twitchquotes:
How come when batman dons a suit of armor and beats up mentally ill clowns its "Heroic" but when I do it I'm "Committing manslaughter" and I'm "Not allowed in McDonalds again"
twitch chat
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
10% of the playerbase end up doing 90% of the work
twitchquotes:
You know what I hate? The fact that we 10% of the playerbase end up doing 90% of the work due to the "leave it to night crew" attitude. I think we need further actualization on the night counter crew if you will. Have you ever heard the phrase: life is about the journey, not the destination? I want to rally people to act in such a way to benefit the good of the stream. I don't like trolling. Its self sacrificial in nature. I am like Jesus in a sense. I troll only because of your sins.
twitch chat
TwitchPlaysPokemon
Mr. Morosan's deceptive practices
twitchquotes:
Twitch Chat (āChatā) respectfully submits this memorandum of law in support of its motion to enjoin Octavian Morosan (ānl_Krippā) from distributing false and deceptive advertising for his stream. The "nl" of Mr. Morosan's streaming identity refers to "no life." This is a blatantly deceptive and demonstrably false claim as it can be qualitatively determined that Mr. Morosan does indeed have a life. The Lanham Act merits an injunction preventing Mr. Morosan's deceptive practices.
twitch chat
Kripp
Holy shit! You identify as an attack helicopter?
Holy shit! You identify as an attack helicopter? Iāve never heard that joke before, but itās so genius! You sir, or madame, or helicopter, are the absolute most hilarious and original person I have ever seen in my entire life. Move over, Jerry Seinfeld. Get lost, Brian Regan. Out of the way, Family Guy Funny Moments Compilation #53. Thereās a new funniest man in town. Holy shit, I just canāt get over this joke. Iām giggling and guffawing harder than ever before. You should win an Oscar and an Emmy and a Grammy and a Nickelodeon Kidās Choice Award. Attack helicopter gender! Wow! So funny! Take that, liberals! Haha. Every night since I was born I have looked up to the plastic glow-in-the-dark stars on my ceiling and wondered, āI hope one day I can be as funny as the attack helicopter gender guy.ā I will tell my children, and my childrenās children, all about the absolute hilarity that went down just now. You just broke the Guinness World Record for funniest and most original jokester on the planet. Iām fucking simultaneously shitting and cumming because this joke is just so funny. Holy shit. That was an amazing joke, my guy. Iām gonna make a subreddit dedicated entirely to this one joke. Itās gonna get thousands of members! History books will forever remember the time you said, āI identify as an attack helicopter.ā Itāll go right there in the important quote book, right between Patrick Henry and Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. I just canāt believe I was here to witness such grandeur. I was here! I think Iām going to make a whole religion based on worshipping you, my glorious and hilarious attack helicopter God. This is just so funny I canāt believe it! Hahahahahahahahahaha! I think Iām going to go to the hospital and fucking die from laughing to hard, but thatās okay! This is even funnier than that guy who said he identified as a toaster! Can you believe it? I never thought that very different joke could be topped, but here we are! Did I mention how funny and original that joke was? Ah, well done, sir, or madame, or helicopter. This is an experience I wonāt forget any time soon. Ha. Haha. Ha. Lol. Lmao. Haha. Jajaja. Lmfao. Rofl, rotfl, ha.
chat I took an iq test yesterday
twitchquotes:
chat I took an iq test yesterday and it turns out I'm a certified genius. don't let this affect your opinion of me. I'm one of you.. maybe just a little bit better and smarter and hotter. I'm still 
at heart, albeit 
in brain.
at heart, albeit in brain.
twitch chat
Response to Navy Seal Copypasta
Did you just think that you could fucking fool me with that comment of yours? I've searched your name up in the Navy SEAL database and you have never even graduated BUD/S, hell, even served in the Armed Forces. If you were actually a Navy SEAL, then you actually know how to spell guerrilla, you fucking moron. And you say you are the top sniper in the entire US Armed Forces and have over 300 confirmed kills. If that were true, then why the fuck is Chris Kyle a household name and you aren't? And plus he only had 160 kills. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. Plus why the fuck would you say you have a secret network of spies yet you just revealed that you had your secret network of spies? Are you a fucking idiot? If you can kill someone seven-hundred different ways, then list them all, I bet you can't even come up with seven. And if you had access to the entire US Marine Corps arsenal, then why the fuck did you just say you were in the Navy SEALs earlier? If only you could have done your research prior to posting your little ācleverā comment, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldnāt, you goddamn idiot.