Guys, I’m literally detecting seismic activity. I never wanted to rock with anyone more than I want to with Carl. That perfect, chiseled body. Those bountiful hills. The majestic mountains of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never rock with him, pass my sediment through him, and have him birth a set of perfect hot springs. I'd do fricking ANYTHING for the chance to get Carl’s rocks off. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fricking bear. Why would Supercell create something so perfect? To fricking tantalize us? Fricking laugh in our faces?! Honestly guys, I just fricking can't anymore. Frick.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
I sexually idenfity as VapeNation
twitchquotes:
I sexually Identify as 
. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of filling the air with the fattest rips. People say to me that a person being is Impossible and I’m *** retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install cloudchasers, coils, and a battery on my body for the perfect vape. From now on I want you guys to call me “Lit” and respect my right to rip the fattest vapes. If you can’t accept me you’re a vapiphobe and need to check your privileges
. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of filling the air with the fattest rips. People say to me that a person being is Impossible and I’m *** retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install cloudchasers, coils, and a battery on my body for the perfect vape. From now on I want you guys to call me “Lit” and respect my right to rip the fattest vapes. If you can’t accept me you’re a vapiphobe and need to check your privileges
twitch chat
VapeNation
I sexually Identify as
I cannot wait to see RED BULL BARON POWER PLAY
twitchquotes:
I cannot wait to see 
BULL BARON POWER PLAY, after they won the GRUB HUB teamfight. Maybe they can get those HONDA turrets, too! After they win the game, I can go tweet to get on their VERIZON all chat during the STATE FARM analyst desk
BULL BARON POWER PLAY, after they won the GRUB HUB teamfight. Maybe they can get those HONDA turrets, too! After they win the game, I can go tweet to get on their VERIZON all chat during the STATE FARM analyst desk
twitch chat
LCS
League of Legends
sellout
Police clearing out a homeless encampment
On my way into the office today I saw the police clearing out a homeless encampment under a bridge, forcing them into the cold and rain. I keep playing it over in my head and haven’t been able to focus on work all day because of my erection.
WallStreetBets
I found one doc that values a ring
Babbling book is quickly becoming one of my favorite cards
twitchquotes:
Babbling book is quickly becoming one of my favorite cards. It's just so positive and generous. Practically costs nothing at all at one mana you drop him on the board and that chill ass mofo gives you a spell to use later in the game. And you also get this adorable little 1/1 can ping things but usually is too harmless to be removed. But more than the BB is just so positive. It comes on the board like "do you want to cast a spell?" and I'm like "yeah BB i do want to cast a spell let's do this shit" and when he attacks he's like "SPELLS ARE FUN" and I'm like "yeah they are SO FUN." He doesn't say some bullshit macho shit like "I will destroy you" he's just like "nah spells are fun." And it looks so happy. I mean this is an inanimate object literally brought to life by magic. It understands it's life is a temporary magical gift and the dude is just fucking loving it. I mean look at his face he's just so happy. I am literally never sad when babbling book is on board. IDK if he's gonna make it into the metagame or not but for now he (or she) a pretty chill card
twitch chat