I just had a conversation w a ๐ that didnt resort to name calling... We just spoke our peace and wished ourselves good luck and now i dint know what to do with myself.
I think im going to go back and call him a bitch.
I just had a conversation w a ๐ that didnt resort to name calling... We just spoke our peace and wished ourselves good luck and now i dint know what to do with myself.
I think im going to go back and call him a bitch.
This Putin guy is insane!! ๐ฅ
-1,68m manlet ๐๐๐ป
-0 pussy ๐น
-0 major cities conquered ๐
-0 hairs left on his head ๐๐๐ป
-currency less valuable than robux ๐ฅ๐
-empty threats merchant ๐คฏ
-1,68cm ๐น๐น๐น๐น
Better dictator than Stalin??? ๐ฅ
-1,68m manlet ๐๐๐ป
-0 pussy ๐น
-0 major cities conquered ๐
-0 hairs left on his head ๐๐๐ป
-currency less valuable than robux ๐ฅ๐
-empty threats merchant ๐คฏ
-1,68cm ๐น๐น๐น๐น
Better dictator than Stalin??? ๐ฅ
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
Chat would benefit from watching you play Xayah or Varus
twitchquotes:Hey Sneaky, I think chat would benefit from watching you play Xayah or Varus. We're all sex starved weebs and when you play Xayah and Varus we get to see you get your shit pushed in
Hey Sneaky, I think chat would benefit from watching you play Xayah or Varus. We're all sex starved weebs and when you play Xayah and Varus we get to see you get your shit pushed in
Fulfill your wish, spam this fish
twitchquotes: FULFILL YOUR WISH BY SPAMMING THIS FISH
SabaPing FULFILL SabaPing YOUR SabaPing WISH SabaPing BY SabaPing SPAMMING SabaPing THIS SabaPing FISH SabaPing
Re-read my statement. Your reply is a logical fail
twitchquotes:Re-read my statement. Your reply is a logical fail. I would know because I scored a 174 on the LSAT which got me into Northwestern Law after graduating with top honors from UC Berkeley. BTW...the LSAT is an exam in logic.
Re-read my statement. Your reply is a logical fail. I would know because I scored a 174 on the LSAT which got me into Northwestern Law after graduating with top honors from UC Berkeley. BTW...the LSAT is an exam in logic.
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
game of doctor
when i was like 12 my neighbor invited me over and we played a game called โdoctorโ basically he took his pants off got fully erect and asked me to examine it. donโt even remember what happened after that. anyways BFT to the moon
when i was like 12 my neighbor invited me over and we played a game called โdoctorโ basically he took his pants off got fully erect and asked me to examine it. donโt even remember what happened after that. anyways BFT to the moon
I want to fuck myself!
Now before you guys assume, i am not gay. I was messing around with a selfie of myself on faceapp and decided to use the female filter. As soon as i clicked the icon, my life was changed forever. Those lusious lips, the well defined jawline, the adorable eyes and those perfect eyebrows instantly gave me a hard on. Before i knew it, i was stroking my cock faster than i had ever before. Within 2 minutss i had already cummed 5 times coating my whole bed with a layer of semen and my balls were drier than the shaharan desert. Could any of you nerds please find a way to bring my waifu to lifue. Thanks uWu.
Now before you guys assume, i am not gay. I was messing around with a selfie of myself on faceapp and decided to use the female filter. As soon as i clicked the icon, my life was changed forever. Those lusious lips, the well defined jawline, the adorable eyes and those perfect eyebrows instantly gave me a hard on. Before i knew it, i was stroking my cock faster than i had ever before. Within 2 minutss i had already cummed 5 times coating my whole bed with a layer of semen and my balls were drier than the shaharan desert. Could any of you nerds please find a way to bring my waifu to lifue. Thanks uWu.
My daughter is dating a douche-bag (response to /r/cryptocurrency post)
My daughter is dating a douche-bag
I don't know where I messed up, I thought I taught her well on what to look for in a man.
The guy just showed up at my house and starting rambling on about how DCAing 30 dollars in 4 months into Safemoon helped him understand finance and geopolitics. I told him he was completely oblivious about being in a ponzi, this only unchained a what I believed to be a cocaine induced speech saying that Safemoon was going to be the next Bitcoin and he was going to moon while buying "lambos" for his friends because he was no "Bitch-ass paperhands".
I'm a bank executive, so you can only imagine what a nightmare this is for me.
Don't know what the point of this post is, is not like my daughter is going to stop dating that idiot anyways. I'm scared about my daughter's future.
My daughter is dating a douche-bag
I don't know where I messed up, I thought I taught her well on what to look for in a man.
The guy just showed up at my house and starting rambling on about how DCAing 30 dollars in 4 months into Safemoon helped him understand finance and geopolitics. I told him he was completely oblivious about being in a ponzi, this only unchained a what I believed to be a cocaine induced speech saying that Safemoon was going to be the next Bitcoin and he was going to moon while buying "lambos" for his friends because he was no "Bitch-ass paperhands".
I'm a bank executive, so you can only imagine what a nightmare this is for me.
Don't know what the point of this post is, is not like my daughter is going to stop dating that idiot anyways. I'm scared about my daughter's future.
Forsen, would you do me the honor...
twitchquotes:Forsen, would you do me the honor and fuck my in the ass? Ever since I was a little child I've always dreamed of getting fucked by a streamer. And now, many years later, I've finally found the right one. Forsen, please be my saviour and fuck so hard that I can't walk for a week. Kisses and hugs.
Forsen, would you do me the honor and fuck my in the ass? Ever since I was a little child I've always dreamed of getting fucked by a streamer. And now, many years later, I've finally found the right one. Forsen, please be my saviour and fuck so hard that I can't walk for a week. Kisses and hugs.
Burger King tweet thread: women belong in the kitchen tweet
Women belong in the kitchen. If they want to, of course. Yet only 20% of chefs are women. We're on a mission to change the gender ratio in the restaurant industry by empowering female employees with the opportunity to pursue a culinary career. #IWD - We are proud to be launching a new scholarship programme which will help female Burger King employees pursue their culinary dreams!
Women belong in the kitchen. If they want to, of course. Yet only 20% of chefs are women. We're on a mission to change the gender ratio in the restaurant industry by empowering female employees with the opportunity to pursue a culinary career. #IWD - We are proud to be launching a new scholarship programme which will help female Burger King employees pursue their culinary dreams!
(โฬฟฤนฬฏโโฌโดโฌโด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
Sheldon says BAZINGA
"I've never been a fan of Internet Explorer" Crowd laughs nervously and a few grunts are heard from the back seats as people edge closer to hear the punchline. "Why not? Don't you like the internet?" The crowd suddenly stands up, aware that they are about to receive what they came for. People slowly edge closer to the set as Sheldon prepares for his next line. Sweat is clearly visible on his brow and his mouth is quivering in anticipation as he readies himself for what is about to happen. "I just prefer Firefox because, like the fox, I am cunning and nimble." The crowd suddenly surges forward as the words escape Sheldon's mouth. They are so powerful, they almost shake the very foundations of the CBS studios. He watches as, in what he perceives as slow motion, the crowd moves toward his fragile body. He has been preparing for this moment his whole life. This is his moment. This is his Emmy. This is his Golden Globe. This is even his Oscar. The crowd converges around him so quickly they ignore the trampled cries of Leonard and Penny, who now lie shaking on the floor, their bones crushed by the sheer mass of the crowd. Sheldon stares back at the eyes around him. What he sees are no longer people. What he sees is the human psyche stripped down to its core. Their lives, what they were before this moment has been forgotten. Ravenous. Hungry. They want one thing from him. Sheldon closes his eyes, clears his mind and relaxes his body. What happens next depends completely on the next few seconds. The time between this and what he mutters next feels like an eternity. Slowly, he opens his eyes. He looks at Leonard, then at Penny, both lying lifeless on the floor. Without a second thought, he says with resounding conviction... "BAZINGA" In a split second, the crowd pounces on his ready and waiting body. Man, woman, child all at once. Sheldon cries out in complete ecstasy as they consume his flesh. He stops suddenly, as he drifts into eternal slumber. Peace at last.
