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So last weekend I was walking in WalMart and saw Trump

twitchquotes: So last weekend I was walking in WalMart and saw Trump... which was pretty cool. I was wondering why he was in the "woman's hygeine" section of the store.... He caught on to what I was thinking and held up some tampons. "For my girlfriend", he said, giggling nervously. But he doesn't have a GF. I think they were for HIM!
twitch chat
October 2014
Trump

Every game is equally pointless

twitchquotes: Every game is equally pointless. You can't put this *** on a resume or anything, so what does it matter if you play online chess or LoL? Unless you're a professional and making mad cash off the game, it doesn't matter what you play.
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

Failed as a pepperino pizza

twitchquotes: Mʏ ʙᴏʏ, Kʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪɴᴏ ᴅɪᴅᴅʟᴇʀɪɴᴏ, ᴡʜʏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ɢᴏ ᴏᴜᴛ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛ ᴀɴᴅ sᴜᴄᴋ ʙʟᴏᴏᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ʀᴏᴍᴀɴɪᴀɴ ᴠᴀᴍᴘɪʀᴇ?" ᴀɴᴅ ᴀʟʟ Kʀɪᴘᴘᴇʀɪɴᴏ sᴀʏ ɪs, "Rɪᴘ ɪɴ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀᴏɴɪ" ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀᴘᴘᴀғᴀʀʀɪᴀɴ ɢᴏ, "ɪ ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜɪs ɴᴇᴡғᴀɴɢʟᴇᴅ ᴀᴍᴇʀɪᴄᴀɴ ʟᴀɴɢᴜᴀɢᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sᴘᴇᴀᴋ, ɪ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ғᴀɪʟᴇᴅ ᴀs ᴀ ғᴀᴛʜᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀs ᴀ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀɪɴᴏ ᴘɪᴢᴢᴀ
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

You used ect instead of etc

Hello! You have made the mistake of writing "ect" instead of "etc." "Ect" is a common misspelling of "etc," an abbreviated form of the Latin phrase "et cetera." Other abbreviated forms are etc., &c., &c, and et cet. The Latin translates as "et" to "and" + "cetera" to "the rest;" a literal translation to "and the rest" is the easiest way to remember how to use the phrase.
May 2022

I Am Very Smart

Kripp and his tiny peckerwood

twitchquotes: Omg Kripp... I remember seeing you in the hallways during school. I remember seeing your zipper down and I kept eyeing you tiny peckerwood. You always had the cutest grin. Please call me (205-069-1337) and find me. I will always love you. ~Eddy Pepperino (not wearing any panties atm).
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

Leifman is abusing his authority as mod again

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, it has come to my attention that one of your mods "Leifman" has been abusing his authority as mod and banning people for no good reason. I would appreciate if you took some time out of your schedule to take action and remove his mod status. Thank you!
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

Hurr Durr Durr Pizza

twitchquotes: ᕕOpieOPᕗ Hello Kripp, Cybrix here. Just wanted to say: ♩♬~♪ HURR DURR PIZZA ♩♬~♪ . ♩♬~♪ HURR DURR PIZZA ♩♬~♪ . ♩♬~♪ HURR DURR PIZZA ♩♬~♪ . ♩♬~♪ HURR DURR PIZZA ♩♬~♪ . ♩♬~♪HURR DURR PIZZA ♩♬~♪ . ♩♬~♪ HURR DURR PIZZA ᕕOpieOPᕗ
twitch chat
June 2014
Kripp

At least you have a life

twitchquotes: (◕‿◕✿) Kripp, you may suck at Hearthstone but at least you have a girlfriend. I bet these people beating you have no life (◕‿◕✿)
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

One ring to rule them all

twitchquotes: It began with the forging of the great rings. 3 for the ARPG gamers, immortals, for they cannot afford to die. 7 for the Strategy gamers, builders, who command entire armies. 9 for the MMO players, who spent days logged in without breaks, and who above all else desire loot. For within these rings was the strength and power to remain nolife. But they were all deceived. For another ring was made. In the land of Romania, in gypsy flames, the dark lord Kripp forged a secret ring, and into this ring he poured his trips, his want for a female, his family, but above all else, his desire to be casual. One ring to rule them all.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Kripp drained Greece's entire supply of Oranges

twitchquotes: Kripp, its Stavros the Fruit Seller from the bazaar. I'm sorry to tell you but you've drained Greece's entire supply of Oranges. Because of the rioting on the streets we advise you to hide any OJ supply you might have left. We can now only sell you Olive Juice and the odd jar of Tzatziki. Please no gyro ouzo
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Kripp if you don't play a lonely island song next...

