What happened to this ad? :(
Sort by:

That hunk of a man, Blank

twitchquotes: That hunk of a man, Blank, is an E-sports athlete? Unbelievable. He could be a freakin model. Or a pro footballer with a ripped physique like that. That is by far the hottest sportsman to ever grace the esports industry. I'd let him blunk me any day.
twitch chat
July 2018
LCK

League of Legends

RIP Joe the Spider

I know this is really stupid but Iโ€™m sad about it. Yesterday I had a friend come over. Iโ€™m a girl who lives alone so I guess some โ€œdudeโ€ stuff hasnโ€™t been done around the house. Context: I have a spider named joe. Heโ€™s a dandy long leg. Heโ€™s been my friend in the bathroom for months and had recently made his way down to closer by me by the tub instead of on the ceiling. I like to think I gained his trust. Well my friend goes into the bathroom and comes out said โ€œyouโ€™re welcomeโ€. Iโ€™m super confused. So I ask โ€œfor what?โ€ He says โ€œI just killed a big ass spider for youโ€. I couldnโ€™t even contain myself. I just yelled โ€œYOU KILLED JOE?!โ€ And started tearing up. I didnโ€™t tell him to leave Joe alone it never occurred to me. JOE TRUSTED ME. Joe had been in my bathroom since he was super tiny and he grew to be such a big boy. My friend was distraught. Heโ€™s a Pisces, so he immediately felt my deep sorrow for Joe. He apologized and swore to never squish any more spiders at my house. I think Joe was biologically female because there is a baby Joe. Baby Joe is on my ceiling but idk if I can gain Baby Joeโ€™s trust after they witnessed the murder of their parental figure. RIP Joe I miss you so much. Getting ready in the morning will never be the same.
May 2022
I used to be a real ad

No one else plays healer, only me

twitchquotes: i am a mercy player, and you should be THANKFUL i managed to bless your game. no one else plays healer, only me, and you DARE complain about the way I play? this entire community is TOXIC and ruins the competitive experience for us mercy players
twitch chat
June 2017

Overwatch

day in the life of a cs pro

day in the life of a cs pro: 1. wake up 6am 2. finish tournament at midnight 3. brush teeth and eat breakfast 4. Sleep while 1==1: loop()
May 2021

CSGO

You have been presented with superior intellect

twitchquotes: โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€” TwitchVotes You have been presented with superior intellect. Type 5Head to activateโ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”
twitch chat
March 2019
I used to be a real ad

This is our town SCRUB

twitchquotes: (เธ‡ อ ยฐ อŸส– อกยฐ)เธ‡ This is our town SCRUB (เธ‡ อ ยฐ อŸส– อกยฐ)เธ‡(เธ‡ โ€ขฬ€_โ€ขฬ)เธ‡ Yeah beat it! (เธ‡ โ€ขฬ€_โ€ขฬ)เธ‡
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

I awoke from my coma and muted the stream

twitchquotes: I owe my life to [insert streamer]. I got in a horrible car crash and i was in 6 month coma. The nurse walked in and changed the Twitch channel to [insert streamer]'s stream. I awoke from my coma and muted [insert streamer].
twitch chat
September 2014

Classic

Look what Casualstone has done to you Kripp

twitchquotes: @nl_Kripp I just rewatched your Diablo Intro video and shed a tear. At that time you were full of joy, passion and energy. Now look at yourself after all this years. Look what Casualstone has done to you. You are dying from boredom Kripp, you are yawning so hard as if you didn't sleep for ages, and tons of salt make your existance even more pathetic. Don't you realise it's time to make a step towards changes?
twitch chat
February 2017
Kripp

OH MY GOD IS THAT A RAINBOW LOGO?