"I've never been a fan of Internet Explorer" Crowd laughs nervously and a few grunts are heard from the back seats as people edge closer to hear the punchline. "Why not? Don't you like the internet?" The crowd suddenly stands up, aware that they are about to receive what they came for. People slowly edge closer to the set as Sheldon prepares for his next line. Sweat is clearly visible on his brow and his mouth is quivering in anticipation as he readies himself for what is about to happen. "I just prefer Firefox because, like the fox, I am cunning and nimble." The crowd suddenly surges forward as the words escape Sheldon's mouth. They are so powerful, they almost shake the very foundations of the CBS studios. He watches as, in what he perceives as slow motion, the crowd moves toward his fragile body. He has been preparing for this moment his whole life. This is his moment. This is his Emmy. This is his Golden Globe. This is even his Oscar. The crowd converges around him so quickly they ignore the trampled cries of Leonard and Penny, who now lie shaking on the floor, their bones crushed by the sheer mass of the crowd. Sheldon stares back at the eyes around him. What he sees are no longer people. What he sees is the human psyche stripped down to its core. Their lives, what they were before this moment has been forgotten. Ravenous. Hungry. They want one thing from him. Sheldon closes his eyes, clears his mind and relaxes his body. What happens next depends completely on the next few seconds. The time between this and what he mutters next feels like an eternity. Slowly, he opens his eyes. He looks at Leonard, then at Penny, both lying lifeless on the floor. Without a second thought, he says with resounding conviction... "BAZINGA" In a split second, the crowd pounces on his ready and waiting body. Man, woman, child all at once. Sheldon cries out in complete ecstasy as they consume his flesh. He stops suddenly, as he drifts into eternal slumber. Peace at last.
Easter emoji pasta
HEY ALL U EASTER BUNNY๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฐ HOES!!! Today is ๐๐Easter!! You know what that means๐ค๐ค๐ค??? Itโs time to HOP over to DADDYS house so he can FUCK๐ซ๐ซ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฆ u like a rabbit!! Gotta get those Easter day cummies!! After u and daddy FUCK ๐ซ๐ฆ then itโs time for โช๏ธchurchโช๏ธ!!! Get ready for that HOLY DICK๐๐๐๐ because jesus is CUMMING๐ฉ๐๐๐ฆ back from the dead today to FUCK THAT EASTER BUNNY PUSSY๐๐ฉ๐๐๐๐ฆ๐๐. Then itโs time for the egg hunt ๐ต๐ต๐ต!!! U better find an egg!! Search in every HOLE๐๐ฉ CRACK ๐ซ๐ and CREVICE ๐ค๐๐ for the GRAND PRIZE ๐ค๐ getting that ๐ต๐ธ๐บPASTEL PUSSY๐๐ฃ๐ฎ RODE ๐๐๐ into the Easter sunset! Send this to all ur other EASTER BUNNY๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฐ HOES๐๐ซ๐๐ฆ. If u get 5๏ธโฃ back ur a ROTTEN COLORED EGG!!! If u get ๐ back ur a LOADED ๐๐ ๐๐ป๐๐๐ฆ๐ฆ EASTER BASKET. If you get 2๏ธโฃ0๏ธโฃ back? UR GETTIN FUCKED ๐ฑ๐๐๐ฆ๐ฆIN UR RABBIT ๐ฐ๐๐ฐHOLE TONIGHT!!!!
HEY ALL U EASTER BUNNY๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฐ HOES!!! Today is ๐๐Easter!! You know what that means๐ค๐ค๐ค??? Itโs time to HOP over to DADDYS house so he can FUCK๐ซ๐ซ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฆ u like a rabbit!! Gotta get those Easter day cummies!! After u and daddy FUCK ๐ซ๐ฆ then itโs time for โช๏ธchurchโช๏ธ!!! Get ready for that HOLY DICK๐๐๐๐ because jesus is CUMMING๐ฉ๐๐๐ฆ back from the dead today to FUCK THAT EASTER BUNNY PUSSY๐๐ฉ๐๐๐๐ฆ๐๐. Then itโs time for the egg hunt ๐ต๐ต๐ต!!! U better find an egg!! Search in every HOLE๐๐ฉ CRACK ๐ซ๐ and CREVICE ๐ค๐๐ for the GRAND PRIZE ๐ค๐ getting that ๐ต๐ธ๐บPASTEL PUSSY๐๐ฃ๐ฎ RODE ๐๐๐ into the Easter sunset! Send this to all ur other EASTER BUNNY๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฐ HOES๐๐ซ๐๐ฆ. If u get 5๏ธโฃ back ur a ROTTEN COLORED EGG!!! If u get ๐ back ur a LOADED ๐๐ ๐๐ป๐๐๐ฆ๐ฆ EASTER BASKET. If you get 2๏ธโฃ0๏ธโฃ back? UR GETTIN FUCKED ๐ฑ๐๐๐ฆ๐ฆIN UR RABBIT ๐ฐ๐๐ฐHOLE TONIGHT!!!!
lethal
twitchquotes:Amaz moans hard as Kripp gropes his smallish package. โPepperoniโ Kripp whispered into Amazโs elvish ear, as they started making out. โDoโฆdo I win?โ Amaz says tentatively, as Kripp slowly tugs away his pants. โYour deck is crazyโ Kripp says, as he flips Amaz on his back. โItโs lethal guysโ Amaz says playfully, as he presents his Twisting Nether.
Amaz moans hard as Kripp gropes his smallish package. โPepperoniโ Kripp whispered into Amazโs elvish ear, as they started making out. โDoโฆdo I win?โ Amaz says tentatively, as Kripp slowly tugs away his pants. โYour deck is crazyโ Kripp says, as he flips Amaz on his back. โItโs lethal guysโ Amaz says playfully, as he presents his Twisting Nether.
GME short squeeze
Lets dumb this down for you apes:
- Let's say 5 banana's currently cost 10 dollar
- One ape on the market has 5 banana's
- Snake asks to borrow 5 banana's for a bit and instead sells the 5 banana's thinking price will go down soon (shorting). he thinks he can buy them later for less and give them back to ape, so he make's profit on the difference.
- Group of apes notice what stupid snakes are doing and decide to buy all banana's on the market until snakes have no other choice than to buy from the group of apes in order to return what they borrowed
- If group of apes stay strong then price will go ๐๐๐
Lets dumb this down for you apes:
- Let's say 5 banana's currently cost 10 dollar
- One ape on the market has 5 banana's
- Snake asks to borrow 5 banana's for a bit and instead sells the 5 banana's thinking price will go down soon (shorting). he thinks he can buy them later for less and give them back to ape, so he make's profit on the difference.
- Group of apes notice what stupid snakes are doing and decide to buy all banana's on the market until snakes have no other choice than to buy from the group of apes in order to return what they borrowed
- If group of apes stay strong then price will go ๐๐๐
Tides watches Reynad's stream after turning off his own stream. "This dude wanted me to make videos," he thinks. But then Reynad opens his donation page and he sees he makes 72k/month. Reynad's skype rings. "Yes?" he asks. "I do anal," replies Tides
I used to be a real ad
I saw it on the new hip website called Reddit!
twitchquotes:I saw it on the new hip website called Reddit! It's a pun on Read and It, Reddit! Isn't that swell! There are also these things called May-mays or otherwise known as memes there. They're really funny
I saw it on the new hip website called Reddit! It's a pun on Read and It, Reddit! Isn't that swell! There are also these things called May-mays or otherwise known as memes there. They're really funny
Flex Tape
twitchquotes:To show you the power of Flex Tape, I SAWED THIS BOAT IN HALF and repaired it with only Flex Tape. Not only does Flex Tape's powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong, water-tight seal so the inside is completely dry. YEE DOGGIE! Just cut, peel, stick, and seal. Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!
To show you the power of Flex Tape, I SAWED THIS BOAT IN HALF and repaired it with only Flex Tape. Not only does Flex Tape's powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong, water-tight seal so the inside is completely dry. YEE DOGGIE! Just cut, peel, stick, and seal. Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!
I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
(โฬฟฤนฬฏโโฌโดโฌโด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
If you're a grown-ass man and you still wipe your ass, you're not a real man.
This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself.
There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself.
If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.
This should be self-explanatory but apparently, I have to justify myself.
There's nothing more feminine than using a product on your body. Makeup is 100% feminine and by the same logic, so is wiping your ass. I haven't wiped my ass in about 4 years, and I've NEVER had any issues. My digestive system is in the top 1% in terms of regularity, functionality, and performance, and I've never once felt the need to "clean up" after myself.
If you shit, and you need to wipe, you've got an emasculated GI tract and that's your own issue. Man up and get your shit (literally) together.