twitchquotes:
fascinating, tell me more
fascinating, tell me more
twitch chat
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
There's no reason to have a Dad Bod when push ups exist
There's no reason to have a Dad Bod when push ups exist. I'm always finding time to crank out a few p-ups. Ahh yep, I do maybe a thousand p-ups a day and I'm a father of two. Those nerds coloring with crayons? Time to squeeze in a few p-ups. Little dorks eating mac and cheese? It's p-up time. I'm like a leathered marble statue of a really muscular guy, my muscles are so tight and rugged. Hell, I took a p-up break while typing this comment. The ladies at work, these little work ladies, love when I crank out p-ups right there in front of them and come up off the floor red faced and with a sizeable bulge in my slacks. That bulge is unrelated to the p-ups, by the way, I'm just a guy who's always one hard nipple poking through a shirt away from a full meat platter. Hell, I'd cheat on my wife with one of these little work ladies if she wasn't one of the little work ladies I work with. We bone in the bathroom. I get jacked on p-ups and then we bone in the bathroom and there's nothing my boss can do about it because my vascularity is way too intimidating. I tell him he should do some p-ups if he wants to fuck my wife. It's the only way she gets that slizz juiced and loosed. She wants to see multitudinous p-ups and she wants to see those p-ups now! Whoops! Haha, okay, looks like she's watching me type this over my shoulder. Uh oh. See ya later, nerdbags. I'm gonna p-ups myself up to a full plumper and pump that honey ham rump of my little work lady wife.
My name is Sergei, sorry for bad England
twitchquotes:
Hi my name ist Sergei. Sorry for bad england. I started bronzer II but from watch trick2g sterm everyday i climb to PLat 8. Everyday i walk 20 miles frozen tundra to stream leagu of legion on 1980 Dell computer processor. I left my wife and the vodka make me become alcoholic and i need stream supporter for helps. Please no copy pastaerino dongerino cappucino reno nevadarino bongerino plz.
twitch chat
Trick2g
Reynad's Lawyer
twitchquotes:
༼ຈل͜ຈ༽_•︻̷̿┻̿═━一 Greetings, I am Reynad's new lawyer, Gino Pasterino. It appears you are playing one of my client's decks, which is now under copyright at the US patent offices. Please desist immediately or be subject to monetary fines and penalties. No cappuccino.
twitch chat
Kripp
Born perfectly to explore dank memes
twitchquotes:
Born too late to explore the Earth, born too early to explore the universe, born perfectly to explore dank memes ◕ ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡◕
twitch chat
Classic
Hey Doublelift! It's me Greg from high school
twitchquotes:
Hey Doublelift! It's me Greg from high school. How's it going man? Remember that one time you jacked off Mr. Stevens to get an A in gym? Haha classic Yiliang you always did the craziest things. Nice talking to you my man.
twitch chat
Doublelift