[Copypasta] Oh great! Another 2 sentence long pasta!

Oh great! Another 2 sentence long pasta! What a game changer! I'm sure the 5 measly lines of text you just posted are going to be the next big copypasta in no time! This is hilarious! Great Stuff! I can really see this being the next big thing! It's gonna be the next "Navy Seal" or "Penguin Of Doom", I can feel it! I love how short and boring it was! Extra points for being extremely forgettable with no interesting lines, a complete lack of tone, and, as I mentioned earlier, an extremely compact 30 to 40 word length! You know what you should do? You should, unprompted, post this godawful pasta in the comments of a post on a separate subreddit and when people downvote you you can post it to r/AteThePasta! Now that would be funny! Almost as funny as the pasta itself, which, may I remind you, is extremely short! God I can't believe you came up with this all on your own! Thanks so much for this! It's truly a gift! And it made me realise that no matter how hard I try I will never find a copypasta as funny as this roughly 30 word paragraph that has already been forgotten by the 47 people who upvoted it, and the 20 people who commented !thesaurizethis over and over again! And I should give up all hope of coming up with such a great pasta in my life, so I'm simply going to kill myself tonight! This is your fault! Your copypasta made me kill myself! I'm going to write your reddit username in my suicide note, as well as the entire copypasta, which I should have no trouble fitting on the page since it's so fucking short! Thanks again! 😁
May 2022
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More Copypastas

Yuumi this, Yuumi that

twitchquotes: Yuumi this, Yuumi that... For fucks sake chat you do this every time a new champion comes out. Everybody says they are too weak and need buffs. Michael is the ONLY one who goes against the grain to show you that indeed the 27% winrate is a myth and will demonstrate that perfectly clearly how it should be closer to 10%...
twitch chat
May 2019
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Imagine using a mid tier character

twitchquotes: Imagine using a mid tier character that needs tons of practice and dedication as you need to memorize every gimp and gimmick and you lose to some smash 4 downsmash down B up B shit
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

Tuck Frump

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014
Forsen

How do I get my husband to stop going β€˜Goblin Mode’ during sex?

How do I get my husband to stop going β€˜Goblin Mode’ during sex? TLDR; My husband says β€˜Goblin Mode activated’ when we start to have sex, growls and acts like a caveman, and then says β€˜Goblin Mode off’ when we stop, and then pretends not to remember afterward. I really love my husband and he’s always been great in bed. But recently he’s been acting really weird. So, a couple of days ago, my son went on a rampage through our house and said he was in β€˜Goblin Mode’. We didn’t really know what to do with him, so we sent him to live with my parents so he can go to a special needs school. My husband a really great relationship with our son and loved him more than anything. Naturally, he was upset when he had to leave. He’s an incredibly tough man, but this was the first time I’ve ever seen him cry. I think since then, he’s been a little emotionally unwell. I’ve heard him muttering, β€˜Goblin’ repeatedly when he didn’t notice me, staring blankly into his food, and just going alone by himself to do who knows what. I feel awful for him, but we both agreed that this was for the best. Last night, the day after our son went away, we decided to have sex to relieve our stress. However, my husband said β€˜Goblin Mode activated’, starting growling, and went wild having sex with me. Admittedly, it was some of the best and most experimental sex I’ve ever had, but I’m worried that something might be going on with my husband. Any advice? Edit: The problem isn’t the β€˜Goblin Mode’, it’s that he could be ill
July 2022

Confessions

Classic

Kripp.... how do I say this

twitchquotes: Kripp.... how do I say this. You aren't as good as you used to be, your quality of both decks and play have deteriorated significantly. At this point I think I'm a better player than you which makes me very sad. Your decks have no balance between curve and minion quality, tar creeper?! Really? In zoo! As much as you sell it as one, zoo is not a control deck. At least not a conventional one.
twitch chat
August 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing