[Copypasta] Nice opinion, but it's wrong

Nice opinion, just one tiny problem with it. Inspecting your post, it looks like your opinion is different from mine. Let me tell you something, I am the baseline for opinions. Any opinion I hold is objectively correct and as a result, any other opinions are wrong. Guess what? You happen to hold the wrong one! I hope you know that your opinion is now illegal. I have contacted the FBI, CIA, the NSA, the navy seals, secret service, and your mom. You'll be sorry you ever shared your opinions, by the time you're reading this, you'll be done for. Nature will punish you. Humanity will punish you. supernatural beings will punish you. Space will punish you. We decided just to make sure we'll nuke your house from orbit. So there's no chance you can run away, everyone will know you will die. It's a small price to pay, to remove your wrong opinion from this world.
January 2022
I used to be a real ad
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The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza

The waiter says "Say When", grating the parmesan cheese over my pizza. Foolish mistake. Anyone should know that there is no "when". As parmesan fills the restaurant, the pizza only gets better. After only an hour, the restaurants interior its completely filled with parmesan, killing twenty. But the resuraunt is only the beginning. Next the USA will be taken by parmesan, a force stronger than anyone could have anticipated. After that comes the world. Consider this a warning, to get to a foreign planet immediately. At least that will provide temporary safety, until the parmesan rises to mars. At that point, there will be enough cheese on my pizza, and I will be ready to eat.
August 2021

Joker

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–โ–โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–Œโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘ โ–‘โ–โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€ โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–โ–„โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
November 2014

Listen to me, chat. You have a problem

twitchquotes: Listen to me, chat. You have a problem. We both know you're depressed, anxious, and unhealthy in general. You spend all day on Twitch enjoying games vicariously through others and spamming copypastas in chat. This has to stop. I'm asking you NOT to copy and paste this message, but go outside for a change. Get a new hobby. Make some friends. Turn over a new leaf. It's your only hope at this point.
twitch chat
April 2018

Papparrian is proud of Kripparrian

twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

That's the power of cargo pants

twitchquotes: Excuse me? Cargo pants, motherfucker. My pockets have pockets. You can't stop the storage. And when it gets too hot, just unzip and remove the lower half of the legs. Utility, motherfuckers. Want me to hold your phone for a second? how about I hold one of every phone on the market, each with their own individual pocket. Want me to hold your souvenir from your vacation to Europe? How about I put Europe in my pocket. That's the power of cargo pants, motherfuckers
twitch chat
August 2019
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