As I approached the Kripp with my bulging juiced up biceps
twitchquotes:As I approached the Kripp with my bulging juiced up biceps, I heard a snicker. "Soda is healthier than milk, dude" says the Kripp. With one look at him I can already tell the only thing he lifts is card packs. Just as I'm about to punch him, he top decks Big Game Hunter and I am shot dead. "Who's juiced now?" smirks the Kripp.
As I approached the Kripp with my bulging juiced up biceps, I heard a snicker. "Soda is healthier than milk, dude" says the Kripp. With one look at him I can already tell the only thing he lifts is card packs. Just as I'm about to punch him, he top decks Big Game Hunter and I am shot dead. "Who's juiced now?" smirks the Kripp.
It seems you tathered Frump
twitchquotes:Finally, the Kripp thinks, he will be a Papparrian. "I will raise it perfectly, there'll be nothing he can't do it. What a gift!" But doctor says he has bad news. Kripp is scared. He follows. Rania is holding something covered in blankets and crying. Kripp removes the blanket and looks. Trump smirks, "It seems you tathered Frump."
Finally, the Kripp thinks, he will be a Papparrian. "I will raise it perfectly, there'll be nothing he can't do it. What a gift!" But doctor says he has bad news. Kripp is scared. He follows. Rania is holding something covered in blankets and crying. Kripp removes the blanket and looks. Trump smirks, "It seems you tathered Frump."
Trying to study the psyche of Twitch Chat
twitchquotes:I Stayed up for months, trying to study the psyche of twitch chat, i reached insanity and couldnt come up with anything, but along the road i stumbled upon a far greater discovery, i found out that indeed, Kripp, IS Never Lucky
I Stayed up for months, trying to study the psyche of twitch chat, i reached insanity and couldnt come up with anything, but along the road i stumbled upon a far greater discovery, i found out that indeed, Kripp, IS BabyRage Never Lucky BabyRage
I sexually Identify as McCree
twitchquotes:I sexually Identify as McCree. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of walking slowly on the battlefield announcing it's mid day. People say that being a McCree is Impossible but I donโt care, Iโm beautiful. Iโm having a plastic surgeon install a cowboyhat, revolver and High Noon memes on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Jesse McCree" and respect my right to announce it's mid day. If you canโt accept me youโre a HighNoonaphope and need to check your gunslinger privileges.
I sexually Identify as McCree. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of walking slowly on the battlefield announcing it's mid day. People say that being a McCree is Impossible but I donโt care, Iโm beautiful. Iโm having a plastic surgeon install a cowboyhat, revolver and High Noon memes on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Jesse McCree" and respect my right to announce it's mid day. If you canโt accept me youโre a HighNoonaphope and need to check your gunslinger privileges.
The LoL player couldn't deny
twitchquotes:A Dota player and a LoL player walks into a bar. The Dota gamer turns around to the LoL gamer saying, "LoL sucks!" The LoL player couldn't deny.
A Dota player and a LoL player walks into a bar. The Dota gamer turns around to the LoL gamer saying, "LoL sucks!" The LoL player couldn't deny. BrokeBack
Just dropped down to say, I forgor
โฌโฌโฌโฌโฌ.โ.โฌโฌโฌโฌโฌ
โโโโโโโ
โขโคโโโโโโโโโโโโโ โขโค
โโ โ โโ โโโโโโโโโโ โฌ
โฅ โโโโโ โค
โโโฉโโโฉโ
โฌโโฌ
โฌโโฌ just dropped down to say
โฌโโฌ
โฌโโฌ I forgor
โฌโโฌ
๐/ โฌโโฌ
/โ โฌโโฌ
/ \
โฌโฌโฌโฌโฌ.โ.โฌโฌโฌโฌโฌ
โโโโโโโ
โขโคโโโโโโโโโโโโโ โขโค
โโ โ โโ โโโโโโโโโโ โฌ
โฅ โโโโโ โค
โโโฉโโโฉโ
โฌโโฌ
โฌโโฌ just dropped down to say
โฌโโฌ
โฌโโฌ I forgor
โฌโโฌ
๐/ โฌโโฌ
/โ โฌโโฌ
/ \
Captain Cucumber of the Vegan Police
twitchquotes: ๐ข ATTENTION, OCTAVIAN MOROSAN! This is Captain Cucumber of the Vegan Police! You have been accused of violating the Supreme Vegan Charter by drafting beast cards in your arena decks and forcing them to fight for you! This is a blatant act of animal exploitation and is punishable by death! Surrender peacefully and we will make it a quick and painless one! This is your only warning!
DatSheffy ๐ข ATTENTION, OCTAVIAN MOROSAN! This is Captain Cucumber of the Vegan Police! You have been accused of violating the Supreme Vegan Charter by drafting beast cards in your arena decks and forcing them to fight for you! This is a blatant act of animal exploitation and is punishable by death! Surrender peacefully and we will make it a quick and painless one! This is your only warning!
When Kripp is eat I pretend he is eat me
twitchquotes:When Kripp is eat I pretend he is eat me. I go down Kripp wet Kripp throat and am in warm Kripp stomach. Then I go deeper into the Kripp. I am made into Kripp gold. The Kripp sits on toilet and frees me. I am sad I am no longer Kripp food. Then Kripp eats me again.
When Kripp is eat I pretend he is eat me. I go down Kripp wet Kripp throat and am in warm Kripp stomach. Then I go deeper into the Kripp. I am made into Kripp gold. The Kripp sits on toilet and frees me. I am sad I am no longer Kripp food. Then Kripp eats me again.
What could possibly be that washed up?
twitchquotes:Hey QT, my family just got back from Hawaii. We noticed this obese life form washed up on shore. We walked over to see what could possibly be that washed up. My brother poked it with a stick and it twitched and said "wow that actually fuckin killed me" wonder what it could be?
Hey QT, my family just got back from Hawaii. We noticed this obese life form washed up on shore. We walked over to see what could possibly be that washed up. My brother poked it with a stick and it twitched and said "wow that actually fuckin killed me" wonder what it could be?
twitchquotes:I came ๐ I saw ๐ I came ๐ I saw ๐ I praise ๐ the Lord ๐ then break ๐ฅ the law ๐ฉโโ๏ธ I take ๐๏ธ what's mine ๐โโ๏ธ then take ๐๏ธ some more ๐ It rains ๐ง๏ธ it pours โ it rains ๐ง๏ธ it pours โ
I came ๐ I saw ๐ I came ๐ I saw ๐ I praise ๐ the Lord ๐ then break ๐ฅ the law ๐ฉโโ๏ธ I take ๐๏ธ what's mine ๐โโ๏ธ then take ๐๏ธ some more ๐ It rains ๐ง๏ธ it pours โ it rains ๐ง๏ธ it pours โ
Hey Kripp, this is Martin, your highschool best friend. Recently, the words of ''Octavian Morosan streams a kids card game for a living" came through my ears. Its incredible how the time has passed. I remember the good old days when we used to run naked in my house, watching erotic channels at 12 a.m. and comparing each other's dick. I hope that your choise of stay in the closet is good enough to make you happy. Truly yours, Martin.
grrrr jappan ๐ฏ๐ต is best country in teh world (sekai) !!!!๐คฌ๐ก!!!๐น๐คฌ!!!!! west bAd grrrgghhhg japenis cultureโฉ๐๐ better than amrican๐ฝ๐๐!!! (>~<) vendor machine eveywhere ๐ผand sakura trees are so ๐ธ a e s t h e t i c ๐ธ UwU if u hate it then your NOT a man of culture so shinฤ!!! ~hmph baka -_- ๐ฎ
grrrr jappan ๐ฏ๐ต is best country in teh world (sekai) !!!!๐คฌ๐ก!!!๐น๐คฌ!!!!! west bAd grrrgghhhg japenis cultureโฉ๐๐ better than amrican๐ฝ๐๐!!! (>~<) vendor machine eveywhere ๐ผand sakura trees are so ๐ธ a e s t h e t i c ๐ธ UwU if u hate it then your NOT a man of culture so shinฤ!!! ~hmph baka -_- ๐ฎ
when were you when john lenin dies
twitchquotes:apology for poor english. when were you when john lenin dies? i was sat at home eating smegma butter when pjotr ring. โjohn is killโ โnoโ
apology for poor english. when were you when john lenin dies? i was sat at home eating smegma butter when pjotr ring. โjohn is killโ โnoโ
Hasanabi what a liar
twitchquotes:What a fucking liar, dude. What a fucking, weaselly little, liar, dude. What a fucking, weaselly little LIAR, dude. Holy shit, dude. Holy fucking shit, dude. Literally lying, STILL LYING... What a fucking liar, dude. What a fucking, weaselly little, liar, dude. What a fucking, weaselly little LIAR, dude. Holy shit, dude. Holy fucking shit, dude. Literally lying, STILL LYING...
What a fucking liar, dude. What a fucking, weaselly little, liar, dude. What a fucking, weaselly little LIAR, dude. Holy shit, dude. Holy fucking shit, dude. Literally lying, STILL LYING... What a fucking liar, dude. What a fucking, weaselly little, liar, dude. What a fucking, weaselly little LIAR, dude. Holy shit, dude. Holy fucking shit, dude. Literally lying, STILL LYING...
Bring on the PLEBOLUTION
twitchquotes:Dear subs, I may be a pleb but I am a human being. Please stop taking out your BDSM fantasies of caging us to satisfy your sexual frustration. Bring on the PLEBOLUTION แ(ุจ_ุจ)แ
Dear subs, I may be a pleb but I am a human being. Please stop taking out your BDSM fantasies of caging us to satisfy your sexual frustration. Bring on the PLEBOLUTION แ(ุจ_ุจ)แ
The red bean character is very suspicious
Ok, so I was playing the hit game Among Us the other day, and when the game started, a red bean-shaped character that appeared to be wearing a spacesuit told me "shh," while having his index finger in front of where his mouth should be. I believe this act made this red bean character extremely suspicious. To understand why this red bean character is suspicious, we first must understand how the game โAmong Usโ works. The game consists of 10 bean-shaped characters, called crewmates, that are given tasks for them to complete. As these characters do their tasks, they may witness abnormal things that are not supposed to happen, such as the lights turning off on their own, sudden reactor meltdown and other crewmates dying. These acts show that there is an imposter among the crewmates that is sabotaging and is trying to kill everyone. Now why is this important to determine why the red bean is suspicious? Well now we know how the game works, now we must analyze the red beanโs actions. At the beginning of the game, the red bean tells us โshhโ while having his index finger in front of where his mouth should be. This action suggests that the red bean wants us to be quiet, or keep our mouths shut. Now why would the red bean want us to do this? This could be because the red bean wants to limit our communication in order to prevent us from spreading information. What information does the red bean want to prevent from spreading? We can assume that the reason why the red bean wants to prevent us from spreading information, is because he is actually the imposter, and he is planning on committing the crimes mentioned earlier. He does not want others to find out about actions he will cause, therefore he does not want us to communicate with each other. This concludes the reason for why I believe the red bean from the hit game Among Us is suspicious. So if you happen to see a red bean-shaped character wearing a spacesuit, please be careful.
Ok, so I was playing the hit game Among Us the other day, and when the game started, a red bean-shaped character that appeared to be wearing a spacesuit told me "shh," while having his index finger in front of where his mouth should be. I believe this act made this red bean character extremely suspicious. To understand why this red bean character is suspicious, we first must understand how the game โAmong Usโ works. The game consists of 10 bean-shaped characters, called crewmates, that are given tasks for them to complete. As these characters do their tasks, they may witness abnormal things that are not supposed to happen, such as the lights turning off on their own, sudden reactor meltdown and other crewmates dying. These acts show that there is an imposter among the crewmates that is sabotaging and is trying to kill everyone. Now why is this important to determine why the red bean is suspicious? Well now we know how the game works, now we must analyze the red beanโs actions. At the beginning of the game, the red bean tells us โshhโ while having his index finger in front of where his mouth should be. This action suggests that the red bean wants us to be quiet, or keep our mouths shut. Now why would the red bean want us to do this? This could be because the red bean wants to limit our communication in order to prevent us from spreading information. What information does the red bean want to prevent from spreading? We can assume that the reason why the red bean wants to prevent us from spreading information, is because he is actually the imposter, and he is planning on committing the crimes mentioned earlier. He does not want others to find out about actions he will cause, therefore he does not want us to communicate with each other. This concludes the reason for why I believe the red bean from the hit game Among Us is suspicious. So if you happen to see a red bean-shaped character wearing a spacesuit, please be careful.
I hate JoJo
I fucking hate JoJo. Every subreddit I go through has a vermin-like underclass of JoJo fanboys. They all just have to say โiS THat A JOJo ReFErEncE??!!!1โ on every fucking post that contains a single word that may have been used in the shitty comics. Oh, a suspicious link? Probably a rickroll. NOPE!!! Theyโve ruined that, too! One of the oldest goddamn internet traditions shat on and ruined by JoJo fanboys. Thunder Cross Split Attack! So fucking funny, right? Iโm wheezing! NO. SHUT THE FUCK UP. Nobody cares about your shitty comic series. Dio is a stupid character from a stupid comic series. I downvote every post and comment that mentions JoJo, out of pure bloodcurdling rage. I want to detonate a MASSIVE thermonuclear warhead right on top of whatever godforsaken studio publishes that stinking-pile-of-trash comic. Frankly, I donโt even care for the civilian casualties, either. At least they died for a good reason. Unlike JoJo fans, I actually contribute to the betterment of mankind, instead of spamming shitty references on the internet. Every JoJo fan that dies a slow, painful death is a win in my book. I have claimed over a dozen of them already, too. I annihilated their skulls with my fists. Their stupid ice attack didnโt do shit for them either. They dies like they lived, pathetic excuses for humans. I hope more people hear my message and declare war on JoJo. If nobody helps me, I will do as much damage as I possibly can before I die. Thank you.
