twitchquotes:
How come when batman dons a suit of armor and beats up mentally ill clowns its "Heroic" but when I do it I'm "Committing manslaughter" and I'm "Not allowed in McDonalds again"
twitch chat
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
This guy's deck is CRAZY
twitchquotes:
This guy's deck is CRAZY!” ☑ “My deck can't win against a deck like that” ☑ "He NEEDED precisely those two cards to win" ☑ “He topdecked the only card that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect cards" ☑ “There was nothing I could do” ☑ “I played that perfectly”
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
Hearthstone
This Copypasta Is CRAZY!
Our Salt Lord who art in Canada. Kripparian be thy name
twitchquotes:
Our Salt Lord who art in Canada. Kripparian be thy name. Thy Bad RNG come. Thy topdecks be done. On Arena as it is in Ranked. Give us this day our daily rant. And forgive us our button presses as we forgive those who don't press theirs against us. For thine is the never lucky. The bullsh*t RNG. Forever and ever. Ameno.
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Navy Seal
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I'm the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You're fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You're fucking dead, kiddo.
Classic
Navy Seal
Putin
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣵⣿⣿⣿⠿⡟⣛⣧⣿⣯⣿⣝⡻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠁⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣍⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⢷⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⢼⣿⣿⣿⣿
⢹⣿⣿⢻⠎⠔⣛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣿⣿⣿⣿
⢸⣿⣿⠇⡶⠄⣿⣿⠿⠟⡛⠛⠻⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣗⢣⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠐⣿⣿⡿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣾⣶⣶⣶⣿⣁⣔⣤⣀⣼⢲⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⢟⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠄⣟⣿⣿⣿⡷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣮⣽⠛⢻⣽⣿⡇⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⡷⠻⢻⡻⣯⣝⢿⣟⣛⣛⣛⠝⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠄⠸⣿⣿⡟⣹⣦⠄⠋⠻⢿⣶⣶⣶⡾⠃⡂⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠄⠄⠟⠋⠄⢻⣿⣧⣲⡀⡀⠄⠉⠱⣠⣾⡇⠄⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⢾⣾⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⠟⠃⠄⠄⢈⣻⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿⣾⣷⡄⠄⢾⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
Let's get one thing about me "straight" up-front
twitchquotes:
Let's get one thing about me "straight" up-front. When it comes to sexuality, I'm about as hetero as they come. If a gay guy came on to me, I'd be like, "No way, bro. I'm a straight-up party boy who's into chicks." Yup, one gay dude wouldn't stand a chance. It would take at least four or five gay guys strapping me down to make it inside me. Sorry, fellas, that's just how straight I am. And even then I wouldn't make it easy. I'd be like, "Hey look! There goes George Michael!" And they'd all shriek "Where?!" at once, and I'd make a break for it, and they'd be like, "He's getting away! Chase him! I want his butt!" But I wouldn't just give them my butt. They'd have to take it. And once they got me strapped down, I'd stop fighting it because that would be giving them what they want. And I don't want them to enjoy it. If anyone's going to enjoy it, it's going to be me. So, I'd just relax into it and taunt them by telling them how ripped and sexy I find them and letting them know how much I'm enjoying myself. So, even though I'd have a bunch of ripped guys all taking turns on my butt, I'd still be enjoying it. But only because I forced myself to. It's not like I could fight these guys off. There are too many of them and they want me too much. What am I, Chuck Norris?" I'm not against homosexuality, though. I say to each his own. You're free to do whatever you want.
twitch chat