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I want to be a box

twitchquotes: Hello My name is Juan Taquito, and My dream is to become a cardboard box, I go home to my family of 12 children daily, searching online for how to become a box, that is why i will watch BoxBox every day, to learn his ways and reach my true form.
twitch chat
July 2014
flosd

Please dont talk about melee in an ultimate chat 😡

twitchquotes: honestly melee is dead, it has been since smash 4. Please dont talk about melee in a smash ultimate chat. 😡
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

What happened to this ad? :(

Salt mines are now Greece's #1 export

twitchquotes: Hello Mr. Kripp, on behalf of the entire Greek country, I would like to thank you for single handedly restoring our economy with your endless supplies of salt. Salt mines are now Greece's #1 export. Most excellent, all hail Kripperino!
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

My donger is half my age

twitchquotes: ◕ ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡◕ ɪ ᴍ**ᴛᴜʀʙᴀᴛᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ɴɪᴠᴇᴀ ᴄʀᴇᴀᴍ ɴᴏᴡ ᴍʏ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀ ɪs ʜᴀʟғ ᴍʏ ᴀɢᴇ ͡◕ ͜ ʖ ͡ ͡◕
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

This is my son Nestor

twitchquotes: For all those wondering, this is my son Nestor. We share no blood but he is my life. He came from Cuba (legally, of course) six years ago and lives with me in Florida. I am so proud of him and raising him has been the best, most rewarding thing I’ve done in my life.
twitch chat
June 2020
I used to be a real ad

I've achieved so much that you'll never come close to

twitchquotes: I've achieved so much that you'll never come close to. Your life is fucking empty, which is why you're relishing this little bit of attention you're getting from someone. You spent an evening tweeting inane opinions and reactions into the void. Let me know when reality kicks in.
twitch chat
May 2019

Robinhood halts trading on President's Day

This is bullshit. I’m disgusted and I’m honestly on the verge of having a mental fucking breakdown. Robinhood has once again halted trading. But this time it’s halted on all stocks. This fine Monday morning I wake up to find that all orders aren’t going to be filled till tomorrow morning. My dad’s wife’s girlfriend is a powerful lawyer in Boca Raton and I’m seriously considering retaining her services and filing a class action lawsuit against these citadel dick munchers. This has happened to me too many times. I’m low key spiraling into madness. Donate to me on onlyfans if you want to contribute towards the legal fees. She’s giving me a pretty kickass discount, but she estimates it’s still going to cost $150k. This happens to be the amount I lost on gme, but this is not relevant to the conversation here. It’s time to rise up and take down robinhood once and for all. Also, yeah my stepmom has a girlfriend. It’s 2021 you bigots.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Hi Kripp, Google again here

twitchquotes: Kripp, Google again here. We've noticed that you've been away from Twitch for at least 2 minutes in the past. We're just wondering if everything is okay. Is it still the merchandise? We're serious about raising the price if it's a problem to you. We just want you to have fun, and to of course buy more Twitch merchandise. Our Viewbots are ready to bring you (mostly us) much ad revenue. Thank you Kripp, hope to see you soon
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Viewbots

I am a heron

twitchquotes: i am a heron. i haev a long neck and i pick fish out of the water w/ my beak. if you dont repost this comment on 10 other pages i will fly into your kitchen tonight and make a mess of your pots and pans
twitch chat
July 2014
Stivitybobo

666

twitchquotes: 123+123+420=666 Illuminati confirmed
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

You are such a large pepperoni, why aren't you a pizza

twitchquotes: "Kripp my son," say the Papparin, "you are such a large pepperoni, why aren't you a pizza." But the Kripp don't respond. He elopes to Greece and runs his hand through his unshaven face scruff and say "Well met!" to the twisted Succubus. Alone in his heart, Papparin commits sudoku at a Starbucks in San Bernardino with Al Pacino, no cappucino.
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

Stand back foul milkerino

twitchquotes: <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ I am the knight of healtherino. Stand back foul milkerino <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

The POLICE Just Stopped ME

twitchquotes: The POLICE Just Stopped ME Came Up To My Window An Said "PAPERS"? So I Said "SCISSORS" I WON & Drove OFF The guy Must Want A REMATCH Cuz He Been CHASING Me For The Past 10 MINUTES 😳😩
twitch chat
August 2018

Kripp you promised to start a cooking show soon

twitchquotes: Hey Kripparino riparino, I know you love your Hearthstone but you promised your loving father that you would start a cooking show soon. The gig is up, after this game you must Gordon Ramsay us one splendarino disharoni.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Thanks Nivea!

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ GUYS GUYS , just used new Nivea Lotion on my donger and now it looks 10 years youger , THANKS NIVEA ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

Kripp you shaggy looking plant eating bum

twitchquotes: Kripp you shaggy looking plant eating bum i bet you can't even afford a real fedora like mine or treat a fine gal to a meal you smelly hobo *walks away turns around tips fedora and continues walking*
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Diablo 2 was great Kripp

twitchquotes: (◕‿◕✿) Diablo 2 was great Kripp, I especially loved the part where you mindlessly clicked in an endless, ball-numbing drone for hours on end as the screen flooded with indiscernible ***. (◕‿◕✿)
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

I can’t escape Fortnite

twitchquotes: I can’t escape Fortnite. I was on an airplane half an hour ago and through my headphones I heard some guy ask, “Do you play Fortnite?”. At first I couldn’t process the words, but I understood after he reiterated. “Dude, do you play Fortnite?” Then I heard someone respond behind me. “Fortnite?” Then another. “Yeah, that game.” I couldn’t shut them out before the cabin erupted into a chorus of Fortnite conversations. I felt like I was being suffocated. The man previously sleeping beside me woke up suddenly and contributed with “where we droppin' boys?”. The crying kid across the aisle stopped kicking and screaming just to say “Tilted Towers!”
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite

Dear Kripp, last night was incredible

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, last night was incredible. the feeling i got when you topdecked me was unforgettable. I want to hold you in my arms and give you so much value. Please respond. XOXO Trump
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
Waiting for adblock to be disabled

All is then right with the world

twitchquotes: Maybe his long Journey away from the evil drug that is Hearthstone has brought moral clarity to his life. Kripp rises up and breaks away from the shackles the succubus has locked Kripp in. Papaparrian holds the key and sets Kripp's mind free. He swears to never go back to Greece or play Hearthstone ever again. Kripp moves back in with Papa and finally gets his OJ sponsorship. The beautifully creamy wall is vibrant as Kripp uploads his newest video in the old wonderland. "Hey guys how's it going, Kripparian here." Kripp starts up PoE again in anticipation of the new expansion being released, theory crafting builds. He is happy and filled with life each day of streaming. All is then right with the world.
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing