[Copypasta] Ahsoka Tano

twitchquotes: Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano? She was your father’s exotic teenage alien apprentice, a fine piece of jailbait from a more civilized age. She had the tightest body and the perkiest little breasts in the galaxy; barely legal in most systems. Anakin and I used to doubleteam her at the end of every successful campaign during the Clone Wars, and once in a while we’d even have the entire 501st run a train over her, part of official Jedi “training” of course. In time, she learned how to handle a meatsaber better than anyone in the Jedi Temple. She wore a miniskirt every day so we told her there were no panties in space, and since she was constantly doing acrobatics you’d get a glimpse of her orange pussy mid fight as she’d do a flip while slicing a B2 Super Battledroid in half. It was surreal. We taught her to grip her weapon backwards like a dildo and she constantly got captured by pirates and slavers almost every other day. It was ridiculous, like a constant porno Luke, you have no idea. And she was a good friend.
twitch chat
November 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

SPOOKY SCARY SKELETONS

twitchquotes: ヾ(❛ε❛“)ʃ SPOOKY SCARY SKELETONS SEND SHIVERS DOWN YOUR SPINE SHRIEKING SKULLS WILL SHOCK YOUR SOUL SEAL YOUR DOOM TONIGHT ヾ(❛ε❛“)ʃ
twitch chat
September 2014
imaqtpie

Someone just posted that same paragraph...

twitchquotes: This is going to sound crazy, but someone posted that same paragraph just a minute ago. Here in this chat even. The odds of two people having the same paragraph-long thought is astronomical, especially in the same small website. Wow.
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

No YEP COCK today

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⠫⠓⠚⠉⠙⠓⠫⢻⠿⣟⠿⠭⠩⠛⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⠕⠁⣠⠴⠒⠋⠉⢉⣉⣛⣛⣲⣤⣀⠔⠒⠛⢒⣋⣹⣛⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⣖⡫⠝⠒⠂⠀⠀⠐⠺⣷⡲⠭⠛⠓⠒⠚⠫⠬⡻ ⣿⣿⡿⢟⠝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠮⣉⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⡿⠿⡆⠀⠈⡇⠀⠀⢰⣿⠿⡆⠀⠈ ⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡑⢄⠀⠀⠻⠿⠶⠃⠀⢀⡧⢄⡀⠘⠻⠶⠁⠀⣀ ⢧⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣄⡈⠓⣯⣖⣲⠤⠤⠴⠶⠯⠽⠦⢾⣿⡭⣬⡤⣩⣾ ⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⠴⠒⠉⠉⣁⡠⠤⠤⠔⠒⠒⠶⠶⠦⠤⢤⣈⣉⠛⢼⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⠁⠠⠴⠒⢋⣉⣠⠤⠴⠖⠒⠚⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠒⠲⠮⣭⡓⠯ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢎⠳⠤⠒⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢙⣳ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣱⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣱⣿⣿ ⣆⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿ ⠈⠙⠵⣒⠤⠤⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⣔⣮⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠒⠒⠮⠭⠭⢉⣉⣈⡉⠉⠭⠭⠝⠋⠘⠝⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣮⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ NO YEP COCK TODAY IM SAD
May 2020

Pepe

Artosis is glad Kripp is a sellout like him

twitchquotes: WELL MET KRIPP, IT'S ME ARTOSIS. I'M GLAD YOU'RE JOINING THE WAY OF THE SELLOUT. CONTINUE BEING A CASUAL SELLOUT LIKE ME AND YOU'LL GROW INTO A JEW NOSED GAMER JACKET SELLOUT
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

It's 2036

It’s 2036. Your mom was an e girl with an onlyfans and your dad is a sadboi guitarist. 98% of the Caucasian male students in school are named Aiden. Every afternoon you come home to check on Mom because she still thinks posting memes about wanting to die are in. She sees you pull out your homework and you sigh. “No, mom. I don’t want to listen to Lo-Fi beats to study and relax to.” She looks mildly disappointed but perks up again. “No horror trap/witch house either,” you interrupt. SadDad walks in and pats you on the back, but not before saying “Aye, fam. You look a little upset, u wanna go get a face tat?”
October 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing