[Copypasta] Everyone knows the crowd are all paid actors

twitchquotes: Everyone knows the crowd are all paid actors, but did you know the chat is all paid commenters too? I can prove it - all the other paid commenters in chat will also post this
twitch chat
March 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

AITA for slapping a stand-up comedian who dissed my wife?

AITA for slapping a stand-up comedian who dissed my wife? Okay, little background. My (53M) wife (50F) has a medical condition called Alopeca Areata, which basically means she has excessive hair loss, and is currently bald. My relationship with my wife wasn't stable over the years, and I've caught her cheating on me multiple times, but we've pulled through. Anyway, we went to an awards show and usually there is a comedian who hosts the show and makes jokes at everybody (in a good way). The comedian was a guy we know (and he knew us), and we had a really good time. At one point, he mentioned me and my wife and I was happy he acknowledged us. But then, he took a jab at my wife about her condition, which I thought was way out of line, but I laughed out of embarrassment. My wife, on the other hand, was not laughing at all and rolled her eyes. At that moment I knew I had to stand up for her. I got up on stage, smacked the sh*t out of the guy, and went back to my seat. The comedian was shocked and really wasn't expecting my reaction. He wanted to keep talking about my wife but I shouted at him to stop. Usually I don't curse, but I was really pissed about the whole situation. My friends could see I was upset and during the break they came to comfort me, but other people think I'm the asshole. What do you think?
April 2022

Am I The Asshole?

Will Smith Slap

You've been visited by Hellbear Smasher of fortune

twitchquotes: ส• อกยทแดฅ อกยท ส” You've been visited by Hellbear Smasher of fortune. Clap your paws and copy paste this message 5 times without getting banned by mods and luck be with you for the next year ส• อกยทแดฅ อกยท ส”
twitch chat
August 2014

To the conservative suburban woman behind me in line at Subway yesterday:

To the conservative suburban woman behind me in line at Subway yesterday: Iโ€™m sorry I kept referring to Fredโ€™s liberally mayoโ€™d oven-roasted chicken sub as a โ€œbukkake specialโ€. Iโ€™m sorry that you kept demanding that your teenage son explain why he was laughing so hard. Iโ€™m extra sorry that this turn of events led you to practically yelling โ€œETHAN, WHAT IS A BUKKAKE SPECIAL?โ€ in the middle of a crowded restaurant.
August 2021

Tall Dog

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘
December 2019

Stop posting useless stuff in chat

twitchquotes: Cแด€ษด สแดแดœ แด€สŸสŸ แดŠแดœsแด› sแด›แดแด˜ แด˜แดsแด›ษชษดษข แด›สœแด‡sแด‡ แดœษดษดแด‡แด„แด‡ssแด€ส€ษชสŸส สŸแดษดษข แด˜แดsแด›s แด˜สŸแด‡แด€sแด‡? Tสœแด‡ แดษดสŸส ส€แด‡แด€sแดษด สแดแดœ แด˜แดsแด› แด›สœแด‡แด ษชs แด›แด แด›ส€ส แด€ษดแด… ส™แด€ษชแด› sแดแดแด‡แดษดแด‡ ษชษดแด›แด แด„แดแด˜ส แด€ษดแด… แด˜แด€sแด›ษชษดษข แด›สœแด‡แด. Wสœแด€แด› ษชา“ แดกแด‡ แด€สŸสŸ แดŠแดœsแด› ษขแด€แด แด‡ ษชษดแด›แด‡ส€แด‡sแด›ษชษดษข แด ษชแด‡แดกs แด€ษดแด… แดแด˜ษชษดษชแดษดs แด€ส™แดแดœแด› แด›สœแด‡ sแด›ส€แด‡แด€แด ษชษดsแด›แด‡แด€แด… แดา“ แด˜แดsแด›ษชษดษข แดœsแด‡สŸแด‡ss sแด›แดœา“า“? PสŸแด‡แด€sแด‡ I ส™แด‡ษข สแดแดœ แด›แดกษชแด›แด„สœ แด„สœแด€แด›, แด›แด sแด›แดแด˜ แดกษชแด›สœ แด›สœษชs ษดแดษดsแด‡ษดsแด‡.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing