[Copypasta] RIP Joe the Spider

I know this is really stupid but I’m sad about it. Yesterday I had a friend come over. I’m a girl who lives alone so I guess some “dude” stuff hasn’t been done around the house. Context: I have a spider named joe. He’s a dandy long leg. He’s been my friend in the bathroom for months and had recently made his way down to closer by me by the tub instead of on the ceiling. I like to think I gained his trust. Well my friend goes into the bathroom and comes out said “you’re welcome”. I’m super confused. So I ask “for what?” He says “I just killed a big ass spider for you”. I couldn’t even contain myself. I just yelled “YOU KILLED JOE?!” And started tearing up. I didn’t tell him to leave Joe alone it never occurred to me. JOE TRUSTED ME. Joe had been in my bathroom since he was super tiny and he grew to be such a big boy. My friend was distraught. He’s a Pisces, so he immediately felt my deep sorrow for Joe. He apologized and swore to never squish any more spiders at my house. I think Joe was biologically female because there is a baby Joe. Baby Joe is on my ceiling but idk if I can gain Baby Joe’s trust after they witnessed the murder of their parental figure. RIP Joe I miss you so much. Getting ready in the morning will never be the same.
May 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Bitcoin

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣾⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣼⣿⡿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣸⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠸⠿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣷⠀⠀ ⠀⢠⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣧⠀ ⠀⣾⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⢀⣠⣿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⠀ ⠀⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣥⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠀ ⠀⢿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⠀ ⠀⠘⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⡟⠀ ⠀⠀⢹⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⢰⣶⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⠿⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⡿⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢻⣿⣷⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣾⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
January 2021

Chat, I am an alien from planet Xenu

twitchquotes: ༼◥▶ل͜◀◤༽ Chat, I am an alien from planet Xenu. I do not know what this "saltiness" tastes like. Would you demonstrate the flavor of salt for my kind? ༼◥▶ل͜◀◤༽
twitch chat
September 2015

salty

It is canon that Kermit the Frog caused 9/11 in the Muppet universe

In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alrernate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene; however, they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
August 2021

Die spider!

twitchquotes: ༼ ಠل͟ಠ༽︻デ=一 DIE SPIDER /ก็็็็็็็็็็็็็╲/\╭(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)╮/\╱ก็็็็็็็็็็็็็\
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

Visited by the MIGHTY DREADSTEED of the Nether

twitchquotes: 🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎 IF YOU SEE THIS WHILE SCROLLING you have been visited by the MIGHTY DREADSTEED of the nether, he will leave you alone BUT only if you COPY and PASTE this message 3 times 🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎
twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing