[Copypasta] Everyone knows the crowd are all paid actors

twitchquotes: Everyone knows the crowd are all paid actors, but did you know the chat is all paid commenters too? I can prove it - all the other paid commenters in chat will also post this
twitch chat
March 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Year 2025, Riot takes over the world

twitchquotes: The year is 2025, Riot has finished acquiring Facebook and Google as well as the country of Germany, making it the first nation in terms of GDP. All games, electronic devices, appliances and vehicles are to be produced and purchased from Riot only, failure to do so may result in being set to League Reformation Camps.
twitch chat
October 2019

League of Legends

If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.

This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself. There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself. If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
May 2021

Only the chosen one can wield this sword...

twitchquotes: ๐• |๐• ๐• ๐• |=========> ๐•†โ„•๐•ƒ๐• ๐•‹โ„๐”ผ โ„‚โ„๐•†๐•Š๐”ผโ„• ๐•†โ„•๐”ผ โ„‚๐”ธโ„• ๐•Ž๐•€๐”ผ๐•ƒ๐”ป ๐•‹โ„๐•€๐•Š ๐•Š๐•Ž๐•†โ„๐”ป ๐”ธโ„•๐”ป โ„•๐•†๐•‹ ๐”น๐”ผ ๐•Š๐•ƒ๐”ธ๐•€โ„• ๐”ฝ๐•†โ„ ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿ˜๐•„๐•€โ„• ๐”น๐• ๐•€๐•‹'๐•Š โ„™๐•†๐•Ž๐”ผโ„. ๐”ธโ„๐”ผ ๐•๐•†๐•Œ ๐•‹โ„๐”ผ โ„‚โ„๐•†๐•Š๐”ผโ„• ๐•†โ„•๐”ผ? โ„‚๐•†โ„™๐• ๐•‹โ„๐•€๐•Š โ„™๐”ธ๐•Š๐•‹๐”ธ ๐”ธโ„•๐”ป ๐”ฝ๐•€โ„•๐”ป ๐•†๐•Œ๐•‹!
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp

How to win any Internet argument

May 2021

As Kripp installed the minecraft

twitchquotes: แด€s แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ ษชษดsแด›แด€สŸสŸแด‡แด… แด›สœแด‡ แดษชษดแด‡แด„ส€แด€า“แด› ษช สœแด‡สŸแด… แด›สœแด‡ แด…แด€ษขษขแด‡ส€ แด›แด แดส สœแด‡แด€ส€แด›. ษช ส€แด‡แดแด‡แดส™แด‡ส€ แด€ แด›ษชแดแด‡ แดกสœแด‡ษด แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ แดกแดแดœสŸแด…ษดฮ‡แด› แด›แดแดœแด„สœ แด›สœแด‡sแด‡ ษขแด€แดแด‡s. ษช ส€แด‡แดแด‡แดส™แด‡ส€ แด€ แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜ แดกสœแด แดกแด€s ษดแดสŸษชา“แด‡. ษดแดแดก ษช แด€แด ษดแดสŸษชา“แด‡. ษขแดแดแด…ส™สแด‡ แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing