parked on my street but no one has entered or exited the car since its arrival. I fear for my safety, I'm not sure what sort of power I may have stumbled upon but it's possible that the government has found out
March 2017

Classic

What happened to this ad? :(
More Classic Copypastas

Wasting time on Twitch, must be me

twitchquotes: No job βœ”οΈ 4Head No girlfriend βœ”οΈ 4Head No friends βœ”οΈ 4Head No talents βœ”οΈ 4Head Wasting time on Twitch βœ”οΈ 4Head Must be me 4Head
twitch chat
May 2017

Classic

Let's build a ladder

twitchquotes: ╠═══╣Lets build a ladder╠═══╣
twitch chat
April 2015

Classic

Give me another burger OpieOP

twitchquotes: OpieOP EU is so ba... OpieOP wait let me take a breath OpieOP EU is s... OpieOP i need to take another one OpieOP fk give me another burger OpieOP
twitch chat
April 2016

Classic

EU vs NA

Please stop spamming, for Bernard

twitchquotes: Guys please stop spamming. My dog, Bernard, looked at my chat and got so dizzy because of the spam that he fell down and hit his noggin right on his food bowl! He couldn't talk for hours. Please stop spamming, for Bernard.
twitch chat
December 2014

Classic

You need a high IQ to understand Rick and Morty

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation - his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realize that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike Rick and Morty truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rick's existencial catchphrase "Wubba Lubba Dub Dub," which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as Dan Harmon's genius unfolds itself on their television screens. What fools... how I pity them. πŸ˜‚ And yes by the way, I DO have a Rick and Morty tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
September 2017

Rick and Morty

Classic

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