โ€ผ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธOH MY GODโ€ผ๏ธโ€ผ๏ธ IS THAT A ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆR๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆA๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆI๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆN๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆB๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆO๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆW๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ LOGO?!?!?!?!? ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜ OMG ๐Ÿคฏ๐ŸคฏUR SO INCLUSIVE๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆLGBT ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธTRANS ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธRIGHTS YAAAAS!!!!!!!!!๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ UR SO PROGRESSIVE ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿผโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿฝโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿพโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿฟโ€โ™‚๏ธ I WILL NOW BUY EVERYTHING YOU HAVE! ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿฅบ๐Ÿฅบ I LOVE YOU SO MUCH NOW ๐Ÿ˜ซ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿฅฐ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€โšง๏ธ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ
June 2021

Emoji Pasta

Forsen banned

twitchquotes: Twitch streamer Forsen was banned on May 8th for a misleading stream title "ranking up" when playing Valorant. Twitch strictly forbids false advertisement from streamers on its platform. It's unclear when Forsen will be unbanned but no one watches a washed up streamer anyways.
twitch chat
May 2020
Forsen
I used to be a real ad

what is the point of spamming in chat?

twitchquotes: what is the point of spamming in chat?? all you do is send some pixels to some other guy in his 30's who is pretending to be an idiot... wow what an accomplishment ๓ €€
twitch chat
January 2022

I hate Twitch Chat

Florida Mayhem McDonald's

twitchquotes: Guys, the color scheme of McDonald's consists of red, yellow, and white. It does not include blac k like Florida Mayhem. Stop spamming about how they are McDonald's already. It's untrue and unfunny.
twitch chat
March 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

Hearthstone vs MTG Online

twitchquotes: Tbh, this game is too boring for anyone to understand. Hearthstone is already boring enough to the extant that pretty much no one can sit through it unless youre at a professional level. This is just to unfathomably boring. I know this is an indie game, but seriously if anyone think that this garbage can compete with an older game like HS, youre mistaken.
twitch chat
March 2018

Hearthstone

What is so funny about copypasta?

What is so funny about copypasta? Someone put a lot of time in writing out a wall of text, and all you do is just copy and paste it? Unbelievable. Freaking unbelievable. It is so fucking disrespectful for the original writter to have his thoughts repeated over and over just for some kind of sick joke. You fools know the navy seal copypasta, right? People chuckle at it because he was "very mad". Well, think about it, motherfucker. What if he WAS very mad? What if he actually had feelings and his day was ruined? Ever think about it like that? No, of course not. You tools just took his words over and over and used it for shits and giggles. How fucking rude. At this point, my 3 page essay on why I think cancel culture is cancer could be used as a copypasta. That is just fucking wrong on so many levels. I'm not going to write out a copypasta myself, because I don't want my words to be shat out over and over again. I'm just expressing my thoughts and feelings on the abuse of copypasta. It just needs to fucking stop
January 2020

NFT Navy Seal Copypasta

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little pirate? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class at Full Sail University, and I've been involved in numerous secret Photoshop files, and I have over 300 confirmed NFTs. I am trained in gorilla artwork and I'm the top artist in the entire US armed artists. You are nothing to me but just another pirate. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of discord servers across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can turn you into an NFT in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed brushstrokes, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States NFT Corps and I will use it to its full extent to stomp your miserable ass directly into the blockchain, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit paint all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
December 2021

NFTs

Cryptocurrency

Navy Seal

What happened to this ad? :(

Our Salt, who art in hearthstone

twitchquotes: BlessRNG Our Salt, who art in hearthstone, hallowed be thy game, your kripparian comes, your aggro decks be done, on constructed as it is in arena. BlessRNG Give us today our daily meme deck. BlessRNG And forgive us our rng bullshit, as we also have forgiven others rng bullshit. BlessRNG And lead us not into Smorc, but deliver us from the evil aggro decks. Amen BlessRNG
twitch chat
December 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

I love Carl from Brawl Stars

Guys, Iโ€™m literally detecting seismic activity. I never wanted to rock with anyone more than I want to with Carl. That perfect, chiseled body. Those bountiful hills. The majestic mountains of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never rock with him, pass my sediment through him, and have him birth a set of perfect hot springs. I'd do fricking ANYTHING for the chance to get Carlโ€™s rocks off. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fricking bear. Why would Supercell create something so perfect? To fricking tantalize us? Fricking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fricking can't anymore. Frick.
December 2020

