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Obey the call of Kel'Thuzad!

twitchquotes: ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ　Ｍｉｎｉｏｎｓ，　ｓｅｒｖａｎｔｓ，　ｓｏｌｄｉｅｒｓ　ｏｆ　ｔｈｅ　ｃｏｌｄ　ｄａｒｋ，　ｏｂｅｙ　ｔｈｅ　ｃａｌｌ　ｏｆ　Ｋｅｌ’Ｔｈｕｚａｄ！ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

James Patterson plays Druid

twitchquotes: The date is December 19th, 2018, at 630 am. James Patterson has just finished making his morning coffee. James Patterson hates his job, but looks forward each morning to playing ladder with the one deck he could afford to craft: Druid. On turn two, he attempts to drag Wild Growth onto the battlefield. He rubs his eyes, and to his horror sees that the card now costs 3 mana. With nothing left to live for, James Patterson opens his apartment window and buys a subaru.
twitch chat
December 2018

Hearthstone

I used to be a real ad

Hello my fellow Trump subs

twitchquotes: Hello my fellow Trump subs. Alone we are not much but together we are strong. You cannot touch us Forsen Boys, no matter if you tuck us. So trump subs, copy and paste this message so we can defeat the Forsen Boys.
twitch chat
April 2015
Trump

Every stream must be filled with spammerino

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Well Met, I am summoned by the Lord of Spammerino. Kripp. Spammers I see chats in twitch where people talk casually. Commenting about games. Trying to learn and have fun. Every time I shed a tear when I see this... WE Will not stop! Until Every stream is filled with spammerino no modderino Unite Spammers ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Anything to get inside Kripp

twitchquotes: I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Kripp. That perfect, scrawny body. That shining forehead. The receding hairline of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I’ll never mate with him, pass my genes through him, and have nothing happen because he's a man. I’d do fucking ANYTHING for the chance to get inside Kripp. A N Y T H I N G.
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp
I used to be a real ad

Commonwealth of Veganism

twitchquotes: We have claimed, for Electoral Vote purposes, the Commonwealth of Veganism (which won’t allow legal meat eaters) the State of Twitch, and the State of Kripparian, each one of which has a BIG Vegan lead. Additionally, we hereby claim the State of Lettuce if, in fact, there was a large number of secretly dumped carrots as has been widely reported!
twitch chat
November 2020
Kripp

So my boyfriend loves to play dota 2

twitchquotes: So my boyfriend loves to play dota 2 and is very immersed in twitch culture and this has extended to his everyday conversation. It seems like he can't go one sentence without using one such twitch "meme", like "pogchamp", "omegalul", "monka s", "bible thump", or "monka giga". I am fine with him watching twitch and enjoying his video games but honestly it's quite embarassing when we are talking to someone in public and he just randomly busts out a twitch "meme". It's so cringey and all my friends think he's weird. And don't even get me started on the random japanese phrases (he's white...) I swear this sounds like a meme post but i promise this is my real life ;___;
twitch chat
November 2018

I watched your stream and went 1-3 just like you!

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp I'm 12 and I'm your biggest fan! I saw you play Artosis last year at BlizzCon, are you gonna win BlizzCon this year Kripp? I heard you were good at Arena. I watched your stream and went 1-3 just like you!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

I'm going to kill that prosterino

twitchquotes: The Prostitute asks the Kripp, "Why don't you make a D3 video?" Kripp flies into a rage and hits her with an ornate salt shaker yelling, "I'm going to kill that prosterino!" When the cops finally caught him, after the 2 hour shootout, Kripp lies bleeding on the ground and mutters weakly to the sky..."I played that perfectly, nothing I coulda done cough what a joke.."
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Surf, Psychic, Thunder, Blizzard

twitchquotes: Surf, Psychic, Thunder, Blizzard. There was a time when all 4 moves were used to achieve teh urn. But all that changed when the e4 attacked. Only the avatar, master of all 4 moves could stop them. But when the chat needed him most, he missed! 26 e4 attempts later and we keep losing. Some believe that pc will ruin the team. But I haven't lost hope, I still believe Starmie can save teh urn.
twitch chat
May 2019
TwitchPlaysPokemon
What happened to this ad? :(