twitchquotes: Kripp, if you don't play a lonely island song in the next 5 minutes i will go to your house, pet your cat, eat your pizza, drink your oj, spill your salt and copy your pasta, plz no copy pasterino lonerino islanderino
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

#1 'Cutest Teenage Streamer' from Casual Gaming Monthly

twitchquotes: Congratulations Kripp! You have been voted #1 'Cutest Teenage Streamer' by the readers of Casual Gaming Monthly! Your ability to still look adorable while losing game after game in Hearthstone is truly something special!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Too salty for table salt

twitchquotes: Kripp, when you have dinner with Reynad, do you even need table salt?
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

I tried to go help

Damn saw this one guy getting beat up by 2 other dudes today so I tried to go help, didn’t stand a chance against the 3 of us.
March 2021

He fills my butt with his Blood Thirster

twitchquotes: I sᴘʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴍʏ ʙᴜᴛᴛᴄʜᴇᴇᴋs ғᴏʀ QT. Hᴇ ᴘᴇɴᴇᴛʀᴀᴛᴇs ᴍᴇ. I ᴄᴀɴ ғᴇᴇʟ ᴍʏ ʙᴜᴛᴛ ᴛᴇᴀʀɪɴɢ ᴀs ᴍʏ ᴇʏᴇs sᴛᴀʀᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴡᴀᴛᴇʀ. I ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ʜɪᴍ. Hᴇ ʀᴏᴀʀs ᴀ ᴍɪɢʜᴛʏ ʀᴏᴀʀ ᴀs ʜᴇ ғɪʟʟʟs ᴍʏ ʙᴜᴛᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʜɪs Bʟᴏᴏᴅ Tʜɪʀsᴛᴇʀ.
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Be the better man and stop the spam

twitchquotes: I don't understand all these spammer hooligans. Its as if the pinnacle of human innovation has resulted in the creation of these inbred spammers with nothing better to do in their life other than copy and paste what the person above them wrote. Whats worse is the people using scripts to spam. Be the better man and stop the spam. Thanks.
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

We can't blame market

To be fair "but I poop from there" wasn't an explicit "no". We can't blame market for doing what it did.
March 2021

WallStreetBets

Parrot is just of new cat

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ʏᴏᴜʀ ʙᴇsᴛ ғʀɪᴇɴᴅ ᴘᴀʀʀᴏᴛ. ɪ sᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɴᴇᴡ ғʀɪᴇɴᴅ ᴄᴀᴛ, ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ᴍʏ ʙᴇᴀᴋ ᴀᴄʜᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ғᴇᴀᴛʜᴇʀ sʜɪᴠᴇʀ. ɪ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ʀᴀɴɪᴀ sᴇxʏ ʙᴇᴅ sᴏᴜɴᴅ ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʜᴏᴍᴇ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ɴᴏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғʟᴀᴘᴘᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғᴇᴀᴛʜᴇʀɪɴᴏ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

It's not TOP totem, it's BOTTOM totem

twitchquotes: Kripp... In the cultures that use a totempole it's the ones on the bottom that have the most respect and are generally elders/seers. The top of the pole are the scrublords that barely deserve the recognition. So top totem is INCORRECT. It's BOTTOM totem.
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

Kripp, this is your psychiatrist

twitchquotes: ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘsʏᴄʜɪᴀᴛʀɪsᴛ. ɪ'ᴅ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ sᴇᴛ ᴜᴘ ᴀɴᴏᴛʜᴇʀ sᴇssɪᴏɴ ᴡʜᴇʀᴇ ᴡᴇ ᴇʟᴀʙᴏʀᴀᴛᴇ ᴜᴘᴏɴ ʟᴀsᴛ ᴛɪᴍᴇ, ʏᴏᴜ sᴀɪᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ғᴇᴇʟɪɴɢ ᴅᴇᴘʀᴇssᴇᴅ ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ 40 ʏᴇᴀʀ ᴏʟᴅ ᴍɪᴅᴅʟᴇ ᴀɢᴇ ᴍᴀɴ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴡᴇɴᴛɪᴇs, ᴀɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴇxᴘʟᴏsɪᴠᴇ ʙʀᴇᴀᴋᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɢɪʀʟғʀɪᴇɴᴅ, ʜᴀғᴜ. sᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sᴏᴏɴ ᴏᴄᴛᴀᴠɪᴀɴ.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing