[Copypasta] To be fair, you need a very high IQ to understand The Bible

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Bible. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Jesus’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike The Bible truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in God’s existential catchphrase "Never trust anyone completely but God." which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as King James's genius wit unfolds itself on the pages. What fools.. how I pity them. 😂 And yes by the way, I DO have a Bible tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Don/ Pepperoni, captain of the anti-riot police

twitchquotes: ᕼEᒪᒪO TᗯITᑕᕼ ᑕᕼᗩT, ᗪOᑎ ᑭEᑭᑭEᖇOᑎI ᕼEᖇE, ᑕᗩᑭTᗩIᑎ Oᖴ TᕼE ᗩᑎTI-ᖇIOT ᑭOᒪIᑕE. ᔕTOᑭ ᖇIOTIᑎG ᖇIGᕼT ᑎOᗯ, Oᖇ YOᑌ ᗯIᒪᒪ ᗷE TOᑭᗪEᑕKEᗪ. YOᑌ ᕼᗩᐯE ᗷEEᑎ ᗯᗩᖇᑎEᗪ. ᑎO ᑭᑌEᖇTO ᖇIᑕO ᑭᗩᔕTEᖇIᑎO ᗪE ᑎIᖇO TᗩᖇEᑎTIᑎO
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Origin of Twitch chat Sub Mode

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Kiwi's Father, Pineapple

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⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⢀⣀⡄⡀⠙⠿⣿⣿⡏⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⡁⠄⡓⡩⠐⠚⠲⣈⡢⣈⠛⢷⠄⠄⠄⠄⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠊⣴⠖⠂⣠⣶⣷⣄⡉⠸⠧⡵⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠋⡁⠐⢥⡚⠑⣁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠙⠉⣳⡀⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠟⠉⠠⣂⠔⠌⢀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡈⠣⠍⣶⠄⠉⠻⣿⣿ ⡂⢄⠒⠈⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠙⠒⡃⢀⠄⠙ ⠔⠄⠄⠈⠁⠄⠈⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠛⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠳⠄⠈⠉⠤⢳ ⣄⣤⣤⠘⠛⠛⠓⠄⣀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣤⡶⠿⠿⣷⣶⣤⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀ ⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⢠⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣠⣾⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡁⠈⠙⠛⠛⠉⠉⠉⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠄⣸⣿⣿ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿ ⣤⣿⣿⣿⣯⣀⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠁⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⣆⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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Think you can beat me?

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⠄⠄⠒⠂⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⣰⣶⣦⡈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄THINK ⠄⠄⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣖⣿⣷⣴⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄YOU ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⠛⠩⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄CAN ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣤⣾⣿⣿⡏⠉⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄BEAT ⠄⠄⢀⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠺⡇⠄⢵⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ME ⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠁⠄⣷⣀⠈⠙⠛⠑⠄⠄⠄⠄1,2,3? ⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⡇⠹⣿⣿⣿⡦⠄⠹⢿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⢰⣤⣀⣀⣠⣔⢰⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡈⠄⠄⠄ ⢠⣿⣿⠟⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⢸⡆⠄⠐⠄⢸⣿⣌⠄⠄ ⢸⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⢸⣿⡿⢿⡤⠄⠈⠄⠄⢀⠄⢰⣿⣿⡄⠄ ⠈⢿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⣿⣷⣦⠄⠐⠄⠄⠄⠘⠄⠘⢿⣿⡇⠄ ⠄⠈⠻⣿⣇⠠⠄⢀⡉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡆⠄⠄⠘⣿⡇⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣧⢀⣿⣿⢷⣶⣶⣶⣾⢟⣾⣄⠄⡴⣿⡀⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣿⣧⣝⣿⣷⣝⢿⣿⠇⢸⣿⣿⡎⡡⠋⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣝⠛⠋⠁⣿⣿⡎⢠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⠁⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄
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Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing