[Copypasta] I have gotten the covid vaccine about 20 times now

I have gotten the covid vaccine about 20 times now. 4 Pfizer, 12 moderna, 4 Johnson. Once I got my first vaccine, I started cravings for it. There is something so great knowing I am reducing the spread of the coronavirus with each of them. I am feeling so empowered. I think I may be addicted ngl :sweat_smile:. At least it won't kill me.
June 2021

Coronavirus

Classic

COVID

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Will you be my Quaran-TINE?

twitchquotes: Dear Streamer, please forgive my fever and the coughing of my lungs. Ever since I first entered stream I fell for the way you entertained and captivated the chat. I adored the way you practiced social distancing, responsibly purchased toilet paper, and wore a mask at all times. It is so contagious! Everything that I have witnessed has made my body ache for your pathogens. As your simping loyal petri dish, will you be my Quaran-TINE?
twitch chat
March 2020

Simps

Coronavirus

COVID

WHO let the dogs out

twitchquotes: BREAKING: The World Health Organization has announced that dogs cannot contract Covid-19. Dogs previously held in quarantine can now be released. To be clear, WHO let the dogs out.
twitch chat
March 2020

Coronavirus

COVID

Lord Microsoft

10:43 PM, Microsoft Tower, Washington. A figure stands in shadow, red lights from the theistic ceiling flood the spacious hall. Along the sides, hallmark pieces of technology are proudly displayed on golden pedestals. The Xbox, Windows, Hololens; At the center of it all, the vaccine. "Microsoft Microbe Covid-19" the label on the syringe reads. A glowing substance can be seen sitting still inside. Monitors flicker to life at the end of the hall, each one showing the point of view of an innocent civilian. The light draws a silhouette of a man. His body, frail. His skin is leathery and rugged. Breathing apparatus cover his face, a cold green mist slowly spewing out. The grand door opens, humanoids armed with weapons drag an unkempt and furious man towards the being in shadow. They throw him to the floor, spit slathering the ground. "This is the last one?" the figure asks. "Yes, Lord Microsoft. all 4,607,423,673 other citizens have been accounted for." The rugged man looks upwards, his face bloodied and bruised. His eyes meet Lord Microsoft's. Puffed from tears, his eyes can only show one emotion: anger. "Bill Gates, you piece of shit. I swore to Samantha that if I ever-" "Silence, creature!" Lord Microsoft slaps him with the back of his hand. "I am lord Microsoft, and you will refer to me as such!" The guards grab the man, hoisting him up. "Now, let us delay no further. It has taken me years to get to this point, and I will not have my victory denied!" Lord Microsoft grabs the vaccine and primes it for injection. "Such a small thing, isn't it? Yet, it has afforded me the right to dominate all life on Earth. Covid was a blessing, not a curse." The man's eyes widened, he screams in retaliation, but the guards shut his mouth with force. Lord Microsoft pierces his flesh with the needle. A flourescent orange liquid can be seen coursing through his veins. He falls to the floor, his muscles tightening and constricting in unnatural fashion. His eyes bulge from his skull and he shouts in pain. He slumps over, and in only a moment he comes back to his feet. His pupils dilated and his skin, pale. "How may I serve you, my lord."
August 2021

COVID

Coronavirus

ACHOO uh oh you just got the Delta variant!

ACHOOโ€ผ๏ธ๐Ÿคง๐ŸคงWhat was thatโ‰๏ธโ‰๏ธ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜Uh-oh ๐Ÿ˜ฏ looks like you just got ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€ the Delta variant! ๐Ÿ™€๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ Donโ€™t you know ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธโ‰๏ธ๐Ÿคข๐Ÿค•๐Ÿค’๐Ÿคค the world ๐ŸŒ HOE Organization ๐Ÿ™ˆ๐Ÿ‘… called it the most DOMINANT ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผ strain since the start of the ๐Ÿ—“ PANTIE-DEMIC ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘ˆ No more touching daddy ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ ๐Ÿง“๐Ÿผ until you wash ๐Ÿงฝ๐Ÿงฝyour dirty ๐Ÿพnasty ๐Ÿคข little ๐Ÿคž๐Ÿผfingers โœ‹๐Ÿป๐Ÿคš๐Ÿปโœ‹๐Ÿป๐Ÿคš๐Ÿปfor 6๏ธโƒฃ9๏ธโƒฃ seconds with sHOEp ๐Ÿงผ and water ๐Ÿ’ง ๐Ÿ‘… otherwise it doesnโ€™t count ๐Ÿคก๐Ÿคก๐Ÿคก Time to stop ๐Ÿ›‘ spreading the germs ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿฅด๐Ÿค’and start spreading ๐Ÿ˜งyour legs๐Ÿคค๐Ÿฆถ๐Ÿฝ๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿปbecause everyone ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿฆฐ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿซ๐Ÿฆน๐Ÿพโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿงœ๐Ÿผโ€โ™‚๏ธhas to keep TWERKING ๐Ÿ˜ˆ๐Ÿ˜ˆfrom home! ๐Ÿก SEND THIS TO 1๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ other coronavirus cucks ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿพ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿปotherwise Fuckboy Fauci ๐Ÿ™€๐Ÿ™€ is cumming for you ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ†
August 2021

Emoji Pasta

Coronavirus

COVID

The year is 2043 Covid variant phi beta epsilon is ravaging 0.0026% of the population

The year is 2043 Covid variant phi beta epsilon is ravaging 0.0026% of the population, you go outside for your government mandated 30 minute exercise, it's 1 a.m. not the best time, but they alternate your schedule so eventually everyone does get some sunlight. You quadruple mask and put on your plastic helmet. You gaze longingly at the sky. A man riding his bicycle points his flashlight at you "Why aren't you doing your stretches and cardio?" He asks, you recognize him as your neighbor (maybe, it's been some time since you last saw anyone). "It's because of people like you not obeying that the lockdowns have been extended another 4 years." He mumbles through his layers of masks. He reports you to AlphabetGoogle and your social credit score drops 5 points, good luck buying bread this week.
August 2021

COVID

Coronavirus

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