I have heard that "lol you must be fun at parties" at least a hundred times

FUCK YOU. I have heard that "lol you must be fun at parties" at least a hundred times. GET FUCKING ORIGINAL. Jesus fucking christ. Stop saying the same fucking thing over and over and over again. Just because you don't agree with me DOES NOT HAVE SHIT TO DO WITH PARTIES. What the fuck. Do you fucking fart at parties or something? If so I don't want to go to your shitty-ass parties in the first place. I'll stick to my wine and cheese dinners, you know, REAL FUCKING PARTIES. I downvoted you because not one thing you said was original. You're just a robot programmed to say these phrases over and over again to feel connected to 1s and 0s on the internet. You've never been to a party. That's why you say those things. WELL I'M FUCKING tired. of it. I'm tired. Say that to me one more fucking time and I will find you. I'm taking a stand. I am so sick of the stupid "parties" comeback. It's not fun. It's not clever. It's really fucking hurtful. Thanks a lot, dick. So what if you don't like what I said. Is that any reason to dismiss my entire comment and quote a little comeback. What's next, you're going to explain to me with crayons or call out my bullshit by how I overcomplicating things? If I see one more fucking party comment, I'm going to lose it. I'm going off the fucking chain and fucking report all you motherfuckers who think it's funny to comment about being fun at parties. Try me. I will do it. I will go STRAIGHT TO THE FUCKING TOP and then I'll be the one laughing while you beg for my mercy. Then you know what I'll say while you come to me crying and begging to die so you can stop the agony? I'll say "You must be fun at parties." So yeah, If you must know, I am pretty fun at parties. Not that you'll ever find out, dick.
August 2021

Chat analyses Kripp's painting

twitchquotes: I honestly can't believe the idiocy of this chat sometimes. The green obviously represents Kripp's veganism, which is contrasted by the red below it, symbolizing animals and meat. The orange in the middle is a masterful representation of Kripp's balding spot, and the black strokes surrounding it are his attempts to hide it.
twitch chat
November 2018
Kripp

Twitch's terrible Bounty commercial

twitchquotes: Four people on me. Quick I need help. Dash, we're on then way. Come on guys we got this. NOOOO. NOOOO.Quick! The quicker picker upper.A spill? No biggie.That's right chat, ya GOTTA have Bounty at your battle station. My man! Let's get back into this. Cover Me, cover me. Guy's I'm still knocked over here. Bounty. The Quicker Picker-upper.
twitch chat
June 2020

Kripp's blood salt level is at a dangerous high

twitchquotes: Hei Kripparina, Dr. Enrico Salterino here. Your blood PJSalt level has reached a dangerous heigh. Reduce the PJSalt level immediately or face severe health implications. PLZ COPYPASTERION to save Kripparians life!!
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Twitch Chat allows 420 characters

twitchquotes: Twitch Chat allows 420 characters and there's 109,384 different characters that exist. So there's a total of 2.294*10^2116 possible chat messages that can exist. But you chose to spam that one
twitch chat
April 2019
I used to be a real ad

Look, I can play Death Standing too!

twitchquotes: Look, I can play Death Standing too!: ▲ Enter Private Room > Options > Skip. ▲ Take a Shower > Options > Skip > Options > Skip > Options > Skip. ◉ to Use Toilet (Standing) > Options > Skip. ✖ to Use Toilet (Sitting) > Options > Skip. ▲ Leave Private Room > Options > Skip.
twitch chat
November 2019

stop babyraging

twitchquotes: let's put out some rant here. you babyrage guys are pathetic. whenever kripp judges an aspect of the game, all of you take it as being salty and babyraging. its simply talking and discussing the game, dont be so closed minded, chat please.
twitch chat
July 2019
Kripp

Take action

twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

HBox’s tag actually has a secret meaning

twitchquotes: fun fact: HBox’s tag actually has a secret meaning. the Box is for his name, Boxuel. the H stands for “Hjelte” since he plays with the heart of William Peter "Leffen" Hjelte every tourney
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

I used to be a real ad

hello my name is Carlos i from Turkmenistan

twitchquotes: hello my name is Carlos i from Turkmenistan. I watch master Q.T.PIE stream everytiem. i have no arm or leg so i playing with my huge !@#$%. I quit my job at the teemo mushroom factori to becom pro player. I go from bronze IV to gold IX in six monts. pls no
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie
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