THROW THIS CRAB 2 MAKE HBOX MAD

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿฆ€ THROW ๐Ÿฆ€ THIS ๐Ÿฆ€ CRAB ๐Ÿฆ€ 2 ๐Ÿฆ€ MAKE ๐Ÿฆ€ HBOX ๐Ÿฆ€ MAD
twitch chat
June 2019

Rhyme Chant

Super Smash Bros

Fortnite, as a game, shows the failures of capitalism

twitchquotes: Fortnite, as a game, shows the failures of capitalism. The whole premise of buying VBucks for bling and novelty with real money creates a divide between the rich and the poor over something completely useless. The struggle to compete for weapons in game shows how people who get lucky will win - if, under a communistic style - Fortnite started with everyone sharing the same weapons, only then will the best at the game win the royale. Now you see, โ€œthe gameโ€ and โ€œFortniteโ€ can easily be replaced with โ€œworkingโ€ and โ€œsocietyโ€, and you have the description of communism. By underlining these basic errors in such a system Fortnite acts as perfect communist propoganda. Workers of the world, unite!
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite

Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Roe v. Wade Emoji Pasta

HEY ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿ˜ฉ there comrade ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐Ÿ’ชcummy! the ๐Ÿ‘น supreme ๐Ÿ† cock๐Ÿ› has ๐Ÿ—ณvoted to strike ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€โš–๏ธโŒ›๏ธdown the ๐ŸŒˆ sexy ๐Ÿคง๐Ÿคฐ๐Ÿปroe v. wade decision ๐Ÿ˜according ๐Ÿคค๐Ÿฆถ๐Ÿปto a opinion ๐Ÿ–Šwrittenโœ๏ธ๐Ÿ’ธ by daddy ๐Ÿ’…๐Ÿป๐Ÿ™ˆ sammy ๐Ÿ‘ถ๐Ÿป๐Ÿ™…๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธ aLITo. ๐Ÿท๐Ÿ’จ the opinion is a ๐Ÿ’ฆ๐ŸŒ FULL THROATED ๐Ÿ“ฒโค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ”ฅGIRTHY ๐Ÿ† contraDICKtion ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿ‘ of the 1973 ๐Ÿ‘ฟ๐Ÿ‘Ždecision that ๐Ÿ’๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ guaranteed federal ๐Ÿ˜ค cocks-titutuinal ๐Ÿ˜ณ protection ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ’„of abortion rights!!! โค๏ธโ€๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿซกeveryone who ๐Ÿณ๏ธโ€๐ŸŒˆ๐Ÿ’ฆ woke remember ๐Ÿ™‹โœŠ๐Ÿป๐Ÿค” to fund ๐Ÿ’ธ๐Ÿฅต planned parenthood and ๐ŸŒช๐Ÿ‘ผ donate to ๐Ÿง‘๐Ÿผโ€๐Ÿผ๐Ÿค‘abortion funds! get yo ๐Ÿ“ธuturuses ๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ‘ turnt you ๐Ÿ’ƒwhore! ๐ŸŒญevery whore knows ๐Ÿง ๐Ÿผthat everyone ๐Ÿ”œshould have ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€โš•๏ธ๐Ÿฅaccess to safe ๐Ÿ™ ๐ŸŒŽabortions โค๏ธ๐Ÿ˜˜ if they choose ๐Ÿ’…๐Ÿป๐Ÿ‘€ to have one. ๐Ÿ‘‘๐Ÿ‘นsend to ten ๐Ÿ˜ฌ๐Ÿ™of your closest ๐Ÿšฑ๐Ÿ…พ๏ธWHORES to secure abortion ๐Ÿ“ซ๐Ÿคrights in ameriCUM ๐Ÿคค๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธif you get five โœ‹ back abortion ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ’‹rights will be codified ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€โš–๏ธ๐Ÿคคin law ๐Ÿ“ธ๐Ÿ‘ 
May 2022

Emoji Pasta

Politics

Text-to-Speech Playing