I know this is really stupid but I’m sad about it.
Yesterday I had a friend come over. I’m a girl who lives alone so I guess some “dude” stuff hasn’t been done around the house.
Context: I have a spider named joe. He’s a dandy long leg. He’s been my friend in the bathroom for months and had recently made his way down to closer by me by the tub instead of on the ceiling. I like to think I gained his trust.
Well my friend goes into the bathroom and comes out said “you’re welcome”. I’m super confused. So I ask “for what?” He says “I just killed a big ass spider for you”.
I couldn’t even contain myself. I just yelled “YOU KILLED JOE?!” And started tearing up. I didn’t tell him to leave Joe alone it never occurred to me. JOE TRUSTED ME. Joe had been in my bathroom since he was super tiny and he grew to be such a big boy.
My friend was distraught. He’s a Pisces, so he immediately felt my deep sorrow for Joe. He apologized and swore to never squish any more spiders at my house.
I think Joe was biologically female because there is a baby Joe. Baby Joe is on my ceiling but idk if I can gain Baby Joe’s trust after they witnessed the murder of their parental figure.
RIP Joe I miss you so much. Getting ready in the morning will never be the same.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Full of acknowledgment of the farce he has become
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Kripp
Smoking Frog
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Sleeping in bed with your parents
twitchquotes:
Question for those in chat: Let's say you are sleeping in bed with your parents. You are in the middle. You wake up and want to get up, but you notice that you are partially inserted into your mom and your dad is partially inserted into you and they are still asleep. Which way do you thrust to get out?
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Reddit is a privilege, not a right
I just downvoted your thread.
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Chuck Testa and Cattarian
twitchquotes:
Hey Kripparian its me Chuck Testa. I'd personally like to Taxidermize your friend beast Cattarian. "Hey Kripp, it's me Cattarian and I approve of this method!" NOOOOPE it's just me Chuck Testa. Your cat would appreciate being worshiped and praised in the afterlife though. So, lets get that cats body and let me do my hobby.
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Kripp