[Copypasta] To be fair, you need a very high IQ to understand The Bible

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Bible. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Jesus’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike The Bible truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in God’s existential catchphrase "Never trust anyone completely but God." which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as King James's genius wit unfolds itself on the pages. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Bible tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
August 2021
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Cock and ball torture

Cock and ball torture (CBT) is a sexual activity involving application of pain or constriction to the male genitals. This may involve directly painful activities, such as wax play, genital spanking, squeezing, ball-busting, genital flogging, urethral play, tickle torture, erotic electrostimulation or even kicking.[1] The recipient of such activities may receive direct physical pleasure via masochism, or emotional pleasure through erotic humiliation, or knowledge that the play is pleasing to a sadistic dominant. Many of these practices carry significant health risks.
August 2021

NSFW

Which Rogue card should I pick?

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, I'm drafting a Rogue Arena and I'm 29 cards in. Should I pick Backstab (like you backstabbed Paparrian ) Betrayal (like you betrayed Paparrian ) or Vanish (like you vanished from Paparrian)
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Angry laughing crying

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣾⣿⠿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⠏⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣩⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡟⣽⣿⡏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⢃⣾⡿⠏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣇⣾⣿⠅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢽⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡗⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⡿⢿ ⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⡿⠟⠛⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠉⠙⠻⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣻⣿⡆⢸ ⣰⣿⡷⠀⠀⠀⣼⠟⠁⠀⢀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⡟⣻⠏⠀⠀⢀⣤⣤⡀⠀⠈⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣧⢠ ⢻⣿⠇⠀⠀⢰⡟⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠘⡧⠙⢿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⡿⠋⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠈⡗⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⢸ ⣼⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⣧⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⠟⠁⠀⠀⣸⣇⡀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⣠⣶⣿⡄⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠁⠀⠀⣸⠇⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⢸ ⡿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠘⢷⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠋⠻⣿⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣾⠟⠁⠀⠙⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⢨⣿⡟⢸ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣧⣤⠤⠶⠿⠷⠶⢶⣶⣾⣯⣀⣀⣀⣈⣛⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⡟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⠈⠉⠉⣭⡍⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣦⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣤⣶⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣶⣿⡟⠁⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠈⠹⣿⣷⣶⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
June 2021

My boyfriend doesnt know (from r/trueoffmychest)

At the beginning of this month, my boyfriend received an email from his brother with the subject "Dude check this out" and a Google Doc called "!!NEW RAP!!". When my boyfriend opened it, all that was on the doc was a picture of Nikocado Avocado’s asshole. When my boyfriend texted his brother about receiving his email, he replied "what email?". They’ve been going back and forth since about the email, my boyfriend’s brother saying he never sent an email and my boyfriend thinking he’s keeping up the act. What my boyfriend doesn’t know is I sent the email. I made an almost identical looking email, one letter off, and even managed to find the exact email profile picture from his brother’s LinkedIn. Now it kills me every time I see them go at it. I’m literally pissing myself as I write this.
May 2022

Reddit

SPAM THESE BOATS IF YOU'RE SICK OF GOATS

twitchquotes: SPAM ⛵ THESE ⛵ BOATS ⛵ IF ⛵ YOU’RE ⛵ SICK ⛵ OF ⛵ GOATS ⛵
twitch chat
March 2019
OverwatchLeague

Rhyme Chant

Overwatch

Text-to-Speech Playing