[Copypasta] Everyone knows the crowd are all paid actors

twitchquotes: Everyone knows the crowd are all paid actors, but did you know the chat is all paid commenters too? I can prove it - all the other paid commenters in chat will also post this
twitch chat
March 2018
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kermit the frog caused 9/11

Kermit the frog caused 9/11. In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alternate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene, however they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
February 2021

Paint me like one of your French grills.

twitchquotes: โˆ ( แ› ใ€โˆ )๏ผฟ Paint me like one of your French grills.
twitch chat
March 2016

A 31 yo Oak Tree named Clara

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, I've been following you for a while now, and today is a big day for me : I'm gonna get married. As weird as it looks, you've been a huge inspiration to me : since I've discovered your stream, I decided to go Vegan, and that's how I met my future wife : a 31 yo Oak Tree named Clara. Thanks again for streaming!
twitch chat
July 2018
Kripp

Statue for Hitler's assassin

Has anyone noticed this bullshit? It's honestly unfair how people like Churchill and Roosevelt got honoured for their leadership during WW2, but once you mention that Hitler's assassin should get honored as well, everybody fucking gets mad and starts calling you names. I cannot believe that people haven't honored Adolf in any way, shape or form for killing Hitler! I think one way we should honor Adolf is by building a giant statue of him in Berlin, the place where he killed Hitler by shooting him in the head, but the goddamn liberals aren't letting us do that! Instead, they claim that Adolf was "evil" and "a dictator", like bitch that's Hitler not Adolf you're mixing them up retard...
January 2021

Yuno Gasai

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–โ–€โ–Œโ–€โ–Œโ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–€โ–„โ–Œโ–Œโ–โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–โ–โ–’โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–„โ– โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–’โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–€โ–„ โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€ โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–Œโ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–Œโ–โ–’โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–’โ–โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–€โ–„โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’
September 2018

Weebs

Text-to-Speech Playing