I fucking hate JoJo. Every subreddit I go through has a vermin-like underclass of JoJo fanboys. They all just have to say โiS THat A JOJo ReFErEncE??!!!1โ on every fucking post that contains a single word that may have been used in the shitty comics. Oh, a suspicious link? Probably a rickroll. NOPE!!! Theyโve ruined that, too! One of the oldest goddamn internet traditions shat on and ruined by JoJo fanboys. Thunder Cross Split Attack! So fucking funny, right? Iโm wheezing! NO. SHUT THE FUCK UP. Nobody cares about your shitty comic series. Dio is a stupid character from a stupid comic series. I downvote every post and comment that mentions JoJo, out of pure bloodcurdling rage. I want to detonate a MASSIVE thermonuclear warhead right on top of whatever godforsaken studio publishes that stinking-pile-of-trash comic. Frankly, I donโt even care for the civilian casualties, either. At least they died for a good reason. Unlike JoJo fans, I actually contribute to the betterment of mankind, instead of spamming shitty references on the internet. Every JoJo fan that dies a slow, painful death is a win in my book. I have claimed over a dozen of them already, too. I annihilated their skulls with my fists. Their stupid ice attack didnโt do shit for them either. They dies like they lived, pathetic excuses for humans. I hope more people hear my message and declare war on JoJo. If nobody helps me, I will do as much damage as I possibly can before I die. Thank you.
I can't fucking believe this. Pink from 'Among Us' ruined my marriage.
I can't fucking believe this. Pink from 'Among Us' ruined my marriage.
A couple months ago, my wife said she was going out for a ladies' night. She asked me to take care of my son, so I immediately obliged. "Yes Ma'am," I told her. After a while of waiting, she finally left and I could play my favourite game, Among Us. I hopped on my laptop, booted it up and my desktop loaded, complete with the 'Red Sus' background and all my Among Us Impostor fan-art. I was shaking in excitement. I slowly dragged my finger across the track pad, and watched the cursor as it glided over to the Among Us icon. Among Us. My absolute favourite game of all time and quite possibly the best and most well-made game in the entire world. As I clicked the button my body twitched with joy at the thought of being the impostor again. My fingers drummed impatiently on my desk as the Innersloth logo faded in, and then out. Then the main title appeared. I immediately looked at pink as she slowly floated across the screen. Oh, how I wish I could feel those luscious, soft asscheeks. Pink is my queen. The real woman in my life. My wife could never be as sexy as Pink is; her soft footfalls in electrical as I peek at her curvy form from inside a vent, waiting for the right time to strike. I could never get close to Pink, however, as if she had some kind of sixth sense, she would always leave before I could reveal myself to her as the impostor. I press Practice, to warm up my fingers before my first intense game of Among Us. I hit Blue in Comms, then cross the hall and vent to Specimen, murdering Green in cold blood. The thrill of killing an animated character in an online game has never been such a rush. I then move towards Reactor, stabbing Yellow in the back and then running down the corridor to the right to access Decontamination. I move quietly through the halls, like a snake about to strike its prey, and I see- Oh no. It's Pink. Standing there motionlessly as I face her directly. Her visor shows no emotion. But she knows. I can feel it in the air. I can't kill her. She is too beautiful, too angelic, the light reflecting off of her pink bodysuit, like stars on a voided sky. She doesn't run. I am moved to tears as I caress the screen, kissing it tenderly. "Goodbye, Pink. See you soon. It will all be okay," I whisper in a soft, reassuring voice. Then as my cursor hovers over the kill button, I hesitate. Thoughts of love go through my head. Red having reddish-pink sus children with Pink. But I have to. As the impostor, it is my duty to kill. I press the 'Kill' button and watch as my character beheads Pink silently. All I hear is the spurt of blood. There is no rush. There is only Red, standing by himself in Fuel. Pink's lifeless body laying on the floor beside him. I feel nothing at first, then immense sadness, like I'm at a loved one's funeral. My son knocks on the door, interrupting my brief moment of mourning. He asks, "Dad? Are you going to make me a snack?" I tell him to shut up, and my voice cracks. I break down sobbing. I killed her. I killed my one true love. God, forgive me. I open the door to my son, and he has a confused look on his face. I say nothing, and walk to the kitchen to make him a sandwich. Tears roll off my face into the bread as I lay it onto the counter. Lettuce, cheese and meat, followed by a sad swirl of mustard on top. My son is quiet. He sits on the couch, and stares at the floor. There is a depressing air around us. I serve him the sandwich and walk back to my room, contemplating life. If I killed Pink, how am I to be trusted around my family? I cry for hours, and finally my wife comes back. She sees me bawling on the bed like a child who dropped his ice cream. She then asks me why I'm crying and mutter, "I killed her. I killed my only love, Pink, in Among Us." She is filled with rage and slaps me across my face. I feel numb. She asks for a divorce. I don't reply. Instead, I take my laptop and get into my car, driving to a nearby hotel. Fast forward a few months to the divorce. It was quick and painless. After court, I ask my former wife to take me back.
"I can't take you back. You've always been this way. I was sus of you from the start."
Edit: Found this on steam, in the Among Us reviews section.
I can't fucking believe this. Pink from 'Among Us' ruined my marriage.
A couple months ago, my wife said she was going out for a ladies' night. She asked me to take care of my son, so I immediately obliged. "Yes Ma'am," I told her. After a while of waiting, she finally left and I could play my favourite game, Among Us. I hopped on my laptop, booted it up and my desktop loaded, complete with the 'Red Sus' background and all my Among Us Impostor fan-art. I was shaking in excitement. I slowly dragged my finger across the track pad, and watched the cursor as it glided over to the Among Us icon. Among Us. My absolute favourite game of all time and quite possibly the best and most well-made game in the entire world. As I clicked the button my body twitched with joy at the thought of being the impostor again. My fingers drummed impatiently on my desk as the Innersloth logo faded in, and then out. Then the main title appeared. I immediately looked at pink as she slowly floated across the screen. Oh, how I wish I could feel those luscious, soft asscheeks. Pink is my queen. The real woman in my life. My wife could never be as sexy as Pink is; her soft footfalls in electrical as I peek at her curvy form from inside a vent, waiting for the right time to strike. I could never get close to Pink, however, as if she had some kind of sixth sense, she would always leave before I could reveal myself to her as the impostor. I press Practice, to warm up my fingers before my first intense game of Among Us. I hit Blue in Comms, then cross the hall and vent to Specimen, murdering Green in cold blood. The thrill of killing an animated character in an online game has never been such a rush. I then move towards Reactor, stabbing Yellow in the back and then running down the corridor to the right to access Decontamination. I move quietly through the halls, like a snake about to strike its prey, and I see- Oh no. It's Pink. Standing there motionlessly as I face her directly. Her visor shows no emotion. But she knows. I can feel it in the air. I can't kill her. She is too beautiful, too angelic, the light reflecting off of her pink bodysuit, like stars on a voided sky. She doesn't run. I am moved to tears as I caress the screen, kissing it tenderly. "Goodbye, Pink. See you soon. It will all be okay," I whisper in a soft, reassuring voice. Then as my cursor hovers over the kill button, I hesitate. Thoughts of love go through my head. Red having reddish-pink sus children with Pink. But I have to. As the impostor, it is my duty to kill. I press the 'Kill' button and watch as my character beheads Pink silently. All I hear is the spurt of blood. There is no rush. There is only Red, standing by himself in Fuel. Pink's lifeless body laying on the floor beside him. I feel nothing at first, then immense sadness, like I'm at a loved one's funeral. My son knocks on the door, interrupting my brief moment of mourning. He asks, "Dad? Are you going to make me a snack?" I tell him to shut up, and my voice cracks. I break down sobbing. I killed her. I killed my one true love. God, forgive me. I open the door to my son, and he has a confused look on his face. I say nothing, and walk to the kitchen to make him a sandwich. Tears roll off my face into the bread as I lay it onto the counter. Lettuce, cheese and meat, followed by a sad swirl of mustard on top. My son is quiet. He sits on the couch, and stares at the floor. There is a depressing air around us. I serve him the sandwich and walk back to my room, contemplating life. If I killed Pink, how am I to be trusted around my family? I cry for hours, and finally my wife comes back. She sees me bawling on the bed like a child who dropped his ice cream. She then asks me why I'm crying and mutter, "I killed her. I killed my only love, Pink, in Among Us." She is filled with rage and slaps me across my face. I feel numb. She asks for a divorce. I don't reply. Instead, I take my laptop and get into my car, driving to a nearby hotel. Fast forward a few months to the divorce. It was quick and painless. After court, I ask my former wife to take me back.
"I can't take you back. You've always been this way. I was sus of you from the start."
Edit: Found this on steam, in the Among Us reviews section.